Mod note: Best of Bankerella - this was originally posted 10/1/12

I occasionally get PMed by people at colleges I’ve never heard of before, asking if they have a shot at IBD.

Folks, why IBD? The finance world is broad and varied, and there are a million ways to make a buck. Why pick the one that’s going to be hardest for you in your situation? There are mutual fund companies, asset management companies all over the damn place. Hedge funds. Auxiliary businesses. Those folks will look beyond the name of your institution and your GPA in the hunt for quality. Why knock on the door of the one section of the industry that has built a massive recruiting machine designed to keep you out?

This is all representative of commonsense (but ultimately bad) advice I got during undergrad and followed blindly during internships. I sorted it all out by the end of my analyst program, but this was frequently accompanied by discomfort, late nights, and general suck.

You might disagree with my stance here. In fact, if you do, feel free to tell me in the comments. I'd very much like to hear that there are workplaces where the following work habits are rewarded rather than punished.

1: Turn changes as quickly as possible.

This is sometimes a recipe for disaster. The earlier you finish, the more time your boss has to second-guess everything. If you know your boss will iterate until the last moment and beyond, it often pays to build in a small amount of downtime for yourself. The finished product will be just as good (or bad), and you'll be slightly more rested for the next shit show they throw at you.

2: Never turn down a project.

Good general principle, but don't be dumb about it. It's nice to accept projects and workstreams up front from a wide variety of people so that your big workload is evident to all. This reputation can last a lot longer than the workload itself, giving you a chance to pick good projects and do well on them. On the other hand, use this reputation to parry anything likely to turn into a fire drill.

Best of bankerella, this was originally posted on 9/26/12

Interviewer: "So... what's your biggest weakness?"

To be honest, I think the biggest weakness question is one of the most bullshit questions you can get during an interview. But people keep asking it, so you’ve got to have a strategy. There are some shops/industries where the best strategy is truth. In most banking/PE interviews, not so much.

My favorite way to answer the biggest weakness question is to imagine the interviewer at their job and think about what they would relate to most strongly. Then I build an answer starting with, “I get impatient/frustrated when....”

Moderator Note (Andy) this was originally posted by bankerella on 9/5/12

All right, folks, got some hard stats here. Read 'em and weep, or rejoice (you know who you are).

Reminder: this is longitudinal career data from a sample set of several hundred bankers in bulge bracket IBD at all levels.

Make sure to see my previous posts in this series: 1. introductory post and 2. schools and promotion rates.

Also, I should say that I got no dog in this fight and couldn't care less where the talent comes from. Just trying to get some hard data out there so that, in the future, people can use it as an objective data point as they consider life choices. And so that working professionals can get back to doing what we truly enjoy doing on WSO: dicking around.

Undergrad

~10% of all individuals in the sample:

Georgetown (Yes, I was surprised too. I scrubbed these numbers personally and stand behind them. I am also not aware of any bias in the sample that would cause this. I think Georgetown might actually place more than anywhere else. Thoughts?)

~8% of the sample:

One of the biggest problems with having large corporations as clients is that there’s so much crap you’re not allowed to invest in actively in order to prevent any potential allegations of insider trading. There’s also a bunch of rules and paperwork that, honestly, few bankers have time to keep track of.

As a result, a lot of bankers just stick their money in ETFs (or a nice piece of Hamptons real estate) and forget about it. (I admit it, most of my money’s in ETFs right now.)

But let’s face it, we all know that you haven’t made it until you pay more in capital gains tax than in ordinary income tax. Passive investment is boring and is largely for betas and scrubs whose 401(k) is their largest source of liquid capital ( psssh!).

Andy note: this was originally posted on 9/14/12

So last time we established that when I come to recruit at your school (and I promise you, today I am recruiting at a school attended by probably at least 40-50 of the people on this board), I’m really just doing it to get a much-needed break from the office, a little sleep, and a chance to do my own thing (read: booze it up and party with old friends) for a day or two. It would be pretty cool if I could accomplish this without actually doing recruiting activities, because I find them just as awkward and lame as you do. But I’m stuck with it, and so are you. So here’s how you should make the best of it.

First, don’t be scared.

Every year around this time, some young monkeys hop on the forums and start moaning about how bad this year is for recruiting. You guys think it's bad? You ain't seen bad unless you've seen 2001, 2008, or 2009. But nevertheless, your auntie has good news. I recruited all last week, and let me tell you: the competition out there right now doesn't look as tough as you guys think it is. Here are the real gems from my week recruiting at our top targets:

Candidates who stare at or lengthily check their phones while talking to recruiters. If you aren't going to make eye contact with me, at least have the basic human dignity to stare at my boobs like the rest of the candidate pool. If you can't find something about me or my firm to stay interested in for ninety seconds, then the feeling is probably going to be mutual.

Guys, I'm back from four days spent recruiting at our top targets. Thought I'd share with you how a ballsy college junior with a 3.2 GPA and no internships who met me at an employer information session was able to skip straight to final rounds.

That's right: she figured out how to skip the resume screen, the phone screens, the first-round OCR, and the rest of the process we design so carefully to weed out all but the most competitive talent.

First, she was tidy, friendly, and professionally-dressed. She waited for the first wave of post-session aggression (see my last post for a description of the EIS hustle) to ebb away. She then stepped right up, shook my hand, and said, "I need advice. Could I have a moment of your time?"

All right, monkeys. Welcome to recruiting season. I am your interviewer.

No, seriously. I really might be your interviewer. This upcoming week your very own Auntie Bankerella will be hitting up several universities in a couple of different cities. I’ll be giving presentations, speaking at a panel, holding dinners, and, inevitably, interviewing a couple dozen of you monkeys.

Why would I do this when I have real work to do? Is it because I want my firm to have first dibs on the new generation of top talent? Is it because I want to fill my firm with alumni of my school to consolidate our power base? Is it because I lost a bet with HR? Is it so I can see how many monkeys post here next week saying, “Help, this [x] at [x firm] gave me her business card at a networking event and said I could call; what should I say and what questions should I ask?”

Hell no. I recruit because I’m fucking tired.