Bonus Bananas January 24, 2014

1) The death of Windows XP will impact 95 percent of the world’s ATMs (The Verge) - Microsoft is sunsetting a bunch of stuff this year, but the two big ones are Windows XP and Exchange Server 2003 (which handles a ridiculous amount of email traffic to this day). How far does this move the needle on the "Oh Shit!" meter? 95% of the ATM machines in the world run on a Windows XP backbone. While the machines won't all crash on April 8th, they will be infinitely more vulnerable to hacking after that date.

2) DOJ accuses firm that vetted Snowden of faking 665,000 background checks (NBC News) - When I read this article my first thought was, "If you're the DOJ, and you have access to arguably the world's largest and most sophisticated investigative apparatus, why the hell are you outsourcing Top Secret background checks???". But of course, since it's the government, not a single person will lose their job over this.

3) N.Y. 8-year-old saved 6 in fire, died trying to save 7th (USA Today) - This is an unspeakable tragedy on so many levels, but my God did this kid ever go out a hero. It breaks my heart to think that kids in America still live in conditions like this. Nine people living in a single-wide trailer? Are you kidding me???

4) How a Radical New Teaching Method Could Unleash a Generation of Geniuses (Wired) - It's pretty simple when you think about it: the delivery system for knowlege has undergone a species-altering upgrade over the past 20 years, so it stands to reason that the old methods of teaching should be a thing of the past. I won't be the least bit surprised to see the median IQ of the world rise significantly over the next fifty years.

5) The final Confessions of a Silk Road kingpin (The Daily Dot) - Remember lo those many months ago when no one had even heard of BitCoin yet? It was already the de facto currency of the Weirder Web, and its largest marketplace was the Silk Road - where you could (allegedly) buy everything from drugs to sex to contract murders. Here's the story of one of the Silk Road's biggest drug dealers, and if you only read one thing this week, make it this.

6) What Is Meow Meow, the Drug That Made a Teen Cut Off His Genitals? (Rolling Stone) - While we're on the topic of drugs, how's this for WTF? I'd almost rather shoot Krokodil into my crank.

7) Southwest Air, others, pressured to break ties with SeaWorld (CNBC) - If you haven't seen Blackfish yet, I dare you to go watch it and then ever set foot in SeaWorld again. The movie has had a huge impact on SeaWorld's stock price, and now major corporate partners are being pressured by consumers to distance themselves. As an animal rights advocate of sorts, I have to say I'm pretty pleased to see it.

8) Drugs, Death, Neglect: Behind the Scenes at Animal Planet (Mother Jones) - Yet another example of animal exploitation for human amusement. Pretty shocking.

9) BEST FILMS NEVER MADE #3 – NEILL BLOMKAMP’S HALO; "It was a clusterfuck from Day One." (One Room with a View) - Okay, so this never happened, but how bad ass would it have been if it did? Imagine the director of District 9 taking a stab at the Halo narrative. I'd line up to see that.

10) Quentin Tarantino Shelves ‘The Hateful Eight’ After Betrayal Results In Script Leak (Deadline) - Speaking of movies we might never get to see, some scumbag Hollywood agent leaked the script for Tarantino's next movie, and he's so pissed off he's decided not to make it now. Hollywood is such a sewer.

Video of the Week:

I have high hopes for augmented reality over the coming decades. I think things like Google Glass will revolutionize the way we interact with our world. That said, the following hype video for augmented reality start-up Infinity AR is just over the top. So far over the top it's laughable, in fact. The company is proposing that their augmented reality product (built on the Glass backbone) will turn you into a fashion plate pool hustler who is unstoppable with the ladies. I don't know what's funnier: how ham-fisted the production of this thing is, or the notion that it might actually work and turn guys all over the world into creepy real-time cyber stalkers. You guys tell me:

That's it for this week, monkeys. Have a fantastic weekend, and let me know what you think about this week's Bananas in the comments!

 

1 -- Windows XP was HUGE for my computer game nerd friends and I. We would set up LANs in my friends basement and play Counter-Strike, Team Fortress, Quake 2/3, etc. XP had revolutionary network support that a bunch of 14 year olds could figure out how to daisy chain 3 hubs to a router and get 8 people online at the same time, a task that was nearly impossible (for us) with Windows 2000 before it (made for great pranks on AIM). We were all using the same CD-key too so that was kind of cool.

This to all my hatin' folks seeing me getting guac right now..
 
Cruncharoo:

#1 -- Windows XP was HUGE for my computer game nerd friends and I. We would set up LANs in my friends basement and play Counter-Strike, Team Fortress, Quake 2/3, etc. XP had revolutionary network support that a bunch of 14 year olds could figure out how to daisy chain 3 hubs to a router and get 8 people online at the same time, a task that was nearly impossible (for us) with Windows 2000 before it (made for great pranks on AIM). We were all using the same CD-key too so that was kind of cool.

I still have CS 1.6 on my computer..
 
Going Concern:

It's unfortunate what happened with Tarantino's script, but calling all of Hollywood a sewer is a little ridiculous. If this was Wall Street there would not only be betrayal but probably dollars and cents involved as well. And for the record, while I enjoyed Pulp Fiction and Django I don't think Tarantino is THAT good.

If it were Wall Street he would still be correct lol

If the glove don't fit, you must acquit!
 

RE #3) Everyone else in the states has such a weird conception of "New Yorkers" as big city sophisticates. Go drive around upstate a little and you'll think you're in backwoods Kentucky.

People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for freedom of thought which they seldom use.
 
Anihilist:

RE #3) Everyone else in the states has such a weird conception of "New Yorkers" as big city sophisticates. Go drive around upstate a little and you'll think you're in backwoods Kentucky.

Sometimes I suspect that even parts of the city are like that but then again I don't go farther north than 96th st or deep in the seedy underbellies of the outer boroughs, so I wouldn't really know.

 
Going Concern:
Anihilist:

RE #3) Everyone else in the states has such a weird conception of "New Yorkers" as big city sophisticates. Go drive around upstate a little and you'll think you're in backwoods Kentucky.

Sometimes I suspect that even parts of the city are like that but then again I don't go farther north than 96th st or deep in the seedy underbellies of the outer boroughs, so I wouldn't really know.

Yeah, anything above 86th even is on the downhill IMO.

Just moved from below 86th to above it and now take express to/from 86 up/down.... it sucks.

People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for freedom of thought which they seldom use.
 
Best Response

2 - I disagree. When was the last time your saw a republican in the executive? Five years ago? Yeah they all screwed up and now they get beat in elections. Please...PLEASE...run Ted Cruz so he can lose and I can laugh at the GOP from 2016 to 2020. Privatizing public infrastructure isn't a one size fits all. Now the dems want to defend Obama 100% and run the next insider idiot. Great. Marvelous. WHAT ARE ALL MARCHING IN SLACK JAWED AGREEANCE WITH TODAY??

3 - Blows my mind as well. Forget the blame game and solutions game for a bit. Sometimes, I don't think people are bowled over enough by the reality to look beyond their ideology. There's basically no reason for this.

6 - whatever happened to people doing drugs that were fun? Ludes, weed, even coke were actually fun at some point before the addiction and bad decision making set in. These things are pure hell right out of the gate. I'm not advocating drug use at all, I don't use at all and just have a drink here and there, but if someone's going to indulge....shouldn't at least some part of it be pleasureable??? dafuq is wrong with people?

Get busy living
 

From the video, that infinity glass seems to be the useless stupidest product I've ever seen in my life! It's probably shaped like the word LOSER.

It's really hard to discern what's the worst thing about it, but I gotta give it to attempting to turn the real world into GTA. Yeah, that will be very safe. And how would I know to break before running into a truck without all those colorful graphs?

Cheating on pool? Voice analyzer? How about a magic X-ray to see underpants?

And they probably think they're changing the world.

 

2 - I could go on forever about this one. The only thing holding someone back from getting a high level security clearance is a prior conviction, unstable financial situation, or relationship with a foreign national. The people evaluating the security clearances are prohibited from "discriminating" candidates based on a hunch - the evidence must be concrete to hold up a clearance. Because there is little brain power required to preform the role of a background investigator, you wind up with security screeners who could just as easily be working for the TSA or ACORN. I actually think that the contracts are written deliberately to give more government contract jobs to people of low intelligence. It is a racket and the firms that preform the background checks make upwards of $100K per head.

 

Great BB this week! Enjoyed all the stories.

6) Seriously, what is wrong with regular old drugs?

7) I was looking at Seaworlds website & they are launching a PR onslaught to try and give their remaining fans a voice to show how great seaworld is. What a shitty company.

Video) What no sex scene? That would be the most useful part for a guy who uses "Are you a Gemini?" as a pick up line.

 

Speaking of train fights, would someone getting shot on camera kill the trend the way it did kids punching random people? I mean, that fad popped up and then when a few people got cut down it immediately stopped...and well it should. In a global city and have no concept of who it is you're dealing with at any given time....why would anyone initiate a brawl???

Get busy living
 

Quia aperiam repellat est molestiae et. Aut ut nihil aspernatur consequatur. Quam tempore fugit velit nihil. Modi vero est nemo ipsum aut sed voluptatem. Consequatur blanditiis architecto optio tenetur voluptatem et. Beatae architecto sunt omnis.

 

Necessitatibus animi fugiat perferendis consequuntur. Ut reprehenderit pariatur autem et omnis. Voluptatem et ut doloremque suscipit odio sit. Repellendus eveniet odio delectus nihil quaerat voluptates ea autem.

Non saepe atque tenetur hic. Et ut et eaque exercitationem amet dolores non. Est est veniam ad recusandae aliquid temporibus ad illo. Sed a ut quis excepturi harum. Est laborum non aspernatur.

Nulla cupiditate inventore consequatur aut est autem. Sit necessitatibus sequi deleniti illum. Laborum perferendis eos nemo voluptatem eveniet ut. Voluptas provident ut unde perspiciatis vitae ab maiores.

Career Advancement Opportunities

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Jefferies & Company 02 99.4%
  • Goldman Sachs 19 98.8%
  • Harris Williams & Co. (++) 98.3%
  • Lazard Freres 02 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 03 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Harris Williams & Co. 18 99.4%
  • JPMorgan Chase 10 98.8%
  • Lazard Freres 05 98.3%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.7%
  • William Blair 03 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Lazard Freres 01 99.4%
  • Jefferies & Company 02 98.8%
  • Goldman Sachs 17 98.3%
  • Moelis & Company 07 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 05 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Director/MD (5) $648
  • Vice President (19) $385
  • Associates (86) $261
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (13) $181
  • Intern/Summer Associate (33) $170
  • 2nd Year Analyst (66) $168
  • 1st Year Analyst (202) $159
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (144) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
3
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
99.0
4
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
5
kanon's picture
kanon
98.9
6
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
7
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
8
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
9
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
10
numi's picture
numi
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”