See Part 1 here.
Part 2
And rest in peace to my mother fucking homeboy, but hold your tears, he ain’t die, he just a fuck bitch – Freddie Gibbs
Now, you are probably wondering how a group of analysts are going to try and take down some members of management. It actually isn’t that hard when they are both extremely full of themselves and think they are smarter/better than they actually are.
We began keeping close tabs on them and how often they were meeting while excluding us. They began to become even more separated from the group. We noticed a huge influx in “external client meetings” – which was odd because when we would keep in touch with our clients, we would ask simple questions like, “Did your meeting with Analyst 4 and our Director go well?” Almost always, the answer returned with, “Ya, it went great and we will get back to you guys about exploring those additional consulting opportunities.”
This was a definite red flag. Something was up considering we weren’t a consulting company. We offered specific technologies for niche industries – our group’s goal was to help grow our company, not consult other companies on how to grow their company outside of using our product.
One day we conducted a simple Google search on Analyst 4. That was all it took. We stumbled upon his linkedin page to see his inflated and laughable resume. You would have thought this guy was a founding partner at KKR. In addition to listing his current position, we found that he was also founder and CEO of some bullshit consulting company whose main focus was nothing more than acting like one of the Bob’s from Office Space. Nevertheless, we put two and two together. This guy was using our company as an in for his “advisory company”.
We quickly searched for the Director’s linkedin and saw that the company wasn’t listed. We checked out the advisory’s website and saw that Analyst 4 was the only person involved – at least on paper. We didn’t really have any concrete evidence on the Director and assumed he possibly only played an advisory role to Analyst 4 – either way, he was smart enough to stay away from it.
As I alluded to before, the only thing our C-Level leadership cared about was money - their money. Analyst 4 had made the mistake of possibly fucking up their cash flows as well as possibly destroying future and current contracts. Someone grab the chalk, this guy’s done.
Slightly before this discovery I had begun having conversations with the Director regarding a possible promotion and increased salary. I explained this situation, his response and my decision in a previous article I wrote. To summarize, he said no and I looked for employment opportunities elsewhere. I had put in my two weeks due to securing new employment by the time we found out about the consulting company.
The C-Level executives were notified about the consulting agency through a private meeting with the analysts. They were furious and said they would take corrective action immediately, promising to keep the meeting a secret and to be as vague as possible when confronting Analyst 4 and the Director.
As expected, the Director went unscathed. He denied his involvement completely and Analyst 4 did not attempt to throw him under the bus. I am still not sure if he was involved or not. He was a real slick douchebag and always covered his tracks, the type of guy that would respond to emails via telephone so there was no paper trail. You know the type.
Analyst 4 was fired that day – citing some sort of breach of his non-compete clause. I am sure it really didn’t matter what reason they gave, he was using the company’s clients to sell his third party “consulting” service almost as an extension of our company. We all wondered why legal action wasn’t taken – I mean, what he was doing had to have been illegal and must have resulted in some sort of financial loss for the company. Well, the answer was quite simple. He had no clients. No billable hours. Nothing. No one used his shit service – which is fucking hilarious.
Now, this is a pretty long and nasty story. My time at the company wasn’t all bad and I can assure you that this piece of drama definitely was not the center point of it. The main thing I want you to take away from this is to cover your ass and watch out for yourself because at the end of the day, you are the only one with your best interests at heart.
There is constantly a game being played outside of the actual job you were hired to do – sometimes you have to play that game in order to help yourself and sometimes you can avoid it completely.
Unfortunately, throughout your career you are going to find yourself in similar situations like this (and if you are a piece of shit, possibly situations similar to Analyst 4). Keep in mind that if enough people hate you, they will conspire to get rid of you. If and when you get dragged into the nastiness, just make sure you aren’t the one getting white chalked.
Two things to take away from this:
1 – Don’t broadcast your entire life on the internet.
There is no need to put up everything you are doing on Facebook or Linkedin, you never know when it will work against you.
2 – Choose your friends carefully.
This is a solid tip to take away in life in general, but even more so with work. Small things like not friending people you work with on Facebook can actually go a long way. Keep work at work and outside of your personal life. If you are forced to mix the two, watch the interaction carefully and keep it at arm’s length.
Great story. Wasn't worth waiting a week for part 2 however. This is something that I would expect on CNNMoney, but not on WSO haha.
I broke it into two parts due to length
Wow solid Freddie Gibbs inclusion A+++
//
The Most Outlandish Office Politics Story, Pt 1 (Originally Posted: 08/28/2013)
Part 1 Haters shake my hand but I keep the sanitizer on deck – KiD CuDi
As most of you have probably already come to realize, work is not just work. A lot of people aren’t fortunate enough to just show up to their job, do their work and reap the rewards for a job well done in the form of promotions and increased pay. On the contrary – you need to balance the responsibilities of your job by busting through the status quo and playing the game at the same time, often times choosing an alliance.
The following is a personal recap of one of the most interesting and outlandish instances of office politics I have ever encountered. So interesting it will have to be broken into two parts due to length. It started off as two ambitious guys working together for a common goal in the company (even becoming friends outside of work) and ended with one of them being white chalked.
For those of you unaware of the term white chalking, it is basically the ending or killing of a project or something business related. “That deal was white chalked” – “The project was white chalked” – “Let’s white chalk this guy’s career.” It essentially refers to a white chalk outline at a crime scene. I think you get the idea.
Rewind way back to my first job. I started out as a strategy analyst for a small tech firm in New York. It was a brand new department being created at the company due to their goals of expanding. It was headed up by a Director, whose org consisted of a manager and four analysts (me, two other guys similar to me and, let’s call him, Analyst 4).
Analyst 4 was a year older than me (so he had one more year of experience) and had a CPA (which was almost completely useless for the job we were in). We all started off as friends, happy to have the opportunity, be a part of something new and exciting, building a new department from the ground up, working closely with C-Level executives that were self-made millionaires from the creation of this company. The potential here was endless – or so I thought.
Because me and the other analysts were spending so much time together at work (and I am a friendly, extroverted guy) I typically invited them to hang out with my buddies and I outside of work, grabbing beers, etc. My friends got along great with the three analysts I worked with and they quickly became a part of the group. Analyst 4 and I became really good friends during this time period as well.
Throughout the months of working with the new team you could tell a clear line was being divided within the group. Our Director was a complete jackass on every level: incompetent, unethical, sleazy, two-faced, etc. He only cared about himself. For example, he didn’t live in NY (where we were HQed), he lived in California. He flew in every Monday (halfway through the day) and left Thursday night – literally putting in maybe three days of solid work. How he was able to do this and how he had the wool pulled over leadership’s eyes, I will never know. Because of this, we paid for his travel, rental car, hotel and per diem, weekly. This crushed our overhead and ate through our department’s budget – budget that could have been used for personal career development, development classes, conferences, etc.
Due to his level of jackassery, my manager began drifting from him, attempting to run the department solo due to his lack of attendance. He no longer went through the Director to vet work or get the green light. He basically assumed the Director’s role in his absence. This was when sides were drawn in our department. Naturally, we went with our Manager – it offered a clear and concise career path and mentorship and seemed like it would open even more career opportunities. Analyst 4, on the other hand, went with the Director – most likely because he was still the man on paper and could benefit the most from him if our current Manager did not become the Director.
Around this time is when there was complete turmoil within the group. There was a clear lack of leadership due to our Director intentionally jamming up our work and productivity, attempting to actually negate and refute work that we would submit if it came from the Manager instead of him, personally. He also began working in a vacuum with the assistance of Analyst 4.
It was because of this that my Manager decided it was time to look elsewhere for employment. The company could no longer offer the career track it had initially promised due to the Director stonewalling our group. He put in his two weeks through his letter of resignation. He had recommended that the company appoint me to take his place or at least prepare the proper steps to make me ready for that position. That, in and of itself was an honor. I had begun looking up to him as a mentor, so maybe he was a bit biased, but I was happy to see someone thought I was ready for a management position so young in my career.
Regardless, I didn’t get the job. Analyst 4 did. He was the Director’s whipping boy.
That appointment basically became the turning point in the group at work, and our friendship. The director and Analyst 4 worked almost exclusively in a vacuum leaving the other analysts and I out to dry. In addition, Analyst 4 went on a huge power trip. We were no longer friends, he made that very clear, we were his employees and we were to show him respect. Something I viewed as impossible. I can’t go from being friends with someone to attempting to respect them in an absurd and forced way like that. Whatever were we to do in this situation?
Our careers had become stagnant due to their partnership and the leadership of the company really only cared about growing revenue and profit margins – as long as they had huge sums of money lining their pocket, there was no need for a change. We knew this; we just needed to find a way to use it to our advantage. The only thing that would bring change is if their cash flow was being affected, or, had the possibility of being affected. This is when the other analysts and I set out to white chalk one or both of these fuckers.
Part 2 will be released Sept 4, 2013.
i dont get why u did this...am i reading it wrong or did u get nothing from getting this dude fired except some satisfaction? I mean it would be one thing if u got his job or something, but it reads to me like you were just bitter that this dude got promoted and you didn't. So now you made a new enemy (and an ambitous one) out of someone who was once a friend and still ended up having to get another job...dont really see how this was smart or anything other then some serious hating. bad karma.
And BTW i am not saying i am above being politically sharp-elbowed but only when i actually have something tangible to gain from it...to me getting someone fired just for personal satisfaction is kind of immature. You should have simply filed the info away for a time when u could extract something in return for knowing it...u dont throw away an ace like that for nothing.
Some men just want to watch the world burn.
This is gonna be a good one....
Definitely in agreement with this
Nobody likes a tease, @Nefarious-
You got me all worked up for nothing
Please make into a movie
Build up, build up, build up!!!
... blue balls...
Funny as shit! I was thinking the same thing. It's like she kissing on you...playing with it...rubbing on it...then, WAIT.....I gotta go. I'll be back Sept. 4. What the Fuck?!?!?!!!!! LOL!
Cool story. Even cooler trick you've pulled here. (why you little.....) LOL!
I like the "white chalk" term. I understood the meaning immediately, except that when you said it "ended up with one of them being white chalked" I really thought someone got iced lol.
Looking forward to this.
Sounds like #4 was the smartest monkey in the room. If you ever side w a subordinate, especially one about to leave, be prepared to leave with them. coups don't happen in the office often, this should be a lesson to all monkeys. i'm not saying be a whore either, but you shouldn't have to choose sides so clearly as in this case.
Oh the suspense…
Looking forward to the rest of the story. Great write-up, man.
So side with the director and be a good manager?
I remember the CFO of one of the Big 4 accounting firms came to visit our school to talk to us. He lived in Chicago and worked in NYC. He had his own apartment but the company flew him in every Monday and back to Chicago on Fridays. I was like U wot m8?
Company's do this for middle management as well. A buddy of mine flies 10 hours a week for a F10 company. They don't let him work at the office near his hometown but spend more than $10,000 a year flying him to another office in another state.
Good stuff, definitely reading part 2.
Oh man the suspense is gonna kill me!!
Decent story. Looking forward to round two. Seen a fair share of similar stories that might relate. Thanks for the write up.
But yeah. You gotta watch that alliance shit. Sometimes you cant allow that shit to be clear cut...for his very reason.
Lesson to all the youngsters out there. I've learned that at a certain level, ability to do the job is not the only thing it takes to succeed. Don't be so quick to make a move. Watch first...
Now, I think know how this going to play out. And, how to kill two birds with one stone. But I'd like to let dude finish the story.
@nefarious - with all the blue balls in the room, there's no way this story makes it to 9/4 b4 being dissected, analyzed and speculated upon, which could dilute the impact of the climatic ending....LOL
(in reference to the above analogy.....Look baby, don't rush off. It's late, we've been drinking, and cops are everywhere. Stay the night and I'll take you home in the morning. It's cool. Ain't nobody gonna know....)
Nice
Very nice write-up, can't wait to read the rest!
Great piece. P-2 definitely going to be interesting.
What a putz to put it on his LinkedIn profile
It was a well written story. A good story. A story that didn't live up to it's title.
I ave you a silver banana cause of your signature
He's had that signature for like two years.
Disagree bondarb. Is keeping the "ace in the hole" and fucking Analyst 4 down the road any more mature, if he does it when he can gain from getting the guy fired? Nevermind the fact that analyst 4 is screwing the company so it's the right thing to do anyways
That's irrelevant since he was leaving the company. Also, loyalty is to people, not artificial legal entities.
yes it would be way more mature if he had something to gain...to me getting someone fired just for fun and to brag on the internet is almost the definition of immaturity. It may not be any more "right" in the moral sense if he had something to gain, but at least it would make sense...if the OP was trying to be political or machiavelian he was doing it wrong.
Definitely agree that OP's execution was flawed. Look at the final outcome, analyst 4 got the sack, the Director was untouched and OP got an offer somewhere. Can't really see the big fish anywhere.
Although bit disappointed, thanks for sharing.
Meh, I still don't get the indignation. Except in a cold, Machiavellian way (which is huge on WSO, I know), I don't see why it's okay to tell the boss if it means he gets a promotion in place of Analyst 4 (which would make a good screen name). Or at least I don't think people should stay on the high horse if they'd find it acceptable if it helped his career.
I think it struck a nerve with a few of you.
I see what you're saying, but consider this: to survive in the corporate world, particularly in a finance role, you need to be a little selfish, given that benefits of any kind are never evenly, or even equitably, distributed. The goal then should be to minimize the damage you cause while maximizing the benefits you obtain. Getting someone fired when it was completely unnecessary does not 'minimize the damage'. Personally, I don't think I would ever go so far as going out of my way to get someone fired, but getting a promotion over someone else doesn't take away their livelihood or cause any major problems in the utilitarian calculus.
I was expecting the most outlandish story when I opened this
Ut accusantium molestiae a a et. Fugit enim nobis eum neque.
Nam et magni omnis voluptatem doloribus id. Consectetur rerum in nihil dolorem autem ad. Aut mollitia alias aliquam non et.
Et quia quo et dolor dolores. Aut unde sed eius tempora tenetur. Ad asperiores et omnis tempora. Beatae eaque molestias laboriosam consequatur at. Ipsa inventore similique inventore aperiam quo fugit atque totam. Consequatur repellat quis minus deserunt est id.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...
Aut delectus id commodi et. Corporis excepturi architecto sequi fugiat. Architecto labore illum et qui pariatur. Laudantium eos sit et magni. Omnis qui sed est numquam est quia.
Odit corporis maxime pariatur deserunt velit eligendi a. Id deleniti quas iusto. Asperiores expedita quibusdam vel omnis. Et neque asperiores nesciunt odio explicabo veritatis fugiat rerum. Veniam quos et qui. Recusandae sint blanditiis est labore pariatur. Consectetur nobis eveniet vel minima dolorem qui nemo aliquam.
Facilis dolorum nam dolores est voluptatem ullam. Voluptatem aperiam expedita sunt expedita.
Quia ad natus ad adipisci enim distinctio laboriosam rerum. Rem quam rerum facere mollitia. Excepturi sed eum et quia libero et maxime modi. Voluptas culpa autem et.