For a long time, I wanted my life to be like Anthony Bourdain’s.
Every time I’d watch his show, “No Reservations,” in which he is essentially paid to travel the world, comment on food, drink, and culture (and generally acting like a half-drunk iconoclast while he’s at it), I’d catch myself thinking, “Man, if I could switch places with anyone else…”
Everyone has done it—we’ve all seen that person on TV (or in real life!) that we believe has everything you could ever want. And this can be a good thing or a bad thing.
It can be a bad thing because if you envy this person’s life enough, you’ll never be comfortable in your own skin as long as your life doesn’t resemble theirs. And you don’t ever want to spend your limited years trying to be somebody else.
Maybe one of your friends got that awesome-sounding front office position after recruiting is over, and you didn’t. So consciously or unconsciously, you create the image in your head that he or she has it much better than you, that they’re making much more money than you, and that every day is a nonstop party for them—forgetting of course that these jobs bring their own set of problems.
But everyone here should know that already—and if you don’t, you are not in touch with yourself personally or spiritually.
Even if you do know it, some of you will just keep right on wishing you had someone else’s life (shooting yourself in the foot in the process). So to help you out, here’s how this comparison can be a good thing.
Think about what part of this person’s life you really and truly want. Do you really want to BE them? Or do you just want what they have?
Not everyone can get paid to have their own show in which they eat, drink and travel for a living. But you don’t have to have a ton of money to do that. Anywhere I go on vacation or a weekend trip, I take time to look up restaurants, breweries, and off-the-beaten-track stuff.
Last year I took a weekend trip to another city to visit a close friend, visit the gravesite of one of my favorite writers, and enjoy a two-hour Italian lunch. As we ate and drank outside in the perfect weather, I realized I didn’t have to be Anthony Bourdain to do these things. And it sure helped not to have a large camera crew in tow!
Sam Dunn is another person whose life I wanted for a while—he’s a filmmaker who gets to travel the world, attend heavy metal concerts, and generally just experience the beauty of this music on a very personal level. But again, I didn’t have to BE him to know that I was going to drive all the way to Philadelphia to catch Black Sabbath in concert!
And when you tell those stories, you just might get a comment that you never expected to hear: “I envy your life.” The first time someone from WSO told me that, it made me be truly grateful for what I had.
By all means, be inspired by people you want to imitate on some level. But you should never really and truly want to live anyone else’s life but your own.
And if you don’t like your life, do something about it.
“Because as much as I always wanted to be Gordon Gekko….I’ll always be Bud Fox.”
How about you, dear monks? Whose life do (you think) you want? What is it about them that makes it so appealing? And how can you help yourself get there?
Bill Gate$
Rockstar. Being in the stones, GnR etc has got to be the greatest thing ever.
Always wanted to be one of the husbands on Real Housewives of New Jersey...
On a serious note, wouldn't mind switching places with Casey Anderson (National Graphic) or Rick Steeves (no thanks to his attire or glasses).
For me it's either Charlie Sheen or Mark Cuban. Sheen probably has the slight edge because he basically has no responsibilities. On the other hand, it would be fun to go head-to-head with the SEC and have unlimited legal funds with which to make them look like asshats, so advantage Cuban. Cuban has young kids, though, and that sucks donkey balls. Sheen does as well, but he apparently gives zero fucks and doesn't let them get in the way of his booze and hookers. Yeah, so I guess Sheen.
I think it's important to remember that, for the most part, you see people's highlight reels. Anthony Bourdain has an amazing job, but who knows what the rest of his life is like. Last year I found out some kid in one of my classes got a really sick SA offer at Goldman and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't envious of his life. A few months later, I found out through a mutual friend that his sister was dieing of cancer. I've learned that comparing yourself to others leaves you, many times, unhappy. I find that as long as you do your best and learn along the way, there's a lot you can be happy about.
Sting
Anthony Bourdain divorced from his first wife because of his constant travelling. Now his second wife travels with him everywhere. Two equally awful outcomes.
I think being an accomplished actor would be my pick. Sure, acting scenes is repetitive in process, and there are long days (sounds familiar), but the network and notoriety that comes with it would open nearly any door. The extended periods of downtime would allow you to pursue lots of interests/hobbies/business opportunities, and you would definitely have the cash-roll to execute them.
Lebron James. De facto best basketball player in the world, at least the second best individual basketball player ever and that gap is shrinking fast. To be the best in the world at anything is extremely rare and most likely pretty gratifying. To be the best in the history of the world... there aren't words to describe what that must be like.
Plus, he plays his (and my) favorite game and gets paid to do it.
Also, not only does his all-in compensation exceed what most finance guys only dream about, it will continue to do so since he will likely couple a 15-20 year career with sponsorship deals and sweet jobs in media, and most likely equity in any number of ventures.
Plus only Cleveland really HATES him, and a bunch of other people act like they hate him because, what, "the Decision" was just so offensive? To think that he would let people convince him to take a better job on national TV and donate all money to charity.
Haha I don't know about eggs and spoons, but basketball is not as trivial as you suggest. It has been immensely popular for over 30 years, a figure that continues to grow. Also, it's now over 120 years old. Across all levels of play around the world, basketball directly or indirectly generates billions of dollars each year.
And about being the best... how much further back can we go than 100-150 years? 150 years ago, high finance and tech didn't exist. Big money was in shipping, trains, steel, and oil. Anyone who is the best at something in these days in some measurable thing is likely not competing with anyone far enough back to satisfy your criteria for being the best I guess.
Anyway, I was merely offering my opinion. Also, Gates and Soros might be among the richest in the history of the world, and they might have been among the best at what they did. But being the best is different than being "among" the best. Maybe it's just me in my opinion, a single person being better than any other human being on planet with 6.5 billion other people is pretty special.
Guys like MJ and Lebron will be remembered differently, and more fondly perhaps, than any Slim Helu, Bill Gates, or Warren Buffett ever will.
But @Edmundo, I thought (to use your own words), "only a total shitbag bails on his kids?"
Tiger blood can do whatever he wants.
Still true, but at a certain level of wealth the rules just don't apply. His great-grandkids won't be able to spend out his estate, regardless of the level of his neglect.
And I've yet to hear anyone argue that Charlie isn't a total shitbag, so...
Wait, he's exempt from your judgment because he has a lot of money? Come on Eddie! hahaha
If you dont answer 'Host of UK Top Gear', then you are probably wrong.
This is the only right answer
Hugh Hefner
^ Yeah that's a good one. Can't imagine many people have it better than Jeremy Clarkson. That's got to be one of the best careers anyone's ever created..Celebrities like Tom Cruise and Jay Leno are even jealous of the guy
No one; there's simply no point in wanting to live someone's life without having to go through the process of getting there in the first place.
Such a beta thread
@BTBanker : Surprised?
Phil Ivey
Richard Branson
Richard Branson comes to mind
Have an island, be a billionaire and be happy as ever... Best of both worlds, hard to come by
@krauser : whatever he wants, including being a total shitbag who bails on his kids.
@Madeon's... That kid is living the dream and crushing it... Unbelievably talented!
@"Above and Beyond" are you kidding? You guys are legends... You're an inspiration
If someone said Brady4MVP, it would be someone who wants to be someone else (an HBS student). Sort of like a dream within a dream.
-- Deep thoughts by Jack Handey
I dont even care about the Monkey Shit: Patrick Bateman minus the rando killings!
Honestly I couldn't remember that comment...don't want to live anyone else's life but my own lol~
Pretty happy with where I'm at, but I second Anthony Bourdain. Not that I'd actually want to be him, necessarily. I just wish I had the time / money to travel more and it wouldn't hurt if I got paid to do it.
Larry Ellison -- 43 billions why
Mine own "Customized Life- I must have what I desire. All desires fulfilled at a button press."
George Best (RIP). Soccer/football badass.
"I spent a lot of money on booze, birds, and fast cars. The rest I just squandered."
@huanleshalemei: seems like you've already got the point.
@stvr2013: true, remember how many enemies Bourdain made after he published Kitchen Confidential. People were NOT happy!
Don Draper
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