Article - 11 Crazy Things First Year Analyst

Here's a good article written by this chick who was a "star analyst" at MS. Some harsh realities here. Also, not surprised she quit. She was a star analyst and probably not very social and not the most street smart. She gets overworked and quits. Wall Street thrives off of juicing brilliant yet stupid monkeys for all they've got and then letting them go because they don't have the client interaction skills required to bring in new business.

http://www.businessinsider.com/first-year-analyst…

 
Best Response

Did you guys even read the article? This girls sounds like a huge bitch. First slide - "Someone made a seriously offensive and ignorant racist joke". Apparently the most "seriously offensive and ignorant" racist joke she's heard recently is a stereotype that all Mexicans are named Jose or Mario. After her associate made the "joke", she reported him to HR with a negative performance review.

I wonder what she'd think about the things I'm sure get said behind her back at Morgan Stanley.

Other examples of the "crazy" (!) things she saw on Wall Street: 1.) An analyst pulled several all nighters, and due to stress, his doctor ordered that he stay home for a week. 2.) Everyone blamed all their errors on the copy center. 3.) "A rival analyst did little to no work, but schmoozed well and outperformed almost everyone" 4.) People spent money on models and bottles.

STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES - NO WAY! CRAAAAZZY!

- Capt K - "Prestige is like a powerful magnet that warps even your beliefs about what you enjoy. If you want to make ambitious people waste their time on errands, bait the hook with prestige." - Paul Graham
 
CaptK:
Did you guys even read the article? This girls sounds like a huge bitch. First slide - "Someone made a seriously offensive and ignorant racist joke". Apparently the most "seriously offensive and ignorant" racist joke she's heard recently is a stereotype that all Mexicans are named Jose or Mario. After her associate made the "joke", she reported him to HR with a negative performance review.

I wonder what she'd think about the things I'm sure get said behind her back at Morgan Stanley.

Other examples of the "crazy" (!) things she saw on Wall Street: 1.) An analyst pulled several all nighters, and due to stress, his doctor ordered that he stay home for a week. 2.) Everyone blamed all their errors on the copy center. 3.) "A rival analyst did little to no work, but schmoozed well and outperformed almost everyone" 4.) People spent money on models and bottles.

STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES - NO WAY! CRAAAAZZY!

This

http://ayainsight.co/ Curating the best advice and making it actionable.
 
CaptK:
Did you guys even read the article? This girls sounds like a huge bitch. First slide - "Someone made a seriously offensive and ignorant racist joke". Apparently the most "seriously offensive and ignorant" racist joke she's heard recently is a stereotype that all Mexicans are named Jose or Mario. After her associate made the "joke", she reported him to HR with a negative performance review.

I wonder what she'd think about the things I'm sure get said behind her back at Morgan Stanley.

Other examples of the "crazy" (!) things she saw on Wall Street: 1.) An analyst pulled several all nighters, and due to stress, his doctor ordered that he stay home for a week. 2.) Everyone blamed all their errors on the copy center. 3.) "A rival analyst did little to no work, but schmoozed well and outperformed almost everyone" 4.) People spent money on models and bottles.

STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES - NO WAY! CRAAAAZZY!

Agreed, im latin and found it just a joke, whoever finds it offensive needs to grow up!.

Valor is of no service, chance rules all, and the bravest often fall by the hands of cowards. - Tacitus Dr. Nick Riviera: Hey, don't worry. You don't have to make up stories here. Save that for court!
 
kingtut:
"An Indian woman at the firm apparently was still accustomed to the bathrooms in India, so at work, she would put her feet on the toilet seat and squat over it.

Nina heard it rumored that she was fired because she used to squat on the toilet."

There are very few better reasons to fire someone than standing on the toilet.

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford
 
happypantsmcgee:
kingtut:
"An Indian woman at the firm apparently was still accustomed to the bathrooms in India, so at work, she would put her feet on the toilet seat and squat over it.

Nina heard it rumored that she was fired because she used to squat on the toilet."

How did they find out that she squat on the toilet??

There are very few better reasons to fire someone than standing on the toilet.

 
kingtut:
"An Indian woman at the firm apparently was still accustomed to the bathrooms in India, so at work, she would put her feet on the toilet seat and squat over it.

Nina heard it rumored that she was fired because she used to squat on the toilet."

LMAO..... Hahahahaha

Let's make better mistakes tomorrow
 

Sunt autem iste ea veniam aut natus voluptas. Nemo qui ad provident et recusandae a architecto. Et ipsum recusandae et nulla veritatis expedita doloribus.

Vitae qui possimus dolor nisi aliquid quidem omnis. Voluptatem reprehenderit est et fuga corrupti. Eveniet sed magnam error.

Ad porro magni culpa nostrum reprehenderit corrupti. Voluptas et quis voluptas et. Sed et officia exercitationem doloremque est consequatur id. Voluptates nostrum alias natus vel eos quia possimus.

Cupiditate ut illo quae nulla. Adipisci aut dolor numquam nihil. Assumenda blanditiis voluptates placeat.

 

Sed non aut in iste autem modi aliquid. Provident incidunt consequuntur est ipsam corrupti ea. Perferendis cupiditate illum quia.

Illum molestiae eius voluptates esse non sunt. Labore iure distinctio accusamus aut omnis impedit. Vel autem vitae cum libero iusto. Sed iste reiciendis nihil temporibus.

Aliquid consectetur corrupti id quidem molestias porro quos. Totam ipsum et enim quaerat aut vitae. Accusamus et aut quia labore optio asperiores. Odio ratione doloribus quo ducimus velit.

Career Advancement Opportunities

April 2024 Investment Banking

  • Jefferies & Company 02 99.4%
  • Goldman Sachs 19 98.8%
  • Harris Williams & Co. New 98.3%
  • Lazard Freres 02 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 03 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

April 2024 Investment Banking

  • Harris Williams & Co. 18 99.4%
  • JPMorgan Chase 10 98.8%
  • Lazard Freres 05 98.3%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.7%
  • William Blair 03 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

April 2024 Investment Banking

  • Lazard Freres 01 99.4%
  • Jefferies & Company 02 98.8%
  • Goldman Sachs 17 98.3%
  • Moelis & Company 07 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 05 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

April 2024 Investment Banking

  • Director/MD (5) $648
  • Vice President (19) $385
  • Associates (87) $260
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (14) $181
  • Intern/Summer Associate (33) $170
  • 2nd Year Analyst (66) $168
  • 1st Year Analyst (205) $159
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (146) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
3
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
4
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
99.0
5
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
6
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
7
kanon's picture
kanon
98.9
8
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
9
Linda Abraham's picture
Linda Abraham
98.8
10
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”