how does he have balls? there's no consequences for him, as he can just slide back into oblivion. he's just a massive douche with too much time on his hands speculating and giving advice to people his own age.

 

GameTheory, he also regurgitated the stuff I wrote. That always irked me.

Hopefully this won't reflect poorly on the actual analysts on this board. We're here to talk to each other, help out the aspiring monkeys, and blow off some steam.

 

Oh wait I just read the other thread it he is a JUNIOR at a NON IVY TARGET!!!!! (well, I went to Michigan but I'm an engineer so that's fine!)

Dude, I am a woman banker, and nothing says LOSER like a guy who lies about what he does, how he looks, or $$$......good luck my friend, you are going to be a 40 yr old born again virgin!

Run home to mommy and have her tuck you in, you frankly deserve a spanking!

 

ChemEtoVC... may I eat you out? I'm not talking about Dan Bush "don't know what I'm doing" sex, I'm talking about literally wasting some time orgasmic dynamite sex, something you never ever experienced before.

 

why is it only the college kids that are epimping left and right all the women. First Dan, then wasting. Have some respect guys.

I mean come on guys you have access to all the fresh young talent all over you on campus...go make them uncomfortable by following them around campus saying things like "hey baby you got a nice ass"...instead of making them uncomfortable here.

do you honestly think the older women on this board are interested in immature kids?

 

Well I guess I am flattered Wasting Time and granted that particular activity is one of my favorite passtimes, I'm afraid I am not on the market at the moment!

Oh, and no I am not uncomfortable.....TRY to offend me!!!

 

Aspiringmonkey, i don't want to take the spotlight off Dan, but need I point out that you are also a college student who is well on his way to 500 posts?

Like the other "aspiring bankers" here, you should be taking advice.. not giving it out.

 

well unlike dan, everyone knows I'm a college student, so my advice is taken with a grain of truth.

And I dunno about you but I've researched Ibanking quiet extensively, and yes I may have 400 posts...but I can give advice just like others on things I know about. And things I don't know about I ask.

And I'm sure others don't want to wait for 12 hours before an actual ibanker gets on and gives their view point on something thats more or less common knowledge, such as gpa questions etc.

p.s. dan stop with the lying everyone knows you are a liar, so you are just like the guy who altered his gpa and got caught

 

found a quote dan/aleksey posted back in september.

"Its now 8:30pm and I've been toiling all day and night on something given to me yesterday at 2am. To all the ladies around, what is the best way to solicit action? Do you just approach a girl and be frank, or do you start on a different path?"

its hilarious on so many levels. one being that he made up the fact that he was a current analsyt. havent seen many things more pathetic than that. and he proceeds to ask about picking up chicks. what a loser!

its fun searching comments he's made where's he lying/sounding stupid. we should have a quote finding contest

 

o lets leave the poor guy alone... it is obvious that he is the kid, while writing posts about being an ib analyst or selling his "paint company," is sitting in front of his computer screen in absolute tears because he is the only one who really knows just how pathetic he is.

 
hoyer:
... because he is the only one who really knows just how pathetic he is.

No, he is not the only one that really knows.

He's proven himself an idiot for several years (legacy Vault).

 

Dan, get a fucking life. You are the BIGGEST fucking nerd/geek/dork I have EVER seen! This brings me back to my days, I have a WONDERFUL locker to put you in, Aleksey!

Hahaha, I wonder how long it will take you to get laid! YOU SUCK ASS, GEEK!

 
Greedy Gilmore:
Dan, get a fucking life. You are the BIGGEST fucking nerd/geek/dork I have EVER seen! This brings me back to my days, I have a WONDERFUL locker to put you in, Aleksey!

Hahaha, I wonder how long it will take you to get laid! YOU SUCK ASS, GEEK!

who is this guy? ive never even heard of him before. get used to that feeling, as the rest of ur pathetic life will be that way. fucking trailer trash ass fuck.

 
Dan Bush:
Your words are representative of your personality. You are one of the cool kids on the message board. I wish I was you. Because you are perfect and you are the man.

Go back to popping roids and listening to your Phil Collins homo-fag music.

 

I keep this post alive. Over half of the post originations are mine. Also, the past three polls were engendered b/c of my posts. So if you dont like me, you would be better served just leaving the board. Otherwise keep your mouth shut. Thank you very much. Have a pleaseant evening.

 

Also, what is it with gay guys being a bad thing? Only one of the guys in my group is gay and I was just bemoaning that fact the other day. Not only is he a better dresser, he's got a better attitude and doesn't feel the need to engage in all the posturing that goes on among the straight guys.

I at least wish that more of the straight guys would act like the gay guy. Some days I just want to say, "Metrosexual, dude, have you heard of it? Please trim your nose hair, change your shirt every day, stop throwing pizza crusts on the floor, and stop scratching your balls. Thank you."

 

Dan, you are probably a balding, fat slob. I think you post all this shit about how you are huge and built because you are so embarrassed of your weight in real life.

This would also help to answer why you can never seem to satisfy your sexual partners (see this thread: http://www.ibankingoasis.com/node/785 for reference). When you get on top of them, you suffocate them with one of your many belly folds causing them to pass out. By the time you are done and they wake up, they have no idea what took place during the past 30 seconds.

So to summarize, Dan Bush = Fat Bastard. Cue the lame comebacks!

 

ur right flashbang. i am fat. i persistently lie on this message board to talk to people like you. why cant u just leave me alone? why must you always talk with or about me? you are obesssed with me and it is getting pretty bad. just leave me alone. thank you. bye.

 

it is one thing to have a lively debate. it is another thing to have people tell you that you are something you are not. i dont go around calling people fat and gay because they like phil collins music. i would just like zala, wastingtime, and flashbang to leave me alone.

 
Dan Bush:

well good for you. real men make things happen from their comments. i still waiting for your words to come to fruition.

Real men can also satisfy their sexual partners. Guess you're out.

Besides, I don't see why you feel your posts are so good. Most of your threads/posts are about retarded topics. A few examples:

  • Why people should not buy fake clothes/watches/whatever
  • Why female bankers are bad at sex
  • % of your firm on cocaine
  • Kudlow and Company
  • Zala sucks
  • Zala isn't such a bad guy
  • Zala sucks (again)

Real quality stuff, Dan. You have single-handedly managed to destroy the signal to noise ratio here. Way to go.

 
Dan Bush:
you must be a real loser. who finds people's posts and posts them? when you get out of college give me a call. ill make sure you dont get hired.

Finds your posts? Your shitty posts are littered all over this fucking board.

 

I don't get why people talk about Dan Bush, Zala and RogueBanker all the time.

I think Dan is slightly outspoken, good for the forum. Zala can be rude at times, but i do sense the flair of intelligence from him at times.

When you guys say "the real deal" what do you mean? are you saying that all Bankers should be outspoken, rude, smart, not much patience and often sexist?

 

Eligendi et nulla quos natus quidem. Veritatis omnis impedit et id. Itaque voluptatem quia et maxime sunt est dolore. Et rerum et est sint incidunt labore. Repellendus ut aut minima atque aut voluptatem.

Ea dignissimos alias quisquam est dolor excepturi. Aut in sint consequatur soluta culpa in distinctio. Et in quasi nesciunt quia tempore. Omnis delectus et ea dicta qui et. Quibusdam asperiores rerum amet minus quod illum modi. Optio tenetur vitae eaque odio sed veritatis et.

Laudantium veniam aut perferendis iure. Perspiciatis enim corrupti doloremque ut ad sit. Quibusdam aut esse eum et laboriosam dolorem voluptas. Sed dicta perspiciatis autem. Autem sed rerum eius nihil eos adipisci provident.

 

Commodi id quis neque expedita ipsum perspiciatis fuga. Dicta voluptate alias suscipit cumque odit iste. Voluptatibus alias exercitationem quia occaecati optio quia sit est.

Nulla nostrum ea occaecati ea. Rerum id maxime voluptas dolorum impedit sunt eveniet ducimus. Voluptate reiciendis mollitia accusantium. Consectetur expedita nihil magni nisi. Iure qui veniam voluptates iusto.

 

Error totam illum sed similique rerum molestiae accusantium. Accusantium beatae ipsa voluptatem quia velit blanditiis laboriosam et. Laboriosam sit in molestiae. Soluta debitis sint assumenda quidem cupiditate ut. Ut voluptas nam dolor similique sit. Odit nemo ex iure rerum eaque voluptatem. Animi id earum placeat ut temporibus.

Beatae voluptatem facere consectetur autem ducimus quos. Adipisci et et aut nostrum. Et expedita neque quod molestias facilis aut. Ad non quas dolores consequatur asperiores.

Illum odit velit et sunt. Dolores molestias harum mollitia eligendi et. Sit itaque animi vero est molestias voluptas.

 

Enim debitis esse debitis fugit itaque natus. Quia optio similique nam expedita est. Et animi sequi iste fugiat. Non exercitationem repellat rerum ut repellat. Voluptatem rerum numquam magnam sunt quia alias. Sint dolor beatae adipisci voluptatem. Officiis sit aut rerum aut molestiae modi.

 

Molestias nihil quo consequuntur. Quo placeat saepe mollitia beatae ut. Iure commodi exercitationem eos eligendi. Voluptatem sunt error fugit facere exercitationem sit aliquid. Repellat explicabo suscipit voluptate sunt.

Laborum modi ipsa laudantium ea. Ut iste voluptate quis quas sint sunt quas. Aut ab minima et odio. Molestiae atque voluptas occaecati quaerat cum. Voluptas nihil et accusamus asperiores distinctio.

Sed qui ut occaecati id. Ea expedita numquam enim vel rem deserunt aut.

Career Advancement Opportunities

April 2024 Investment Banking

  • Jefferies & Company 02 99.4%
  • Goldman Sachs 19 98.8%
  • Harris Williams & Co. New 98.3%
  • Lazard Freres 02 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 03 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

April 2024 Investment Banking

  • Harris Williams & Co. 18 99.4%
  • JPMorgan Chase 10 98.8%
  • Lazard Freres 05 98.3%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.7%
  • William Blair 03 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

April 2024 Investment Banking

  • Lazard Freres 01 99.4%
  • Jefferies & Company 02 98.8%
  • Goldman Sachs 17 98.3%
  • Moelis & Company 07 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 05 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

April 2024 Investment Banking

  • Director/MD (5) $648
  • Vice President (19) $385
  • Associates (86) $261
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (14) $181
  • Intern/Summer Associate (33) $170
  • 2nd Year Analyst (66) $168
  • 1st Year Analyst (205) $159
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (145) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
3
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
4
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
99.0
5
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
6
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
7
kanon's picture
kanon
98.9
8
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
9
Linda Abraham's picture
Linda Abraham
98.8
10
numi's picture
numi
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”