Best Response

Add interests at the bottom (fly fishing etc.). It may sound unnecessary, but people like a well-rounded (real) person who does have hobbies (and this is in addition to your activities). If you do any sports (specifically at varsity level), ABSOLUTELY list them. Bankers love athletes!!!

Your education part seems a bit short (do you have any awards, like Deans List etc.?). Also, if you had a very good GPA in high school (ideally higher than your current, because it's high school), I would add two lines for high school (again, maybe with superb awards). High schools sometimes rank as well, so if you're like top 5/10%, I would add that (banks like seeing hard evidence that you are successful).

Also, your virtual stock market competition doesn't tell me much. So you made $10,000 in profit. That's great, but were you working with a $1million portfolio (in which case this is a shitty return) or did you start with $10,000? It's good to give a percentage return, otherwise this tells me nothing. Also, would be good to compare to what the market return was over that period. (The same applies to your $1million return in the other experience part)

Lastly, and this bothered me a bit, it seems that you never had any experience that either lasted more than a week or wasn't virtual. (Your blocked out information may say something else, so I might be wrong on this). Are you doing an internship right now (I hope so!)? Make sure to show that you did something that lasted at least a month or so.

This may sound harsh, but you're asking people to point out the faults...so there you go. Btw, StockTrak lists your your score, like what Sharpe ratio you had, return etc. (It sometimes even compares ranking to other groups), so would be wise to add that.

 

I removed some stuff like Honors and Interests because I didnt really have much more space. I'll make more changes and add stuff back later on. And thats most of my financial experience so far because I didnt get an internship this summer. I'll add more info about the stock results.

Do you have any more suggestions?

 

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