Jan 26, 2011

Please review resume: business graduate with research and consulting experience

Hi,

I am a business grad with some experience in research and consulting. I have moved to Asia and am looking to enter the finance industry. Specifically, I am looking to enter into equity research, m&a, or IPO advisory (areas I feel my research experience is related).

I have had positive reviews from friends and families, but because I have had no interviews with financial companies to date, I feel that I am doing something wrong. Please review my resume, and harsh criticism will be much appreciated!

Thank you in advance!

Resume: http://www.razume.com/documents/18578

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4 Comments

O

13y

Best Response

While funding education BY working xx
I don't know how I feel about your education section format. It is non-traditional, and though it is not bad, it could throw some people off. Think about changing to conventional.
Does "core" GPA mean cumulative? If yes, change to cumulative. If not and cumulative is worse, leave as is.
Carried out research and analysis functions for the xx department - poor grammar. Is it "carried out [research and analysis] functions" which is bad or is it "carried out research and [analysis functions]" which is still poor. Rephrase.
"Compiled statistical data ... and was used as the first topic of focus at .." sounds like YOU were the first topic of focus.
I suggest not using "advanced" next to Excel models.
Semicolon at the end of first Deloitte bullet?
YOU WERE WORKING 3 JOBS FROM JANUARY TO APRIL OF 2010??? AND YOU WERE IN SCHOOL??? When I realized this, 90% of credibility just went out the window. I realize it may be true but until I saw this I thought you were full time. Now I think you tricked me. [reviewers might think this, so be careful. however, I can't suggest a better alternative.]
Performed statistical analysis .... to use for evaluating .... This is wrong grammatically, and very hard to follow. Rephrase into 2 sentences, or get rid of fluff.
"to find solutions for improving data integrity" You find solution to a problem. Improving data integrity is not a problem. Poor data integrity is a problem. Replace solutions with "methods" or something similar.
Daily operation OF [instead of for] data warehouse.
NEVER write "developed excel formulas" - you sound like an idiot. Unless you wrote your own custom formulas in VBA, in which case I still wouldn't mention it.
What is the point of "for any period of time of the year"? Sentence would be clearer without this.

You are welcome.

?

13y

I have never considered #8 the way you put it out, which makes sense. My last year was pretty lax, so I used it to gain work experience. They were all part time, but I ended up working six to seven days in aggregate. I was hoping to use this example to demonstrate my ability to prioritize/ work hard, etc. I will re-think this part or perhaps omit one of the work experiences.

Also, thanks for pointing out my "excel" flaws. Never really noticed how "extremely competent" I put myself out to be. Come to think of it, if an interviewer asked me Q's about 'advanced' excel, I would probably get owned.

I will also re-vamp my cover letter to take out the fluffiness

Thanks!

?

13y

Hi,

I posted up a second version. Reviews are appreciated!

http://www.razume.com/documents/18598

Thanks!

Economist Roles

O

13y

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