How to Renege (Gracefully)

Fin123:

Did you work in NYC office of the Big 4 firm this past summer?

No. We'll leave it at that, but it was in a different city.

Gekko21:

Some good advice has been given in older threads.

Short version. be honest that you are taking another offer, but don't give too many specifics.

don't tell the bank that you are reneging to join them.

Thanks Gekko21. I went through as many of the advice as I could on the site with a time stamp in the past year, and thanks again for helping me out. I think this is the second time you've answered my question regarding this specific matter.

powertime:

Did this exact same thing a year ago. Call and say you wont be coming because you have an opportunity that is more in line with your interests. It will be an awkward phone call though. They asked for the company and job type etc. I only really told them it was in finance and everything worked out fine.

It really means a lot to hear from someone who went through the same process. Thanks Powertime!

runner99:

just tell them you've dropped out of college and aren't getting your degree. Or that you've decided to join a cult instead. Or tell them that you need to renegotiate your salary and offer an absurd figure. When they angrily refuse, insult their self-worth and inform them that you won't work for meager wages like a common college grad.

Haha, I wish I had the balls to do that. Though chances are they're going to call my career center (who are not going to be happy about this), and then find out I'm not part of some cult or something or other.

Financetherapist:

Dude, think about it this way. Unless your becoming their CEO or somemore other high ranking position. They probably don't care since this isn't the first time it's happened. We like to think we're important, but in reality there are probably a whole bunch of people from some other company or school that can take your place. Just tell that your going to one of the BIG 4, and wish them luck.

You're absolutely right. I'm just trying to play out all the scenarios in my head right now.

Sorry about the long post, but everyone has posted some great comments, and I wanted to address everyone. My current strategy is the following:

Wait for my contract to arrive from the IB, and then call the big 4 firm.

Just tell him you made a rash decision and you are now contemplating on leaving the industry.

he'll never know better. if he finds out you decided to come back to finance, tell him you changed your mind a week later and you wanted to come back to finance.

Just say you've really appreciated his help over the past few months, how he's given you some valuable insight into the industry, but that after weighing your options carefully and talking it over with your family, you've decided to go another route. Much less risky, really no need to lie here. If you said that you were leaving the industry after he spent a while helping you out and giving you tips, he might feel like he's been wasting his time. Just be genuine about it.

Just say no.

I think you owe him a call, less chance of you coming off as a dick.

Consider doing this over the phone if you actually have a personal rapport with the guy. Email can be quite impersonal and it's easy to misconstrue things when the human element is absent ... typed text is a terrible medium sometimes.

As others have said, simply paint a picture that this was a long, drawn out, well researched, and thoughtful decision, not something rash or hasty. Involve family, professors, and your career center if you feel you need to make things sound more credible, but don't burn a bridge you have with anyone personally.

Do a search on the board. This is discussed in detail and you will see many perspectives.

Search "reneging". There are >100 and

Stop calling it contract. It's not a contract and has no legal binding power

"Should I tell them I'm going to a hf or make up some b/s excuse (going back to my home country for personal reasons, sickness in the family, got my g/f pregnant so I now want a 9-5 job, etc.)"

I hope you're not serious.

Why not just tell them you will not be joining their firm. If they ask why, tell them you decided to go with a HF. If they ask who, say you do not feel comfortable sharing that information.

"got my g/f pregnant so I now want a 9-5 job"

HAHAHAHA!

Congrats on your options. Here are my opinions:

Always try to maintain a relationship. They may kick you in the face for trying, but that's their right. (If they're smart, they won't, because you never know who you're going to meet in some client's conference room five years down the road.)

To that end, definitely position it as something you're considering. That gives them an out to say, "Yes, we want you to do what's right for you," and then wipe their brows if they've been sweating over having made too many offers. This has happened twice in the last year at my firm, and both times we let them out gracefully with an open door to return. This is a valuable option that they wouldn't have had if they'd given it to us straight. (If they won't let you consider it, or act offended, then you might have to get a tad tougher.)

Also to that end, I don't think a little white lie is beyond the pale. I hear it from time to time, sometimes even before we make a real offer: "Oh, my mother won't let me move out of state." "I suddenly have an incurable disease." "My girlfriend just got her dream job in London so I'm moving there with her and we're getting married." (Not kidding on any of these.) I know they're not all true, but I don't want to spend too much time delving. The kids reneged. Fine. One moves on.

You also shouldn't hide behind HR. You should deliver the information to the highest appropriate person with whom you've had personal contact... and if it's an email, just CC the HR person.

Don't feel bad. Business is business, both from the firm's point of view and yours. You gotta look out for number one.

Just be honest with the situation is the best way to go. They are not hung up on you as much as you may think.

There is simply someone else who will take your slot in 2 seconds.

Keep the relationship open if you can. What you show is your responsible and a person a lot of firms want.

Get it done and move on with your life.

Call and ask: - what the maximum penalty is for ill-use of insider info? - what type of confidential information will you have access to? - what is the average time lapse between you finding out about a deal and it becoming public information - what is the firms policy on using personal mass-storage devices at work (USB drive, external hard-drive)

Should do the trick. If they still dont bite, ask the HR chick what color panties she's wearing.... or better yet, female MD/VP.

it's unclear from the post if you've just gotten an offer, or if you've accepted and are now going to reneg.

first, what s&t desk were you on and what does your fund do? ie are you going to be covered by your former colleagues?

either way, call them and say thanks but no thanks. and leave it there.

.

"At this point in the game, why wouldn't you have already signed the docs?"

God bless at will employment.

and it's so nice how all the responses are so ethical. practically though, here is how it works:

1) just call BB and tell them you're not taking 2) fill out HF form appropriately; put whatever reference you want 3) background check: they will contact the reference and ask if you've worked there, and for how long; if the other party says too much, they run the risk of being sued for slander (remember, they don't know who is authorizing the check); check the books on this one if you want; i can give you links supporting it 4) no one ends up giving a *&^( about some 22 year old reneging an offer, and you get to live on happily, becoming the millionaire you were destined to be

i know it seems scary now, but you just have to think logically, and get some insight on how the process works; i know people who have started job mentioning employment on their resume that isn't valid--> THIS is risky. what you're doing has no real inherent risk within it to be risky.

hope this helps

"everyone above is in college"

no i'm not

If I recall correctly from a prior post, the OP explicitly told the HF on a number of occasions during his interview that he hadn't verbally accepted any offers (although he obviously had).

Nothing illegal about this, but it could certainly raise some eyebrows with folks at the hedge fund.

That is, assuming the HF learns during his background check that he lied about already having accepted an offer during his interview, since he spent last summer as an intern at the same BB.

FYI... I had a friend, Pat, who accepted with a BB. Then ended up interviewing for a far better position through a connection (connection worked in hiring group). After all rounds of interviews, they had kind of a sell-lunch. At which point, being only around analysts/assoc, Pat for reasons beyond my comprehension told them that he/she had accepted with XYZ BB. The result?

Auto-ding.

After, the connection told Pat that the group liked him/her but the reneg-factor really left a bad taste in their mouth and they had trouble believing he/she wouldn't do the same to them if a better opportunity presented itself.

Pat has since returned to his/her career frequenting on SNL.

Karma is gonna get ya

Why not go with both excuses?

Seems like they'd be more effective if used together.

"My goal here is to minimize the chances that people at the BB will actively try to sabotage my chances at the HF"

does this even make sense? how is this possible? why would anyone care whether you joined or not after like the first minute they're told you're reneging? i know i wouldn't, no matter how much i liked you; it was just a summer. the only ppl that would care are HR, and obviously you don't care what they think, i would imagine?

also, any background check can only verify: did you work here, and for how long (unless you give someone from there personally as a reference, but i wouldn't think you would need to do that for undergrad recruiting)

i guess i'm just confused; and i don't say that to be mean, but i'm just unsure why you would be worried by this? i really hope you figure out your situation, and best of luck

Yes, as unprofessional as it is to actively try to fuck over someone who reneges, I wouldn't put it beyond some people to actually try it.

i'm coming a little late to the party on this thread, but i think that you might as well just be fairly honest with the guys on your old desk. tell them that you loved working with them etc, but that a phenomenal offer has somehow landed on your desk and that you feel it's in your best interest to take it. if you want ot add a white lie, here's the place to do it - come up with some reason the HF job is better - ie, my mom is sick and i've been given the opportunity to work closer to home and stay in finance, so i feel i have ot do this etc etc etc. lie about WHY the hedge fund job is more appealing to you, if you just straight up tell them it's a better offer it insults their egos and that's when you have to worry about them screwing you over. in terms of your motivation - that's also something that's a lot easier to lie about as it's personal and it's not really like htey can do a background check regarding those issues. thank them for their understanding and keep in touch with them, try to keep the relationships warm - you never know when you'll need them again, esp in this climate. that's just my .02 though.