University sucks

I am at a non-target uni doing a pretty tough major with very realistic hopes of doing a masters at a world class university.

I have done two years at this university and have a year remaining.

I am really really unhappy at this university. So far I have hated every single day I have attended this university. The first year was horrible and I kinda got minor depression. I nearly dropped out. I genuinely made an effort in the second year but that did not go to plan.

I am grateful that I got a place here in the first place . I really want to be happy here and I have tried. My summer holidays end in about two weeks and I am dreading to go back. I just can not be fucked. This place is a constant reminder that I am a failure and nothing has gone to plan with regards to my studies and everything else. Looks like this is not going to change.

Any advice? Anyone ever been in a situation?

 

Funny, I've been contemplating writing a post for WSO titled: "Have fun with it." I do believe I will begin typing it up.

You need to identify why you are unhappy and either change those things, change your outlook or both. If all else fails... see a doctor and start popping xanax like tic tacs (totally kidding). You are young, surrounded by tons of girls waiting to get pounded and you are near one of the coolest cities on the planet (London). From reading your other posts you seem motivated to succeed, though I'd tell anyone to strive for the highest grades they can.

Don't take this the wrong way, but there are many on this board who have experienced some dour times. You've got it pretty good all things considered. You aren't folding shirts to get by, you are in school working hard to make something out of yourself. This reminds me of people who get depressed because they are on Facebook where people only post the best moments of their lives so the rest looks kind of shitty by comparison.

I'd give quite a bit of money to go back to being young and getting shut down time and time again in my pursuit of pussy. But really, at what point in your life can 50% of your day be devoted to chasing down pussy and not having to worry about HR?

 

How true. I'd like to hear your post. I can't complain about my life, I had an awesome 20's (not Vinny Chase awesome but cool) and have had a good life since (like everyone it's not all roses) but I fucking loved college. I do not understand how people don't like college for all of your reasons above. It astounds me. And I worked 30 hours per week and double majored so I wasn't sitting around doing nothing constantly.

 
ArcherVice:

You are young, surrounded by tons of girls waiting to get pounded...

[quote=Matrick][in reply to Tony Snark"]Why aren't you blogging for WSO and become the date doctor for WSO? There seems to be demand. [/quote] [quote=BatMasterson][in reply to Tony Snark's dating tip] Sensible advice.[/quote]
 

I graduated from college during the financial crisis, and had about 2 years of constant job/internship hunting stress my junior and senior year, and failed at obtaining my goal job (front office IB). You can probably find my stressed out posts on here from back. I'll just say that, everything ends up working out and my early and mid 20's were awesome. I had a lot of fun in college, but honestly I had more fun the first few years after college since I actually had money and weekends were completely free.

 
Best Response

I really really really want to just say "suck it up, you've got a lot going for you, college is awesome, blahblahblah" and all of that's true, but I'll come at this from a different angle, try to give some tangible things you can do to help. it's a given that college is hard, and it's a different time in your life, not everyone adjusts well and not everyone gets help. I had a typical college experience: non-target, parties, frat, sports, job, classes, goofing off, not a lot of girls had a steady girlfriend and she's a hard 9.5, so I'm not complaining; I say this knowing that what I say may not resonate with you if you're not that type, but bear with me.

I agree with @"ArcherVice" you need to change your outlook and isolate your stressors. this can be tricky but just try to stop every time you notice your mood snaps to either anger or sadness. what happened? who was around? what were you doing? it could be a number of things, but until you figure that out, you can't do anything about it, so that's #1. if you're sad all of the time (and be honest with yourself, I mean really sad, not just kinda blah), it could be your social circle (or lack thereof), consider new friends/more friends. you could also miss your family, how far away is your family now versus your first university? nothing wrong with not wanting to leave home, but you need to identify the stressor before you can mitigate its impact.

after you've identified what's causing this, it's time to change your outlook. plenty of techniques out there, but start reading positive psychology books. they are cheesy, but they will help. the happiness advantage is a personal favorite, but there's plenty of others. one technique that helped me is to make a T chart where everything positive about a situation is on one side and the negative is on the other. when you force yourself to think of all of the positive things about something/your life, it makes it easier to think that way and be happier most of the time. this is not suggesting you start looking at the window as a magical beautiful creation of God Almighty through the wondrous romance of Silicon and Oxygen atoms, it's suggesting you don't sweat the small stuff.

some other short term things that could help:

  1. get laid on a regular basis. and I mean good sex, not some dumpster fire. plenty of posts on how to get game.

  2. play sports/games, something competitive. does a lot for your mood, and if you're not a sore loser, it will be fun regardless

  3. exercise. endorphins baby, they're a great thing, plus it does a lot for happiness if you look in the mirror and see a nice body

  4. travel/vacation. sometimes life gets tough, you need to get away from it for a while (even if it's just a couple of days, I think at least 3, but no more than 8 or 9 unless you can afford it). if you don't go on holiday elsewhere in Europe, go somewhere off the grid. if you're adventurous, go alone, spend some time in nature, in solitude, bring a book, a journal, and a camera. there's a lot of self discovery you can experience when you're at peace and in isolation.

  5. write more. sometimes it helps to get stuff off your chest, even if it's never available to WSO or anyone for that matter. when you write something down I feel like it's no longer stressing your brain to keep it there, because it's documented, and if it's something stressful, sometimes when you write it out, you discover ways to cope/fix.

best of luck dude.

 

Hey OP, I don't think you have it as bad from me. I'm going to graduate next year from a university in Romania with no internships or work experience. I said that's not bad, if you study and get a high GPA and high gmat score you can apply to good universities. It just so happens that the criteria to be admitted to the programs I want require math and programming experience.So that's that.

For those interested my degree is in Finance-Banking and the graduate programs I want to apply for are Financial engineering or Mathematical and computational finance.

 

all the pussy you could eat, all the beer you could drink, awesome friends, hall pass on most crazy hijinks and my favorite, tons of foreign girls who have never been outside daddy's home and you are complaining? honestly it sounds like you are going in with the wrong attitude. A break from school into the real world or travelling might be an option to get things into focus. Some people never leave university for a reason.

 

Wow, what I would do to be in your shoes, back in school with tons of educated girls my age. School is a breeze compared to FT work (especially if you’re going for IB). If I were you, I would take thebroprofessor's advice: especially 2 and 3. Exercising daily and participating competitive sports can change your outlook on life drastically. When I was in school, I would workout daily. With my immense workload and my uber competitive school environment, I pretty much had to or I’d start feeling depressed and overwhelmed. Plus, going 2 & 3 will help with 1. Girls are attracted to happy, confident, fit dudes not crybaby, emo betas.

I'm bi-winning. I win here, and I win there.
 

OP, if college is this bad how are you going to survive in the real world.

[quote=Matrick][in reply to Tony Snark"]Why aren't you blogging for WSO and become the date doctor for WSO? There seems to be demand. [/quote] [quote=BatMasterson][in reply to Tony Snark's dating tip] Sensible advice.[/quote]
 

That's an inaccurate characterization of the posters and their responses in this thread. I also know the OP has reached out and received advice/encouragement beyond this thread regarding his current situation and career.

 

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heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/

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