Why YOU Aren't Getting Offers
I have been meaning to post something regarding this topic for some time, even though it has been covered to the point of exhaustion. My final breaking point was about 2 weeks ago, when I had the unfortunate experience of riding the train from Stamford to NYC (a commute I am too used to dating to my IB and hedge fund days and have sworn off for life). Regardless, as my crackberry session commenced upon being seated in the sweatbox, an important phone call came through from a portfolio company who I happen to sit on the board of. During the call, I noticed the young Indian kid next to me spring up at the chance to listen to the call – which he surprisingly let me finish.
I also give the kid credit for attempting to turn this into a networking opportunity (which I would gladly accept) had he not wanted to make me throw myself under the moving train – a feat unaccomplished until meeting this lad. The following chain of events is why he and so many young monkeys on this forum (who go to Ivey, have internships, solid grades, whatever else) are not getting jobs:
• He assumed because he went to Yale, he deserved an IB career (he basically said this)
• He was wearing a suit that had pants with zippers for pockets (obviously this fucker hasn’t read the 20,000 posts on “how to dress for an interview” – I would auto ding this kid even if he was Summa @ HBS for such a fashion faux pas.
• He focused on nothing but EXIT OPPS (which began to make my blood boil). Upon our discussion where he has interviewed and where he was going to be interviewing (which I could have been a HUGE asset on both prep and recommendations) his only questions related to where it would get him after. WSO – top exits opps will be available to a sample size of any year’s analyst class (and as the wonderful recent PE thread has addressed, it ain’t all that great kiddies).
• He was as stale as a 4 year old Triscuit in the August sun in Tuscon, AZ. Bring something to the table, I don’t care if all you can do is crank a DCF – any moron can do this.
• He could not speak to his strengths
• He could not tell his story
• He knew nothing about the bank he was going to
• He knew nothing about the market
• He did nothing but ANNOY me – asking dumb questions, ranting about DCF calculations when he was actually fucking wrong, and did not take the time to pick my brain, someone who has gone the path he is attempting and succeeded (and he knew MY story quickly because I know how to tell it).
Monkeys, bottom line – if you have the tangibles required for banking / finance in general and are still not receiving offers (whether FT or SA) you are lacking the intangibles. I know many people on this forum say all they want is an excel machine, but there is much more to banking – and finance for that matter. Take a step back, and really examine your process thus far if you are without an offer.
This is my rant for the week. Thoughts / Comments?
JD






haha good read, and I assume
haha good read, and I assume you are right, I have met so many people with such attitude. I have put a lot of effort and research into my past job hunt which spanned over years and eventually was successful. I also think that once you have the tangibles its really all about intangibles and most of the people I know that broke into finance were just extremly good on the later (also coming from non-targets etc. this makes them hungry in that sense)
+1 SB to you
"too good to be true"
See my WSO Blog
I go to a target for most
I go to a target for most banks and I have a killer GPA. I basically deserve an IB career. So what if I wear my diamond studded platinum rolex to an interview?
Do I even bother to keep up with the market? Of course not. I'm in college and I shouldn't be bothered with silly things like reading the Wallstreet Journal. Why does my story suck? Because its boring as shit. I'm from CT, went to a prep school and then an ivy. Why finance? Well I didn't want to be a surgeon or a lawyer, so I guess Wallstreet is the only option left.
Isn't the whole point of banking to get barely enough experience to make you qualified for top HF/PE firms?
fartmouth wrote: I go to a
I go to a target for most banks and I have a killer GPA. I basically deserve an IB career. So what if I wear my diamond studded platinum rolex to an interview?
Do I even bother to keep up with the market? Of course not. I'm in college and I shouldn't be bothered with silly things like reading the Wallstreet Journal. Why does my story suck? Because its boring as shit. I'm from CT, went to a prep school and then an ivy. Why finance? Well I didn't want to be a surgeon or a lawyer, so I guess Wallstreet is the only option left.
Isn't the whole point of banking to get barely enough experience to make you qualified for top HF/PE firms?
As long as you don't have zipper pockets on your suit, I don't give a shit what watch you are wearing.
"Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"
Definitely sad to see people
Definitely sad to see people like that somehow still manage to get offers while others (myself included, from non-targets) have to put ourselves out there and sell the shit out of that story like you wouldn't believe. On top of that, you have to deal with questions like "Why should I hire you from so and so non-target when I can get [insert douche bag kid here] from so and so ivy. Thanks for this post, going forward, will have a much better answer to that question... it reads: NO.SENSE.OF.ENTITLEMENT.WILLING.TO.WORK.MY.ASS.OFF.WILLING.TO.LEARN.
JimmyDormandy
I go to a target for most banks and I have a killer GPA. I basically deserve an IB career. So what if I wear my diamond studded platinum rolex to an interview?
Do I even bother to keep up with the market? Of course not. I'm in college and I shouldn't be bothered with silly things like reading the Wallstreet Journal. Why does my story suck? Because its boring as shit. I'm from CT, went to a prep school and then an ivy. Why finance? Well I didn't want to be a surgeon or a lawyer, so I guess Wallstreet is the only option left.
Isn't the whole point of banking to get barely enough experience to make you qualified for top HF/PE firms?
As long as you don't have zipper pockets on your suit, I don't give a shit what watch you are wearing.
Before I get all the monkey shit on this website thrown at me, my post was extremely sarcastic.
fartmouth
I go to a target for most banks and I have a killer GPA. I basically deserve an IB career. So what if I wear my diamond studded platinum rolex to an interview?
Do I even bother to keep up with the market? Of course not. I'm in college and I shouldn't be bothered with silly things like reading the Wallstreet Journal. Why does my story suck? Because its boring as shit. I'm from CT, went to a prep school and then an ivy. Why finance? Well I didn't want to be a surgeon or a lawyer, so I guess Wallstreet is the only option left.
Isn't the whole point of banking to get barely enough experience to make you qualified for top HF/PE firms?
As long as you don't have zipper pockets on your suit, I don't give a shit what watch you are wearing.
Before I get all the monkey shit on this website thrown at me, my post was extremely sarcastic.
haha, I know it was - and funny I might add
"Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"
Jimmy, you seem like a
Jimmy, you seem like a reasonable guy.
Can you explain how you are (only) a first year Associate at (I'm assuming) a VC firm after having IB and HF experience? Also, how is it that a first year Associate sits on the board of a portfolio company (are you just an Observer)?
Seems impress for a guy who is 26 years old. Just sayin'.
JD, Good stuff. SB for you.
JD,
Good stuff. SB for you. The rant is a required reading for anyone looking to interview on the Street. I like it.
Noobs like this are
Noobs like this are everywhere. They don't do their homework (on the company and industry) then go in with a preconceived delusional notion of how it all works only to expertly demonstrate their absolute lack of any real world skills and basic easy-to-find knowledge.
So many people eliminate themselves from contention before the interview begins.
I urge anyone serious about getting into banking to read WSO and follow some of the top contributors. You will get offers. This is the easiest way into finance.
Makes a non-target person
Makes a non-target person like me boil. I hate the sense of entitlement some of these people have to these jobs. Yet, there's still barely anyone from my school being hired because we don't have connections or strict finance classes.
OP: Your post is a little
OP: Your post is a little frustrating. I feel like I'd make zero of the mistakes he made, and yet, nobody would probably ever give me an opportunity to work in IB (without significant rebranding). I'm not even saying I want to work in IB, just that nobody would give me a shot.... at least that's how it seems.
For my aspiring Entrepreneurial Nomads, check out my blog.
If you're wondering why
If you're wondering why you're at Harvard and some guy from University of Phoenix took your spot at Goldman IB, memorize Jimmy's post. I'm not in the industry, but I know people, and a lot of you college kids are asshats and ask the wrong questions. Of course, a lot of you aren't, too, and I'm sure in 5, 10, 20 years we'll see y'all doing great things.
"WSO is like the 300 for anti spamage. None shall pass." -happypantsmcgee
"You stop being an asshole when it sucks to be you." -IlliniProgrammer
The fact is, this industry is
The fact is, this industry is incredibly cutthroat, and the margin for error is so small that even one simple mistake can absolutely derail somebody. For a college kid like me with no real world experience, I think it's important to know that even if one has a 4.0 GPA from Wharton, you don't know as much as an analyst who has worked even 6 months on a desk.
I didn't receive any offers after a full year of recruiting, and as upsetting as that was, there were people who worked even harder than I did and also didn't receive anything. It is what it is. They can't take everybody. I have pretty much no sense of entitlement either; I'll pound the drum of making your own luck all day long. Having that sense of humility has helped me through those times: if it's not working, reevaluate, make a few changes, and try to fix it. Law of large numbers; eventually you'll get a hit.
Head of Metal Website: www.headofmetal.com
https://twitter.com/headofmetal2012
Pfalzer wrote: ... even if
... even if one has a 4.0 GPA from Wharton, you don't know as much as an analyst who has worked even 6 months on a desk.
i like how this has worked its way to 6 months from 3 days
... Law of large numbers; eventually you'll get a hit.
unless your distribution is heavily skewed by suit zippers. ps they're probably from india to stop people from stealing your shit. i had to walk around in nairobi city for months with my hands perpetually in my pockets
Yeah, or maybe if you don't
Yeah, or maybe if you don't perfectly fit the mold of prep school -> Ivey league and have connections through daddy then there's no way of getting in.
"Ivy you illiterates.
boutiquebank4life wrote: "Ivy
For my aspiring Entrepreneurial Nomads, check out my blog.
Nice hanging quotation
monkeysama wrote: Nice
Refreshing thread. I would
From a non-target, its always
SirLarryWildman wrote: Guess
George87 wrote: Definitely
I am not cocky, I am confident, and when you tell me I am the best it is a compliment.
-Styles P
Interesting post. Good to
For sure +1 SB
I'm on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen.
This is an excellent
Work hard, play hard.
So should I throw out all my
There is all the difference in the world between treating people equally and attempting to make them equal.
jbert112 wrote: So should I
jimbrowngoU wrote: jbert112
For my aspiring Entrepreneurial Nomads, check out my blog.
IlliniProgrammer wrote: This
.
If your dreams don't scare you, then they are not big enough.
"There are two types of people in this world: People who say they pee in the shower, and dirty fucking liars."-Louis C.K.
George87 wrote: You have to
Oui!oui!oui! Money Gives Power, Power Buys Positions
Once you get past the first
Great post. As a kid going
"Hold on to your butts"
See all my other WSO posts here
As someone at a target, I'm
monkeymark wrote: Once you
Work hard, play hard.
Hey chewingum, Yes and no. As
"Rage, rage against the dying of the light." - DT
chewingum wrote: AI don't get
For my aspiring Entrepreneurial Nomads, check out my blog.
DJ Long Straddle
"Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"
chewingum wrote: I don't get
Work hard, play hard.
IlliniProgrammer wrote: "Fred
For my aspiring Entrepreneurial Nomads, check out my blog.
IlliniProgrammer
"Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"
Jimmy: Isn't it also true
For my aspiring Entrepreneurial Nomads, check out my blog.
beta26 wrote: Also, in
econ wrote: Jimmy: Isn't it
"Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"
chewingum][quote=beta26
Work hard, play hard.
Jimmy: Thanks for the
For my aspiring Entrepreneurial Nomads, check out my blog.
econ wrote: Jimmy: Thanks
"Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"
Thanks a lot, Jimmy.
For my aspiring Entrepreneurial Nomads, check out my blog.
meph wrote: SirLarryWildman