Trophy wife - will this happen to you?

"Cooper said some of the most impoverished-but-wealthy bankers are those with trophy wives. “You’ll get these guys who turn up at work with the girlfriends they’ve had since university, and then suddenly – once they start making a lot of money – they’ll ditch the old university educated girlfriend and find a much more glamorous and good looking woman that they’ve found through work,” she said. Predictably, Cooper said such wives are high maintenance, expecting expensive handbags, expensive shoes, houses in the right areas, expensive education for their children, jewels, nannies and help. “There are lots of lovely men in the City who’ve been with their wives since they were paupers,” said Cooper. “But there are also some who get trapped in relationships where the deal is that they have to earn a lot of money.”"

Source: http://news.efinancialcareers.com/uk-en/140070/when-a-million-isnt-enou…

Will this happen to you?

I have to admit, some women in the industry really know how to slut it up. High heels, thick make up, tight clothes. It is quite hard not to get tempted. :(

 

The idea of being married to someone because she is attractive is the stupidest idea on earth. She will only get uglier. A smart woman will only get smarter.

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford
 

If this is a problem, just set yourself up w/ a girl whos got a fat trust fund. Bam. Problem solved.

“...all truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.” - Schopenhauer
 
DaisukiDaYo:
seabird:

If this is a problem, just set yourself up w/ a girl whos got a fat trust fund. Bam. Problem solved.

This. Does she also have to fat as well or does that not apply here?

Only fat I care about is in the booty area.

“...all truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.” - Schopenhauer
 
VictoriaWoodhull:
I read the whole thing waiting for the joke.

I bet this is something Flake would write.

I would never write such garbage, sir.

Under my tutelage, you will grow from boys to men. From men into gladiators. And from gladiators into SWANSONS.
 

change "trophy wife" to "trophy husband" and "we'll take turns cooking dinner" to "I'll cook and all you have to do is heat up some Bob Evans Mac and Cheese in the microwave" and i'd 100% apply

GBS
 

this isn't so bad. just a creative way of saying: "i'm a wealthy guy looking for an attractive woman who will be a stay-at-home wife and mother."

Money Never Sleeps? More like Money Never SUCKS amirite?!?!?!?
 

Lol... if it were a Trophy Husband, I'd sign up on three conditions. First, screw taking turns cooking dinner, I'd love to cook dinner 4-5 nights a week. Then again, I like to cook and find it a great way to relax. Second, I would want space for two pet projects. The first is a Wood Shop because I would rather build furniture than go to the mall and shop. The second, and more important, is a place where I can brew beer. Buying beer be damned, this is just a personal project and I want to use the office space to start up a business. Third, and most importantly, as long as there's a man cave that I can devote to the pursuit of sports and cinema and use to indoctrinate the kids with a lifelong love of College Football, Hockey and film, I'm down.

 

GWTF, you know I don't think he sounds as lonely and desperate as you make him out to be. I think there is an honest and heartfelt sense of longing on his part and it's somewhat nice to see. Personally, I find the flourishes and the approach to be quite nice and refreshing against a backdrop of pseudo-male machismo we typically see. This guy's a romantic and I'm glad he sticks to his guns. It's unusual and I hope he finds what he's looking for.

 

Heister, seeing as you're worth 50MM+, I think you're in a different boat here since I'm sure you can get a nice trophy wife if you want and be set for life. That said, I don't think it's a man being a pussy if he can't find a way to enjoy life. Personally, if I were married to a woman who made enough to allow me to stay at home, I'd be fine with it. It's not emasculating if you are comfortable with yourself and your own masculinity. That's the key here. You need to be comfortable with yourself and your own masculinity and, to a lesser extent, your own sexuality, in order to be willing to take a role that falls outside the traditional scope of things. If you really have an issue with guys who would be willing to stay at home and raise kids, then your issue is more with the traditional gender roles than anything else. If I were in a trophy husband role, having the time, freedom and bankroll to engage in two passions of mine (building furniture and brewing beer) and potentially build a business on top of it (brewing beer) would be fantastic. Not just that, this would allow me the time to enjoy cooking, and raising my children and teaching them about life. Viewing things from a traditional gender role perspective limits the scope on how people view the world. Open your mind a bit and view things from the other side bro.

 
Frieds:
Heister, seeing as you're worth 50MM+, I think you're in a different boat here since I'm sure you can get a nice trophy wife if you want and be set for life. That said, I don't think it's a man being a pussy if he can't find a way to enjoy life. Personally, if I were married to a woman who made enough to allow me to stay at home, I'd be fine with it. It's not emasculating if you are comfortable with yourself and your own masculinity. That's the key here. You need to be comfortable with yourself and your own masculinity and, to a lesser extent, your own sexuality, in order to be willing to take a role that falls outside the traditional scope of things. If you really have an issue with guys who would be willing to stay at home and raise kids, then your issue is more with the traditional gender roles than anything else. If I were in a trophy husband role, having the time, freedom and bankroll to engage in two passions of mine (building furniture and brewing beer) and potentially build a business on top of it (brewing beer) would be fantastic. Not just that, this would allow me the time to enjoy cooking, and raising my children and teaching them about life. Viewing things from a traditional gender role perspective limits the scope on how people view the world. Open your mind a bit and view things from the other side bro.

This is so fucking gay bro. As men, we hunt, eat and fuck. Let's not get this shit twisted. I respect women and all but I make my own money.

 
GoldmanBallSachs:
I have way more respect for someone who got wealthy by being a "trophy" husband than by simply inheriting it from family. lmao

I have seen a trophy husband. The most emasculating thing ever when you hear the wife scream in front of her children, I'll kick you ass out of the house. Never marry for money.

 

Well, for starters, to each his or her own.

Look, there is nothing wrong with wanting to be a stay-at-home dad. It also comes down to whether you can accept moving past your traditional gender roles into a broad-scoped view of parenting and the family life you want to have. I'll be blunt. I want a family and I want to find a nice work/life balance that allows me to help raise my children. If I am the primary breadwinner, then I work around my schedule in order to make sure I have time for my family. If I marry a woman who can provide for the family in such a way that she's making significantly more than me, it allows me to care for my children and pursue a few passions I have, then I can handle it because I am comfortable enough to handle it. The sad part is that I can't even fathom how many marriages are broken because the husband is a workaholic without any time for his family or the case of children who don't see their father because he's always working. As I said, your ability to view things outside of the box in a nontraditional sense comes down to how comfortable you are with your own masculinity, sexuality and ability to not conform to traditional labels. If you firmly believe in conformist gender roles, then go for it. Me, I'll stick with my point of view whether you like it or not.

 
Frieds:
Well, for starters, to each his or her own.

Look, there is nothing wrong with wanting to be a stay-at-home dad. It also comes down to whether you can accept moving past your traditional gender roles into a broad-scoped view of parenting and the family life you want to have. I'll be blunt. I want a family and I want to find a nice work/life balance that allows me to help raise my children. If I am the primary breadwinner, then I work around my schedule in order to make sure I have time for my family. If I marry a woman who can provide for the family in such a way that she's making significantly more than me, it allows me to care for my children and pursue a few passions I have, then I can handle it because I am comfortable enough to handle it. The sad part is that I can't even fathom how many marriages are broken because the husband is a workaholic without any time for his family or the case of children who don't see their father because he's always working. As I said, your ability to view things outside of the box in a nontraditional sense comes down to how comfortable you are with your own masculinity, sexuality and ability to not conform to traditional labels. If you firmly believe in conformist gender roles, then go for it. Me, I'll stick with my point of view whether you like it or not.

"moving past traditional gender roles" is bullshit man. There is someshit that is built in our system, that we can't get past or overcome. I refuse to believe that it is normal to accept the fact that your wife brings home the bread while you tiddy-feed the kids, that shit is not "moving past traditional gender roles" its more like you're embracing a lifestyle that goes against the makeup of your DNA.

With that said, I wouldn't care if my wife makes equal or more money than me but I cannot sit on my ass and be the "homemaker". The man in me won't let it happen.

But, yes, to each his own.

 

Flake, its because I can make a good argument that causes people to see opposing views that they wouldn't.

Pacman, how is this bullshit? You're just saying it's what we are programmed to do only furthers the stereotype. You say its embracing a lifestyle that goes against your DNA, but you're just giving me rhetoric which follows the traditionalist view of how the breadwinner is supposed to be the man. If you're going to say something is bullshit, at least let it be substantive. Oh, and being a stay at home dad is becoming more common, particularly as a result of the recession. I'm just saying is all...

Whgm, while it has been the traditional view that the male is the primary breadwinner, sometimes you deal the hand your dealt and take it for what its worth. Just put yourself in the position where you lose your job, can't find work and you have a wife who can support you and your family. Would you choose the stay at home dad role despite not being able to work or continue a fruitless search for employment? I'm not advocating being a stay-at-home dad over being a working dad. All I'm saying is that if I were in that position, I would be comfortable as the stay-at-home dad.

 

Why not just work from home? I really don't care if my wife makes more than me but I couldn't live with myself if I wasn't working on some kind of ambition, it's just too ingrained in me and I NEED it. Plus, the second income is always a good backup plan if the primary breadwinner loses their job, I've seen that happen a bunch of times and it's good to have a safety net. Finance would be tough, and lately I've spent a lot of time looking for ways around being chained to an office in NYC: it's cool now, but this shit is going to get fucking OLD at some point. The MDs are rich as hell but I'm just not in love with money enough to sacrifice every other thing. Psychologists, accountants, some doctors and lawyers, business owners, and entrepeneurs can all work from home or have home offices. Working on your own time takes some discipline, but these guys have time for every family thing and friends. Plus, they get more than two weeks a year to have fun on vacation.

The best gig I've come across so far: financial advisor with office at home. I started talking to a guy that clears through another firm (not mine) and he has a pretty sweet life. Dude worked in Asset Management (I think) for years, got fed up, and then just set up shop...he went into it with a well established network and now he's killing it and I mean KILLING IT. He'll be the first to tell you that most PWM don't even know all that much about the markets, they call people like me and we straighten out the pile of capital they bring to the firm. I could do that. People knock PWM here on this site, but it can be really good I do it right.

While we're on the topic: are there any other jobs in finance that you can do remotely or from home? Advisory/coverage/TAS are good for travel, but what about working from home? How is ER?

Get busy living
 

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