In this corner we have 64-year old Investacorp broker Martin Kessman, weighing in at a stout 290 pounds. And in this corner we have the Monarch of Mini-Burgers...the Sultan of Sliders...the one and only White Castle!
This one is too much fun to just let "slide" by (of course the friggin' pun's intended).
Kessman is suing the storied burger chain because their booths aren't built to accommodate their...ahem..."Super Sized" clientele. Evidently he was dining at the White Castle in Nanuet and he had a hard time shoe-horning his fat ass into the stationary booth. He jammed his knee against a metal table leg and ended up limping out of the restaurant.
White Castle tried to make it up to him in response to his complaint by sending him coupons for free sliders on three separate occasions, but the fact that they didn't include the cheese was the straw that broke the elephant's camel's back.
He's suing under the American's With Disabilities Act, but that hasn't stopped him from sending his wife on White Castle runs to the same store. Harold and Kumar would be proud. I'm reminded of The Simpsons episode where Homer tries to get to 300 pounds so he qualifies for partial disability. Come on, Marty, ten more pounds and you can get a dialing wand and wear a muumuu to work.
You guys know I'm just busting this guy's balls, 'cause I'm not exactly Slenderella myself. But it's hard for a chubby New Orleans boy to have too much sympathy for a fellow fatty who chooses White Castle over the truly sublime Krystal Burger. And trust me: in the Big Easy you never have to worry about plus-sized booths. We don't make 'em any other way.
If you're at work wondering what to order for lunch today, let me help you with that:
And for the ULTIMATE Sunday brunch:
If you guys can't tell, I'm pretty much hating the first week of my new diet.
Epic meal time is awesome
I only ever go to white castle because of Harold and Kumar, but that Simpsons episode is classic and epic meal time is awesome. Great post!
Well Eddie, I guess it's a good thing that Paris doesn't have Krystal Burger or White Castle, huh?
i love epic meal time anyone want to start a pool to see who has the first heart attack im betting on muscles glasses
This guy is an idiot for suing like this. Everyone knows this guys name, as he made it on Drudge, and I have not seen anyone defending him.
That being said, I have to agree with the guy (that the seats suck, not the lawsuit) and think those White Castle booths and tables are fucking AWFUL for anyone but a midget. White Castle has to have the absolute worst seating of any chain or restaurant, and I would highly suggest changing these up in the new stores built if I were them.
G.O.A.T
Vel maxime dolorum ipsa minima. Quisquam quidem magni consequatur eligendi.
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