What It Really Means to Be "Alpha"

I'm fairly new here, and deciding what to write about in a blog entry might seem easy enough, but I'd rather people enjoy what I read than just read it and forget it. So I spent some time this week going through the more popular posts on WSO, and a good chunk of them revolve around this hilarious concept of being "alpha," and that "slaying hotties" is a badge of honor and the end-game for us guys in finance.

Even the posts about finding a way to be happy are all just about making money and getting ass. I'll chalk it up mostly to the college freshmen that post on this site, but I feel the need to set the record straight about what it really means to be an "alpha male." And it's a lot more simple than people think.. you don't need millions of dollars, a stable of women, or pumped up biceps. So for your reading pleasure, and inspired by previous bloggers, WhiteHat presents "The Alpha Checklist."

[ X ] - Be Self-Sufficient - This is where the money comes in handy. A man has to be able to take care of himself if he ever expects to take care of anyone else. This isn't all about money though. I'm consistently baffled by the number of Ivy League-educated people I know who can't cook, fix a flat, clean up after themselves, fix basic plumbing, do laundry, or properly clean themselves. There should never be a situation in your every-day life where the thought "I need help" enters your mind. If your apartment explodes because of a gas leak and you're not entirely confident you can put it out yourself... I think that counts as an extraordinary item.

[ X ] - Don't Get Your Ass Kicked - Another one Ivy League-educated friends of mine have a hard time with. I'm not saying you have to be Bruce Lee, but every man should have some reasonable level of experience in learning how to defend themselves. Taking a boxing class or learning self-defense is great not just for the actual use but for confidence purposes. But you don't even have to go that far, just hit the weight room a few times a week or something! You can't expect to give the kind of lip I see from some users on this site in person if you look and sound like Simon Birch. You've got two choices here: either learn to kick some ass or shut the fuck up. I strongly recommend a combination of the two.

[ X ] - Be Interesting - I'd say this is the key to "getting ass" for those solely interested in that kind of thing. Then again, if that's all you're interested in you probably aren't getting any and are a boring son of a bitch to begin with, so for that I pity you. Anyway, the reason people want to be around other people is because it gives them the opportunity to finally lift some attention off their own lives and see what the rest of the monkeys on this planet are up to. Assuming that statement isn't 100% bullshit, this means people gravitate towards those who live very different lives than their own. What I'm trying to say here is... the strategy of "doing what everyone else is doing so they'll like you" is counter-intuitive, and a real man acts the way he wants to act, and luckily that's what makes him fun to be around. This also means all the stuff people throw at you about having "game" and being a "pick-up artist" is absolute dogshit. Follow that line of thinking and you'll be getting as much as the dude on here who claimed to be an Asian dating coach (personal favorite thread during my search... couldn't control myself) as a side project. Screw that shit, be you and I guarantee the kind of girls that enjoy it won't be batshit crazy... well, not to you at least.

[ X ] - Act Like A Boss - This doesn't mean you have to literally be a boss... as in running your own company. What it does mean is that a man never puts himself in a situation where he's forced to bend to the will of another. For those of us in the junior analyst stage of our careers that probably seems pretty hard, but it's more of an attitude than anything else. If you're a banker, the work you do should be for the deal, not for your MD. If you're an investment analyst, your research and your pitch aren't to make your PM happy so he doesn't fire you, they're to test yourself as an investor. This is the attitude you should be coming to work with, and it's the attitude that will prompt you to make sure you have not only have success, but also have one of the things that's most important in finance, especially in a shitty economy like this: an escape plan. If you get the axe tomorrow, the last thing you should be thinking about is how your life is over thanks to your boss. Pull an Ari Gold and get on the phone working on that exit plan... Tsetse fly!

[ X ] - Cut the Politics - While lesser men sit around crying about what policy "should" be in place or what cause needs to be taken up to fix this rotten little world of ours, a real man is out there either fixing it or making the best of a bad situation. There's nothing more annoying to me than a political activist. These armchair warriors are the kinds of people who make me embarrassed that we share the same gender. Things aren't fair, the world isn't perfect, and no matter who's in charge you're going to pay a boatload in taxes, so instead of whining about it you should be out there making sure you find a way to live with it. By the way, despite what they say, chances are your vote doesn't actually count for shit. And like I've said many times before, nothing else in the world matters until you've made sure your own backyard is provided for. And lastly...

[ X ] - Know How To Drink - Yet another massive failure on the part of most of my Ivy League brethren. I get it. You went to an all-boys private Catholic high school and spent more time in a Princeton Review classroom than you did partying, and now it's your turn. Really, I understand. But by the time you get out of college, please have an understanding of how much you can handle. There's nothing more embarrassing for the other men in the room than when you're so belligerent that the bouncer forces us to take you out and the night is ruined because you couldn't hold down 3 Long Islands. And while we're on the subject, have a go-to beer and a go-to cocktail, and make sure neither are blatantly homosexual... unless you're trying to tell us something. Every man should be able to have casual drinks without things turning into a shitshow, and they should have a good idea of what they like and don't like. It's not rocket science.

You're up, monkeys - what else is important to being a true "alpha?" Is being alpha even important? Think this checklist is horribly inaccurate and want to punch me in the face? Have some other suggestions of what makes the man? I wanna hear it.

Mod note (Andy): Throwback Thursday, this originally went up September 2012

 

Writing about being "alpha" is a pretty beta thing to do imo. An alpha wouldn't care to share what makes an alpha, unless he wants people to think he is alpha, in which case he is not an alpha

It's ok though because everyone on this site is a beta

 

great post. let me add a few things:

  • be a leader: i think the most important part of being an "alpha" is having a dominant personality in social situations. in fact, i think this is the defining characteristic of an "alpha".

-do NOT tell other people how "alpha" you are: for those of you going around telling people that you are an "alpha male", you should be aware that you sound like an enourmous tool. you're trying too hard... and nobody likes a try-hard.

Money Never Sleeps? More like Money Never SUCKS amirite?!?!?!?
 

If you are 'WhiteHat', then the Asian Dating Coach was 'AssHat'.

This was a good post, his was the worst ever written on this site. Amazingly, some people actually liked his post...I was not one of them.

 
Carl Richards:
Being an Alpha isn't an acquired trait, its something you've been your entire life. Whether the leader of your group of friends, first one to take charge, captain of the football team..An alpha male is the top of the food chain and as such lesser males follow his lead.

Not quite true. It can be learnt(ed?). Natural Alphas are simply people who acquired it at birth. There's something of a science to it.

But Rhaegar fought valiantly, Rhaegar fought nobly, Rhaegar fought bravely. And Rhaegar died.
 
Anomanderis:
Carl Richards:
Being an Alpha isn't an acquired trait, its something you've been your entire life. Whether the leader of your group of friends, first one to take charge, captain of the football team..An alpha male is the top of the food chain and as such lesser males follow his lead.

Not quite true. It can be learnt(ed?). Natural Alphas are simply people who acquired it at birth. There's something of a science to it.

I think it's a combination of both and subjective based on time and place.

For example: Imagine a room full of a few fixed income investors, all decently successful. In walks Carl Icahn. It doesn't matter if the other gents are all better looking, stronger, more self sufficient, and are iron chefs of pounding vag; in that setting, they will bow down to their master. Carl is the alpha male because he has proven time in and time out that he is the master of his trade.

That same group leaves the office and goes courtside to a Miami Heat game. Icahn's shirt says south beach bitches, but thats neither here nor there. When the warm ups start and the players run out, it becomes immediately clear that Lebron James is not only the alpha male on the court, but in the entire stadium. Icahn is richer, has a way cooler south beach bitches shirt, but Lebron was born from the loins of greatness (that delonte west may or may not have smashed, that too is neither here nor there) and is the only person in the milky way that can do what he does. He trained and learned alpha traits along the way, but he was also born better than everyone else.

My adderall is wearing off so there's a good chance that makes zero sense, but do you get what I'm trying to convey? Alpha depends on your frame of reference; what your goals are, and where are happen to be. It can be natural--a degree of it inevitably is--but it too can be honed and developed. confidence is huge, so is a south beach bitches shirt.

 
Fundamentally Undervalued:
what's with all the colored hats all of the sudden?

"People fear what they don't understand and hate what they can't conquer."

Andrew Smith

 

GreyHat, WhiteHat, BlackHat?

Wtf? Why?

You're born, you take shit. You get out in the world, you take more shit. You climb a little higher, you take less shit. Till one day you're up in the rarefied atmosphere and you've forgotten what shit even looks like. Welcome to the layer cake, son.
 
WhiteHat:
[ X ] - Don't Get Your Ass Kicked - Another one Ivy League-educated friends of mine have a hard time with. I'm not saying you have to be Bruce Lee, but every man should have some reasonable level of experience in learning how to defend themselves. Taking a boxing class or learning self-defense is great not just for the actual use but for confidence purposes. But you don't even have to go that far, just hit the weight room a few times a week or something! You can't expect to give the kind of lip I see from some users on this site in person if you look and sound like Simon Birch. You've got two choices here: either learn to kick some ass or shut the fuck up. I strongly recommend a combination of the two. .

I disagree with this one. I don't think you need to know how to fight to be an alpha male. An alpha male has the presence of being able to defend himself, however he hows how to quickly diffuse dangerous situations without putting himself or others in danger.

I would switch the above with the following:

Take care of your apprerance. Always dress refined. Never give the appereance of being tired or sick. Always be well groomed. Have excellent posture. Have appealing body language. Have great poise.

 
FeelingMean:
Good post.

I am not sure how I would react if someone told me, seriously, that they were an "alpha male"... I didn't know such douchebaggery could exist.

Believe it sir; and that doesn't even win the douchebaggery cup. I once went on a date with a guy who told me he was an alpha male; and added that he was 'the most powerful person that he knew'. there was no second date.

"Dont compromise yourself; you're all you've got" - Janis Joplin
 
MissNG:
FeelingMean:
Good post.

I am not sure how I would react if someone told me, seriously, that they were an "alpha male"... I didn't know such douchebaggery could exist.

Believe it sir; and that doesn't even win the douchebaggery cup. I once went on a date with a guy who told me he was an alpha male; and added that he was 'the most powerful person that he knew'. there was no second date.

8-D +1 this makes me laugh!

Money Never Sleeps? More like Money Never SUCKS amirite?!?!?!?
 

As far as the post goes, being alpha (to me) exudes being a man, doing shit that men are supposed to do and know how to do.

Here is a list of some of the shit that I do that I feel is completely lost on my generation of men:

Shaving - How do you shave? Is it with a gillette mach 3? You are doing it wrong. I shave with a straight razor. Now I understand this may take a little longer what with the stropping and what not (if you don't know what a strop is, that is a huge problem and you are not alpha) but as a man you should still know how to shave with a straight razor. There is nothing manlier or alpha than shaving with an actual hand crafted blade. Even using a double edge safety razor is more alpha than a mach 3 cartridge.

Brewing your own beer. Do any of you know how to do this? Know what is involved in it? Even have room to do in it your over crammed apartment in NY you share with four other guys? Let me tell you something - there is no prouder moment you will have as a man than the time you put into creating your own brew and sharing it with your friends.

Knowledge of fine foods/spirits/wine/cigars - All of this falls into the same category. Do you know the difference between a single malt, vatted malt and blended scotch/whiskey's? Can you pair wines with food? Can you pair beers with food? Can you pair scotch with cigars or wine with cigars? Having this type of knowledge makes you look credible, in charge and intelligent. It makes people respect you and follow your lead.

Can you cook a steak? Do you know how to season a steak? I will give you a hint, if you are cooking it on a grill, you don't know how to cook a steak. If you use steak sauce, you don't know how to season a steak.

These are just a few points of what men should know how to do. The result of knowing things like the above is being alpha.

You're born, you take shit. You get out in the world, you take more shit. You climb a little higher, you take less shit. Till one day you're up in the rarefied atmosphere and you've forgotten what shit even looks like. Welcome to the layer cake, son.
 

I think that stuff is more specific than the things I was thinking about, but good additions nonetheless... especially this one:

Nefarious-:
Can you cook a steak? Do you know how to season a steak? I will give you a hint, if you are cooking it on a grill, you don't know how to cook a steak. If you use steak sauce, you don't know how to season a steak.

Knowing how to cook, especially the basics, is a skill any grown man should probably have...

 
WhiteHat:
I think that stuff is more specific than the things I was thinking about, but good additions nonetheless... especially this one:
Nefarious-:
Can you cook a steak? Do you know how to season a steak? I will give you a hint, if you are cooking it on a grill, you don't know how to cook a steak. If you use steak sauce, you don't know how to season a steak.

Knowing how to cook, especially the basics, is a skill any grown man should probably have...

You would be shocked at the amount of men that do not know how to cook.

You're born, you take shit. You get out in the world, you take more shit. You climb a little higher, you take less shit. Till one day you're up in the rarefied atmosphere and you've forgotten what shit even looks like. Welcome to the layer cake, son.
 
Nefarious-:
Shaving - How do you shave? Is it with a gillette mach 3? You are doing it wrong. I shave with a straight razor. Now I understand this may take a little longer what with the stropping and what not (if you don't know what a strop is, that is a huge problem and you are not alpha) but as a man you should still know how to shave with a straight razor. There is nothing manlier or alpha than shaving with an actual hand crafted blade. Even using a double edge safety razor is more alpha than a mach 3 cartridge.

Knowledge of fine foods/spirits/wine/cigars - All of this falls into the same category. Do you know the difference between a single malt, vatted malt and blended scotch/whiskey's? Can you pair wines with food? Can you pair beers with food? Can you pair scotch with cigars or wine with cigars? Having this type of knowledge makes you look credible, in charge and intelligent. It makes people respect you and follow your lead.

I hope knowing how to quote just part of a comment isn't a defining characteristic of being "alpha," but I disagree with (what I hope I quoted.)

Come on, a single razor makes you alpha..? Lol, that's useless and not alpha. The whole knowledge of food thing is somewhat alpha, but being alpha really comes down to attitude and having an "alpha" personality. An "alpha" really doesn't give a shit about what razor he uses or the differences in whiskeys. He owns what he does, probably looks good/cool doing it, and isn't a puss.

Edit: I do know how to quote part of a comment. I must be alpha.

 
droking7:
Nefarious-:
Shaving - How do you shave? Is it with a gillette mach 3? You are doing it wrong. I shave with a straight razor. Now I understand this may take a little longer what with the stropping and what not (if you don't know what a strop is, that is a huge problem and you are not alpha) but as a man you should still know how to shave with a straight razor. There is nothing manlier or alpha than shaving with an actual hand crafted blade. Even using a double edge safety razor is more alpha than a mach 3 cartridge.

Knowledge of fine foods/spirits/wine/cigars - All of this falls into the same category. Do you know the difference between a single malt, vatted malt and blended scotch/whiskey's? Can you pair wines with food? Can you pair beers with food? Can you pair scotch with cigars or wine with cigars? Having this type of knowledge makes you look credible, in charge and intelligent. It makes people respect you and follow your lead.

I hope knowing how to quote just part of a comment isn't a defining characteristic of being "alpha," but I disagree with (what I hope I quoted.)

Come on, a single razor makes you alpha..? Lol, that's useless and not alpha. The whole knowledge of food thing is somewhat alpha, but being alpha really comes down to attitude and having an "alpha" personality. An "alpha" really doesn't give a shit about what razor he uses or the differences in whiskeys. He owns what he does, probably looks good/cool doing it, and isn't a puss.

Edit: I do know how to quote part of a comment. I must be alpha.

I can't tell if this post is serious - from the troll tone in your reply, your avatar and your username, I just can't tell.

If you don't know the differences in whiskey, shave with a cartridge blade and can't cook a steak, I don't care how much money you have, you are not alpha.

You're born, you take shit. You get out in the world, you take more shit. You climb a little higher, you take less shit. Till one day you're up in the rarefied atmosphere and you've forgotten what shit even looks like. Welcome to the layer cake, son.
 
Nefarious-:
As far as the post goes, being alpha (to me) exudes being a man, doing shit that men are supposed to do and know how to do.

Here is a list of some of the shit that I do that I feel is completely lost on my generation of men:

Shaving - How do you shave? Is it with a gillette mach 3? You are doing it wrong. I shave with a straight razor. Now I understand this may take a little longer what with the stropping and what not (if you don't know what a strop is, that is a huge problem and you are not alpha) but as a man you should still know how to shave with a straight razor. There is nothing manlier or alpha than shaving with an actual hand crafted blade. Even using a double edge safety razor is more alpha than a mach 3 cartridge.

Brewing your own beer. Do any of you know how to do this? Know what is involved in it? Even have room to do in it your over crammed apartment in NY you share with four other guys? Let me tell you something - there is no prouder moment you will have as a man than the time you put into creating your own brew and sharing it with your friends.

Knowledge of fine foods/spirits/wine/cigars - All of this falls into the same category. Do you know the difference between a single malt, vatted malt and blended scotch/whiskey's? Can you pair wines with food? Can you pair beers with food? Can you pair scotch with cigars or wine with cigars? Having this type of knowledge makes you look credible, in charge and intelligent. It makes people respect you and follow your lead.

Can you cook a steak? Do you know how to season a steak? I will give you a hint, if you are cooking it on a grill, you don't know how to cook a steak. If you use steak sauce, you don't know how to season a steak.

These are just a few points of what men should know how to do. The result of knowing things like the above is being alpha.

.... Haha you do some strange things man. I really agreed with you initial statement though, its all about knowing how to do manly shit. With that being said, Grilling is manly as hell. I am always the one running the grill when we have a cookout, and women love that, its a position of respect.

Also, drinking - can you drink whiskey like a man is a big thing. If i hand you a glass of scotch and you look at me and say where is the diet coke, your a puss. If i hand you a shot of wild turkey and you order the next shot and its blue and sugary, your a puss.

I like what the OP said about being able to do everyday stuff - that is a big deal

 

Wow, I'm glad to see general agreement that money =/= alpha. They're by no means mutually exclusive, but I always thought the WSO impression was that one caused the other. My definition has always been based off of how you would handle yourself if SHTF. I know that's vague and be can be described in a million ways. Anything from if a bunch of hoods tried to jump you on a subway, to if you were caught in a natural disaster. Imo, the way you'd handle yourself in those situations says WAYYYYYY more about "alphaness" than your job title or savings account.

GBS
 
GoldmanBallSachs:
Wow, I'm glad to see general agreement that money =/= alpha. They're by no means mutually exclusive, but I always thought the WSO impression was that one caused the other. My definition has always been based off of how you would handle yourself if SHTF. I know that's vague and be can be described in a million ways. Anything from if a bunch of hoods tried to jump you on a subway, to if you were caught in a natural disaster. Imo, the way you'd handle yourself in those situations says WAYYYYYY more about "alphaness" than your job title or savings account.

And again. This is perfect. Some of you monkeys have the right idea after all.

 

I think awareness has a lot to do with this notion of "alpha". If you are aware of yourself, your shortcomings and strengths, you can put yourself in situations that allow you to demonstrate what you excel at. At the same time you need to be aware of what's going on around you. There is a time and place for everything, so knowing when to shine and when to let others shine is very key.

In the end, it shouldn't really matter. If you like who you are/who you're becoming then everyone else can suck a bag of dicks.

 

wow, you guys really give a shit about how someone exudes their presence? You gay fucks.

Who gives a shit. worry about yourself and be a morally right person and mind your own fucking business.

who the fuck goes around and judges someone else to be alpha or not...lol.

I can honestly say I've never ever gone around campus and looked at someone and said to myself, "damn, that's one alpha dude...jesus h. christ, I wish I can be like him." honestly, never.

you guys just lost respect from me.

I've hung out with cool dudes and I've hung out with some retarded fucks, that's as far as judging someone goes. I don't even give a shit if they're a bit anti-social or weird, I understand where they're coming from and I make it work, but I've never described someone as alpha. I go to a southern university and, instinctively, you'd think there'd be alphas everywhere, but I've never had to describe someone using that word. personable or weird as fuck or talkative, i would use, but not alpha/beta.

people on 4chan do these discussions and it's killing me you guys view guys as alpha/beta based on their actions. we're all different, who gives a shit.

Man cannot remake himself without suffering, for he is both the marble and the sculptor. -Dr. Alexis Carrel
 
xxix:
wow, you guys really give a shit about how someone exudes their presence? You gay fucks.

Who gives a shit. worry about yourself and be a morally right person and mind your own fucking business.

who the fuck goes around and judges someone else to be alpha or not...lol.

I can honestly say I've never ever gone around campus and looked at someone and said to myself, "damn, that's one alpha dude...jesus h. christ, I wish I can be like him." honestly, never.

you guys just lost respect from me.

I've hung out with cool dudes and I've hung out with some retarded fucks, that's as far as judging someone goes. I don't even give a shit if they're a bit anti-social or weird, I understand where they're coming from and I make it work, but I've never described someone as alpha. I go to a southern university and, instinctively, you'd think there'd be alphas everywhere, but I've never had to describe someone using that word. personable or weird as fuck or talkative, i would use, but not alpha/beta.

people on 4chan do these discussions and it's killing me you guys view guys as alpha/beta based on their actions. we're all different, who gives a shit.

ironically the most "alpha" thing i've read in this thread thusfar.

Money Never Sleeps? More like Money Never SUCKS amirite?!?!?!?
 
sayandarula:
xxix:
wow, you guys really give a shit about how someone exudes their presence? You gay fucks.

Who gives a shit. worry about yourself and be a morally right person and mind your own fucking business.

who the fuck goes around and judges someone else to be alpha or not...lol.

I can honestly say I've never ever gone around campus and looked at someone and said to myself, "damn, that's one alpha dude...jesus h. christ, I wish I can be like him." honestly, never.

you guys just lost respect from me.

I've hung out with cool dudes and I've hung out with some retarded fucks, that's as far as judging someone goes. I don't even give a shit if they're a bit anti-social or weird, I understand where they're coming from and I make it work, but I've never described someone as alpha. I go to a southern university and, instinctively, you'd think there'd be alphas everywhere, but I've never had to describe someone using that word. personable or weird as fuck or talkative, i would use, but not alpha/beta.

people on 4chan do these discussions and it's killing me you guys view guys as alpha/beta based on their actions. we're all different, who gives a shit.

ironically the most "alpha" thing i've read in this thread thusfar.

It's sigma (independent). Alpha is social. Lol at using these notions which are fairly dorky though

Good thread overall, but being a leader / dominant person / alpha male is inside. It's how you get what you want from life and bend the reality to your will

 
xxix:
I can honestly say I've never ever gone around campus

Students aren't alpha.

You're born, you take shit. You get out in the world, you take more shit. You climb a little higher, you take less shit. Till one day you're up in the rarefied atmosphere and you've forgotten what shit even looks like. Welcome to the layer cake, son.
 
Best Response
Nefarious-:
xxix:
I can honestly say I've never ever gone around campus

Students aren't alpha.

And what makes you think it's any different with anyone else?

you know who i think is alpha? fathers who take up 2 jobs, waiting tables during the day and then UPS for nightshift so he could put his son through school. work so goddamn hard he doesn't even have time to play ball with his kids. worked at it for a few years enough for him to save up enough money to open up businesses to provide for his kids. put aside his goals and ambitions to raise his kids.

people like that, I look up to.

you're fucking sitting here telling me you go about fucking talking about cigars and wines to other bros and calling them alpha? Get the fuck out of here with your gay and obsessed shit.

Don't get me wrong, people with money and power, I respect. I respect how they got there, the shit they put in to get where they are, but I don't make em out to be alpha/beta. how many dudes out there make a fuck ton of money and get to high places and are still weird as shit? pay for their fucking girls that are 1/3 their age; become sugardaddies. you look up to people like that?

In my life, the only people who i give a shit enough to judge is my potential wife. you want to make sure the girl you're committing to will be the one you want to mother your children; likewise, you have to try to be the man that is the same caliber of the girl you're looking for. i.e. be morally righteous, do good shit for the sake of doing it, be tidy and clean up after yourself, be able to take care of yourself, and work fucking hard to get to where you want to be. (also take care of your looks, chicks don't want ugly bros)

fucking sitting here talking about how some dude is so goddamn alpha because he can react in dangerous situations or because he has a shit ton of money/power, or bc he can compare wines/cigars.

you guys really are jaded fucks.

Man cannot remake himself without suffering, for he is both the marble and the sculptor. -Dr. Alexis Carrel
 

Alright, A) I'm neither educated nor from an Ivy league.
B) I have no reason to believe you are currently not on a horse unless photo evidence is provided C) I am not Batman, and finally D) I was NOT just set straight by a 19 y.o..... like at all. I'm a little unclear on why you even feel that way, lol

GBS
 

I think alpha is a matter of responsibility. Reading some of the better posts in this thread, the fundamental message I see as his is that a man is one who assumes responsibility for all aspects of his life (and for those of anyone dependent on him). I agree wholeheartedly.

I am distinctly unimpressed by the wealthy, young, successful, fit guy who came from an old-money family, enjoyed the best education all his life, coasted into a top school, barely lifted his finger during those four years for anything other than some new strange every weekend night, walked into his dream job thanks to family connections, and has lived, breathed, and rubbed shoulders in the upper echelon of society his entire life. The man who overcame adversity whenever he faced it, be it in the home, the classroom, his career, or in war has far more proved by virtue of his tenacity, perseverance, and resilience of spirit his manhood than anyone else.

Alpha describes a state of mind to me, a mindframe. There is an inherent conundrum. Some of you might describe certain abilities or traits as "alpha," like knowing your liquor or cooking your own meat, dressing yourself impeccably or being incredibly fit, sexing beautiful goddesses regularly or regaling anyone around you on the finer points of horology. To me, those simple actions do not qualify as alpha. An alpha male is someone who has that inner piece, that indescribable "it" that just makes him want to succeed at everything he does. Because of that, he takes the greatest delight in everything that matters to him, becoming the best at everything that's important in his life. Therefore, the actions do not qualify him as alpha, the actions result from his alpha personality and are natural fruit of that fact, not root of it.

I am permanently behind on PMs, it's not personal.
 
APAE:
I think alpha is a matter of responsibility. Reading some of the better posts in this thread, the fundamental message I see as his is that a man is one who assumes responsibility for all aspects of his life (and for those of anyone dependent on him). I agree wholeheartedly.

I am distinctly unimpressed by the wealthy, young, successful, fit guy who came from an old-money family, enjoyed the best education all his life, coasted into a top school, barely lifted his finger during those four years for anything other than some new strange every weekend night, walked into his dream job thanks to family connections, and has lived, breathed, and rubbed shoulders in the upper echelon of society his entire life. The man who overcame adversity whenever he faced it, be it in the home, the classroom, his career, or in war has far more proved by virtue of his tenacity, perseverance, and resilience of spirit his manhood than anyone else.

This is very true. "Alpha" is a stupid term propagated by pick-up artists to describe people who go into clubs and have 5 people around them the entire time laughing and frolicking for trivial and superficial reasons. But to be someone who is honorable, righteous, hard-working, and takes responsibility for his OR HER actions -- that is admirable. You can call that "alpha" or whatever else helps you sleep at night, but that's what really matters in this world...accomplish that first, and then you have plenty of time left to enjoy cigars BECAUSE YOU ENJOY THEM and not because it's considered "alpha" to do so.
 
WhiteHat:

[ X ] - Act Like A Boss - This doesn't mean you have to literally be a boss... as in running your own company. What it does mean is that a man never puts himself in a situation where he's forced to bend to the will of another. For those of us in the junior analyst stage of our careers that probably seems pretty hard, but it's more of an attitude than anything else. If you're a banker, the work you do should be for the deal, not for your MD. If you're an investment analyst, your research and your pitch aren't to make your PM happy so he doesn't fire you, they're to test yourself as an investor. This is the attitude you should be coming to work with, and it's the attitude that will prompt you to make sure you have not only have success, but also have one of the things that's most important in finance, especially in a shitty economy like this: an escape plan. If you get the axe tomorrow, the last thing you should be thinking about is how your life is over thanks to your boss. Pull an Ari Gold and get on the phone working on that exit plan... Tsetse fly!

"Act Like a Boss" ...aka "How to make the people you work for hate you"

"Cut the Politics" ...yes there are more manly ways to spend time than moaning about politics, but if we don't aren't careful we could be like the French wondering how we got here

Bottom line -- Being an Analyst=Not Alpha

 

I think the arguments about specific activities being manly is a little empty. Like APAE said, being "alpha" (stupid word, but I used it since that's what people on here call it with regularity) is a mindset and not some specific skill set that if you don't have makes you a lesser man. Whatever you do in life, if you own it then you will have the respect of the people around you, regardless of what it is. If all you eat is totally burnt skirt steak covered in salsa and deep fried in butter, if you own it and you recognize that's just who you are, I'm not gonna have a problem with you. There's an enormous difference between having someone's respect and being liked or admired or cared about. A real man is able to command respect, regardless of what he does, and that has absolutely nothing to do with the things he does but rather the way he does them.

Also, I'm pretty sure none of those things I listed are "bro" in any way, shape, or form. Your typical frat boy is 1) completely dependent on mom, dad, and his bros, 2) weak, mouthy, and a pussy in general, 3) one boring motherfucker, 4) a sheep who answers to the larger group, 5) plays favorites and tries to impress the people around him, and 6) vomits after 3 appletinis and a 10 second keg stand. If what I described is the typical "bro" wherever you go to school, I probably would have joined a frat.

 
Torres:
Hahahaha... Nefarious is such a douche - and getting all mad about it

It's getting hard to reply with the hole I just punched in my screen. God, I am so mad right now.

You're born, you take shit. You get out in the world, you take more shit. You climb a little higher, you take less shit. Till one day you're up in the rarefied atmosphere and you've forgotten what shit even looks like. Welcome to the layer cake, son.
 
Nefarious-:
Torres:
Hahahaha... Nefarious is such a douche - and getting all mad about it

It's getting hard to reply with the hole I just punched in my screen. God, I am so mad right now.

bro, relax. you getting so worked up is only baiting the troll in me to keep at this. I just wanted to let you know, shaving with a straight razor isn't prestigious shit. people don't do it anymore, not because they're not manly, but because they don't give a shit enough to go through the trouble. real. you like cooking? become a chef. getting your panties in a bunch and misconstruing my words to make yourself look like a badass doesn't make you a badass, broham.
Nefarious-:
A jumbled reply of misspellings and terrible grammar attacking industry (a portion of finance that a lot of people go into after their IBD stint) and then using your age as a crutch to "bow out gracefully."

Amazing how you reference my ad hominems (go ahead and google it jr.) after your loaded posts of calling everyone jaded fucks and other nonsense.

Like I said, cancel the internet, drop out of college, etc. etc.

I wasn't attacking ANYTHING. If i recall correctly, you were the guy who suggested that we all go back to cooking steaks and shaving with straight razors. if that's your idea of being alpha...i'll leave it at that. I just want you to know you're a little simple-minded, that's all. You get so pissed off to the point where you have to restate my age and place in life [in college, lol] and how you descredit and not eating my shit up because i'm not an MD at an AM firm or because i'm not ben bernanke or his cohorts.

position in life means a lot, and i'm sure if i were not 19 and a college student, i'd get more respect for the things I say and do. I understand I don't know many things about life, but i do know one thing. No one fucking uses the alpha/beta context outside of the internet [unless they're in higher math or something...i'm saying in the same sense you guys use it], and you're out of your mind to think that if cooking your meat a certain way and shaving with a straight razor makes you alpha.

p.s. nefarious.... now imagine if i WAS ben bernanke or an MD...

Man cannot remake himself without suffering, for he is both the marble and the sculptor. -Dr. Alexis Carrel
 

It's funny to hear you guys theorizing over what it means to be alpha.

We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

And the idea of a non-alpha thinking about what it means to be alpha and trying to get there is just silly. Alpha-ness is not behavior. It's not skill. It's not even cognition. You might be able to copy every behavioral trait of a truly alpha male, but that wouldn't make you an alpha. Alpha-ness is in the core of who you are.

So stop thinking about it. And for Chrissake, stop caring about it. Alpha-dom brings its own problems, and you can get tons of women and tons of money and have an awesome life as a beta or even an omega.

 
bankerella:
It's funny to hear you guys theorizing over what it means to be alpha.

We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

And the idea of a non-alpha thinking about what it means to be alpha and trying to get there is just silly. Alpha-ness is not behavior. It's not skill. It's not even cognition. You might be able to copy every behavioral trait of a truly alpha male, but that wouldn't make you an alpha. Alpha-ness is in the core of who you are.

So stop thinking about it. And for Chrissake, stop caring about it. Alpha-dom brings its own problems, and you can get tons of women and tons of money and have an awesome life as a beta or even an omega.

hey. I am the alpha and omega. what's up?

 
bankerella:
It's funny to hear you guys theorizing over what it means to be alpha.

We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

And the idea of a non-alpha thinking about what it means to be alpha and trying to get there is just silly. Alpha-ness is not behavior. It's not skill. It's not even cognition. You might be able to copy every behavioral trait of a truly alpha male, but that wouldn't make you an alpha. Alpha-ness is in the core of who you are.

So stop thinking about it. And for Chrissake, stop caring about it. Alpha-dom brings its own problems, and you can get tons of women and tons of money and have an awesome life as a beta or even an omega.

That makes sense. What's an omega?

Not to beat a dead horse, but if anyone wants to truly see what a 'beta' is, I present to you the best example I've found: //www.wallstreetoasis.com/blog/day-9-why-i-wont-date-bankerella

That is weak.

 
SirTradesaLot:
bankerella:
It's funny to hear you guys theorizing over what it means to be alpha.

We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

And the idea of a non-alpha thinking about what it means to be alpha and trying to get there is just silly. Alpha-ness is not behavior. It's not skill. It's not even cognition. You might be able to copy every behavioral trait of a truly alpha male, but that wouldn't make you an alpha. Alpha-ness is in the core of who you are.

So stop thinking about it. And for Chrissake, stop caring about it. Alpha-dom brings its own problems, and you can get tons of women and tons of money and have an awesome life as a beta or even an omega.

That makes sense. What's an omega?

Not to beat a dead horse, but if anyone wants to truly see what a 'beta' is, I present to you the best example I've found: //www.wallstreetoasis.com/blog/day-9-why-i-wont-date-bankerella

That is weak.

I agree -- Human was vulnerable. But let's not make non-alpha status pejorative. Pretty please? It's misandronist (or whatever the opposite of misogynist is).

Truth is, the majority of males aren't alphas. Most of the guys in this thread aren't alphas (I name no names). Alpha-hood is one type of manhood, but it isn't the only type or even the pinnacle of manhood. There is a spectrum of types, each of which is lovely and admirable when properly rocked by a real man who knows how.

For an alpha to adore alpha-hood is fatuous; for a beta to adore alpha-hood is self-denigrating and annoying as fuck. More importantly, there are a ton of roles on Wall Street that I would never hire an alpha for, including anything where overconfidence can hurt the firm.

If you're not an alpha, respect that and rock it. You can have your cigars and your scotch. You can have tons of pussy. You can build and run companies. You can have a massive dick and a ball sack that makes you walk bow-legged. You can also have first dibs on some of the choicest women, as some aspects of modern culture cause certain types of females to avoid alphas rather than prefer them.

But whatever you do, never try to be an alpha if you're worried that you're not. In so doing, you devalue manhood in all its variety, you denigrate yourself, you fool nobody, and you waste time and energy you could have spent doing something awesome, like two chicks at the same time, or getting a sorority girl to stir your old-fashioned with her nipple.

 
SirTradesaLot:
bankerella:
It's funny to hear you guys theorizing over what it means to be alpha.

We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

And the idea of a non-alpha thinking about what it means to be alpha and trying to get there is just silly. Alpha-ness is not behavior. It's not skill. It's not even cognition. You might be able to copy every behavioral trait of a truly alpha male, but that wouldn't make you an alpha. Alpha-ness is in the core of who you are.

So stop thinking about it. And for Chrissake, stop caring about it. Alpha-dom brings its own problems, and you can get tons of women and tons of money and have an awesome life as a beta or even an omega.

That makes sense. What's an omega?

Not to beat a dead horse, but if anyone wants to truly see what a 'beta' is, I present to you the best example I've found: //www.wallstreetoasis.com/blog/day-9-why-i-wont-date-bankerella

That is weak.

my special friend Jesus is both alpha and omega. he's just magical i guess, gets all the hoes.
 
bankerella:
It's funny to hear you guys theorizing over what it means to be alpha.

We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

And the idea of a non-alpha thinking about what it means to be alpha and trying to get there is just silly. Alpha-ness is not behavior. It's not skill. It's not even cognition. You might be able to copy every behavioral trait of a truly alpha male, but that wouldn't make you an alpha. Alpha-ness is in the core of who you are.

So stop thinking about it. And for Chrissake, stop caring about it. Alpha-dom brings its own problems, and you can get tons of women and tons of money and have an awesome life as a beta or even an omega.

As far as I'm concerned with my manliness and taking pride in the manly things in life, it's definitely a man to man issue, never a man to woman issue. Any man can get any woman, and being more "alpha" or manly is hardly a factor in 99% of cases. To me anyway, it's more about respect from other men than about getting girls. That hardly plays into the equation of what makes a man. If it did, those Navy SEALs would be fucked.

 
bankerella:
We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

I have some novel evidence that you might not have considered. Women's intuition is often wrong and women often make poor decisions - especially about men.

Although if the definition of an alpha is someone whom women agree is alpha, then this is essentially a useless discussion.

 
<span class=keyword_link><a href=//www.wallstreetoasis.com/company/goldman-sachs>GS</a></span>:
bankerella:
We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

I have some novel evidence that you might not have considered. Women's intuition is often wrong and women often make poor decisions - especially about men.

Although if the definition of an alpha is someone whom women agree is alpha, then this is essentially a useless discussion.

Hold up, I'm not saying women necessarily like alphas. Or that they should like alphas. Or that alphas are better or worse in general for women. Just that some of us have alpha-radar.

 
bankerella:
It's funny to hear you guys theorizing over what it means to be alpha.

We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

And the idea of a non-alpha thinking about what it means to be alpha and trying to get there is just silly. Alpha-ness is not behavior. It's not skill. It's not even cognition. You might be able to copy every behavioral trait of a truly alpha male, but that wouldn't make you an alpha. Alpha-ness is in the core of who you are.

So stop thinking about it. And for Chrissake, stop caring about it. Alpha-dom brings its own problems, and you can get tons of women and tons of money and have an awesome life as a beta or even an omega.

Alpha-ness is not the core of anything. It just seems that way to the opposite sex, or to others in different parts of the social structure.

The position of the Alpha male within primates is not an "innate" quality/trait to that specific monkey, rather it is very much socially constructed and subject to change in terms of who fills that role. The actual man you might see as Alpha today, would most certainly have been a beta to someone else in a different context.

You guys should read Chimpanzee Politics: Power & sex among apes... it's a classic. haha!

It is a social position, or a set of characteristics/behaviours associated with that social position. The modern life hack is that a man can easily obtain these characteristics through emulation/personal effort and women and other men do respond to him as if he held the actual social position. They can't help it. A bonus is that a monkey (in the city or in the wild) can have more sexual privilege because of this knowledge. Women appreciate it too. They generally prefer a man over a boy... although as other posters have mentioned. It is really about more than just sexual privilege. It's political.

 
bankerella:
We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

Bankerella is right. Women do know who the alphas are, but it's not because of some mysterious intuition or forehead tattoo. It's because alphas have a distinct calling card that all women recognize and love. I was oblivious to this calling card until one day some alphas of lore sat me down and let me in on the secret. Turns out the secret involves a little trick alphas call the "sneak preview." Here's how it works:

You invite a woman out on a date to a nice restaurant or bar. Before you head out on said date, make sure you are wearing slacks but are not wearing any underwear. Then, at some point during the meal / drink when the time is right (you'll know when), secretly unzip your pants a little. Resist the temptation to pull your junk all the way out. You're just going for a little glimpse of some side-johnson here - not some tasteless display of your full package (remember, alphas like to keep things classy, Don Draper style). Stand up, turn to the side, and say, "I need to hit the head real quick" (referring to the bathroom as "the head" sounds militaryesque which is obviously alpha). Once she sees your "sneak preview," she'll instantly realize she is dealing with an alpha and will give you a libidinous smile, indicating she is excited about what's to come later in the evening. Game, set, match.

Just one warning. Be wary about pulling the sneak preview in steakhouses. We all know that being able to cook a steak properly, pairing wine, and picking out the right beret for any occasion are hallmark traits of the alpha male, which means the head chef at a steakhouse is pretty much alpha male #1. Trying to sneak preview your woman with this guy around is like trying to waltz into the Zambezi river and pick off a sow (or whatever female hippos are called) from the resident bull hippo. I don't care how tight your beret picking game is or how much like gasoline your scotch tastes, you're going to come out on the wrong side of that equation, every time. Use your sneak preview with discretion fellas.

 
labanker:
bankerella:
We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

Point is, it's extraordinarily clear to me whether or not a male is an alpha, to the point where you guys might as well be walking around with ranks on your foreheads.

Bankerella is right. Women do know who the alphas are, but it's not because of some mysterious intuition or forehead tattoo. It's because alphas have a distinct calling card that all women recognize and love. I was oblivious to this calling card until one day some alphas of lore sat me down and let me in on the secret. Turns out the secret involves a little trick alphas call the "sneak preview." Here's how it works:

You invite a woman out on a date to a nice restaurant or bar. Before you head out on said date, make sure you are wearing slacks but are not wearing any underwear. Then, at some point during the meal / drink when the time is right (you'll know when), secretly unzip your pants a little. Resist the temptation to pull your junk all the way out. You're just going for a little glimpse of some side-johnson here - not some tasteless display of your full package (remember, alphas like to keep things classy, Don Draper style). Stand up, turn to the side, and say, "I need to hit the head real quick" (referring to the bathroom as "the head" sounds militaryesque which is obviously alpha). Once she sees your "sneak preview," she'll instantly realize she is dealing with an alpha and will give you a libidinous smile, indicating she is excited about what's to come later in the evening. Game, set, match.

Just one warning. Be wary about pulling the sneak preview in steakhouses. We all know that being able to cook a steak properly, pairing wine, and picking out the right beret for any occasion are hallmark traits of the alpha male, which means the head chef at a steakhouse is pretty much alpha male #1. Trying to sneak preview your woman with this guy around is like trying to waltz into the Zambezi river and pick off a sow (or whatever female hippos are called) from the resident bull hippo. I don't care how tight your beret picking game is or how much like gasoline your scotch tastes, you're going to come out on the wrong side of that equation, every time. Use your sneak preview with discretion fellas.

Fucking gold.

"For I am a sinner in the hands of an angry God. Bloody Mary full of vodka, blessed are you among cocktails. Pray for me now and at the hour of my death, which I hope is soon. Amen."
 
bankerella:
We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

I am not Jackie or Marilyn, so I will definitely support him even he's not JFK. In fact, as a femlae, I couldn't care less about the whole 'alpha' argument. What I do care is whether my SH can give me a sense of security.

The Auto Show
 
huanleshalemei:
bankerella:
We women (well, at least some women) have this thing where we just know. I can't even describe how we know, or what the signs are. (I suppose it's instinctive and biological, related to the ability to select the man most able to keep a family alive. Whatever.)

I am not Jackie or Marilyn, so I will definitely support him even he's not JFK. In fact, as a femlae, I couldn't care less about the whole 'alpha' argument. What I do care is whether my SH can give me a sense of security.

Brady, is that you? Are you crossdressing?

 

There seems to be a big difference between actually being Alpha and just thinking you are. Ivan from Eastbound and Down sums it up pretty well here.

http://www.youtube.com/embed/xERaKmkycd4

My name is Nicky, but you can call me Dre.
 

ITT: Maladjusted geeks thinking they can nerd their way to alphadom

Keep working on those self-help videos, dorks, and realize that Woody Allen is getting laid more in his 70s than you will in your entire life

 

this thread is hilarious. when did chores and hygiene activities become alpha? can i add some other alpha behaviors?

  1. knowing what kind of wine cooler to pair with the entrees at Applebee's
  2. using a bidet; scraping fecal residue off your sphincter is quintessential beta
  3. not crying during "The Notebook" -- after all those years they stayed in love!
 

Isn't this really something where if you have to wonder about being an "alpha" you probably aren't? But here's something to add, which really just sums it all up: Always be in command of your environment.

You can shave with a chiseled elephant tusk and douse your meat in only the finest of gourmet rubs, but if you aren't in command of your environment then you've probably already been sniffed out as a poser.

 

Awesome man.

If you ain't gettin money dat mean you done somethin wrong. " If you have built castles in the air , your work need not be lost; that is where they should be . Now put the foundations under them." - Henry David Thoreau
 

Wow alpha what a .... wow..

If you ain't gettin money dat mean you done somethin wrong. " If you have built castles in the air , your work need not be lost; that is where they should be . Now put the foundations under them." - Henry David Thoreau
 
<span class=keyword_link><a href=//www.wallstreetoasis.com/company/goldman-sachs>GS</a></span>:
BlackHat:
I'm alpha because I outperform the market

I'm gamma because I'm energetic and dangerous.

Okay, that's it. In honor of you ridiculous mofo's, the next set of interviews I do, I'm going to ask, "If you were a finance term represented by a Greek letter, which would you be and why?"

Not that this is an appropriate or relevant question for banking. But I don't really care.

 
CaR:
In The Flesh:
Be able to intelligently, passionately and logically explain the artistic merit of your favorite musician and why they are the greatest.

What if your favorite "musician" is skrillex?

Haven't seen it done yet...

Metal. Music. Life. www.headofmetal.com
 
In The Flesh:
Be able to intelligently, passionately and logically explain the artistic merit of your favorite musician and why they are the greatest.

isn't that what their music is for?

 
Febreeze:
In The Flesh:
Be able to intelligently, passionately and logically explain the artistic merit of your favorite musician and why they are the greatest.

isn't that what their music is for?

Yes, and it's also what their passionate, knowledgable fans are for if your music player is unavailable at the moment.

Metal. Music. Life. www.headofmetal.com
 

Just be a man.

The definition is going to change depending on circumstances: in some cases, toting a gun on the battlefield makes you a man. In other cases, supporting family while working a job you hate while looking for other opportunites makes you a man. Another circumstance may call for artistic ability / sensitivity / self expression. Yet other circumstances may call for stoicism. I don't see much use for arbitrary lists of qualifiers and measuring up to them. Who even says alpha is desireable? Dudes I know who are career Marines always tell me that the dumbest guy wanted to be point...or the guy no one liked...and that dude dies first. Is that alpha? I understand the basic behavioral templates are often a starting point for many people, but think there's a whole lot more to life than adhering to them...

It's this simple: be a big kid.

Get busy living
 
The definition is going to change depending on circumstances: in some cases, toting a gun on the battlefield makes you a man. In other cases, supporting family while working a job you hate while looking for other opportunites makes you a man. Another circumstance may call for artistic ability / sensitivity / self expression. Yet other circumstances may call for stoicism. I don't see much use for arbitrary lists of qualifiers and measuring up to them. Who even says alpha is desireable? Dudes I know who are career Marines always tell me that the dumbest guy wanted to be point...or the guy no one liked...and that dude dies first. Is that alpha? I understand the basic behavioral templates are often a starting point for many people, but think there's a whole lot more to life than adhering to them...
Good to have an adult comment on this.

I think a good definition of an alpha male is someone who can go from high places to low places without developing an inferiority complex. The barista at starbucks who used to be a hotshot trader but can still serve up a coffee with a smile? That takes a lot of mental toughness.

That is the kind of person we should all aspire to be. Someone who has transcended status and comparisons.

 
IlliniProgrammer:
I think a good definition of an alpha male is someone who can go from high places to low places without developing an inferiority complex.
....or conversely, someone who goes from a humble station in life to a position of power. Maintaining good character, or at least making an honest effort to, is a pretty huge indicator of who a person really is. That's just me.

I came into this industry with a raging sense of inferiority compared to many people here, and while my ego does act up on some days (not too proud of that), I have made it a point to retain my value system. I'm by no means at all a huge success (yet) but I would like to think that my identity and personal morals aren't going to be corrupted by my source of income ......or the size of it.

....not to say I'm not an idiot, even on a good day xD http://www.roflx.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/fo.jpg

Get busy living
 
UFOinsider][quote=IlliniProgrammer:
I think a good definition of an alpha male is someone who can go from high places to low places without developing an inferiority complex.
....or conversely, someone who goes from a humble station in life to a position of power. Maintaining good character, or at least making an honest effort to, is a pretty huge indicator of who a person really is. That's just me.

I came into this industry with a raging sense of inferiority compared to many people here, and while my ego does act up on some days (not too proud of that), I have made it a point to retain my value system. I'm by no means at all a huge success (yet) but I would like to think that my identity and personal morals aren't going to be corrupted by my source of income ......or the size of it.

....not to say I'm not an idiot, even on a good day xD http://www.roflx.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/fo.jpg[/quote]

What is this moody reflective bullshit? What the f's wrong with you today, UFO, your time of the month? You have tremendous douchebag potential, and it's just sad to see you throwing it away like this. I know the road to garnering respect by being the better person starts out looking pretty good, but in the end all it gets you is second place.

Auntie's prescription: take a step back, take a deep breath, and list at least ten reasons why you're innately superior. Then come back to us when you feel ready.

 

Be self-sufficient? That's the dumbest shit ever. You think Caesar knew how to do laundry? You think Genghis Khan gave a shit about cooking?

Alpha Qualities: 1) Leader of men. 2) Women want to sleep with you.

That's it. There is nothing else to it. How you get to that point depends on your environment (50 BC Rome, 2012 America, etc).

 

Life is like swimming. It's not a race against the competition; it is a race against the clock. Of course, in life, the clock is even more important than it is in swimming.

PetEng:
Be self-sufficient? That's the dumbest shit ever. You think Caesar knew how to do laundry? You think Genghis Khan gave a shit about cooking?

Alpha Qualities: 1) Leader of men. 2) Women want to sleep with you.

That's it. There is nothing else to it. How you get to that point depends on your environment (50 BC Rome, 2012 America, etc).

Nobody alive today will be Genghis Khan or Julius Caesar, let alone John D Rockefeller, so your point is irrelevant.

Welcome to 2012 America. Stop whining and learn to cook.

Auntie's prescription: take a step back, take a deep breath, and list at least ten reasons why you're innately superior. Then come back to us when you feel ready.
What if most of them revolve around the fact that I'm superior because I don't need to hide some terrible inferiority complex by speculating about what constitutes "alpha"?

Wait, that would make me a hipster.

That does it, no more PBR and posting on WSO late on a Friday night for me. I am switching to Milwaukee's Best.

 
IlliniProgrammer:
I'm superior because I don't need to hide some terrible inferiority complex by speculating about what constitutes "alpha"
IlliniProgrammer:
I think a good definition of an alpha male is someone who can go from high places to low places without developing an inferiority complex. The barista at Starbucks who used to be a hotshot trader but can still serve up a coffee with a smile

Interesting.

 

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