I'm posting this on a throw-away account. I'll try to keep this short and just give a summary.
So I used to be a pretty sociable kid, especially towards the end of high school, when I was going out a lot and I was on the soccer team, had a lot of friends. I went to college on the East Coast at an Ivy, made a ton of friends, and had the time of my life for the first year. I was going out a lot, always had people over at my dorm. I was doing well in my classes. Life had never been better.
The second year, everyone rushes fraternities, because we aren't allowed freshman year, and my friend group completely splits up into smaller groups. I rushed two fraternities, went pretty far in the process, but didn't end up getting a bid. Fraternities at my school are a huge time commitment. My old friends would still be down to hang out, but they were really always busy with fraternity events that eventually we just kind of faded apart.
So basically, I spent a lot of time over my sophomore year alone, and I just focused on on school and getting an internship for the summer. Didn't really have any fun, felt like my life was just wasting away all the time. Had some pretty bad depression for awhile, was hard to get out of bed, but I was still productive and did well in my classes.
So I have my career stuff figured out, as I locked down an internship for the summer. But socially, I'm worried that my junior year is going to be the same ordeal. I'm studying abroad in the spring just to get off campus, so at least I have that to look forward to. But I just sort of hate feeling like I'm alone all the time, especially because I'm an extroverted person, but I don't really know how to fix my situation. I would rush a fraternity again, but it'd be a pretty bad look to not get a bid a second time.
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