First of all, I consider myself to be a very manly guy with the same type of personality, traits, and hobbies that most warm blooded males have. However, there is one particular activity that I neither enjoy nor see the point of it; and that is strip clubs. Most of you will say well the point is to see naked women. Well that's cool, and all, but I also like to touch which as we know is not allowed. Now, I'll look at it from the financial perspective; after all this is a finance forum, and most of us are finance professionals.
Typical night at the Strip club:
entry fee: $15-$20 at most strip clubs
Drinks: $8-$12 (please note that in some states like NJ and some strip clubs NY alcohol is prohibited hence your drinks will most like be a water bottle, juice or pretty "shitty "coffee" not your sbux espresso drinks).
Tip to the "Bartender": $2-$3
Now that we got our drinks( since its a requirement at the strip club to buy a drink,) we move to the stage to see some strippers, and their shows. In here we can spend 40 mins to 2 hours; so you will most likely drop anywhere between $80-$200 during this part of our strip club visit.
In between dances you will most like have strippers come around and offer to give you dance for 5 minutes for $20 (oh the joy I'm gonna have a semi-naked woman rub herself against me for a whole 5 minutes wohoo!!). After the dance you give her at $5 dollar tip, and at most you will get 2 dances at the strip club.
At the end of the night, you will most likely have spent between $150-$300, and you will be left with a massive boner, and blue balls .
Both of which you will have to take care of, on your own by fapping to videos in pornhub.
Quite frankly instead of dropping that much money to get cock teased, I'll go to a massage parlor and get a happy ending or I'll drill the shit out of my "masseuse" or I'll get a hooker, at least I'm getting some value for my $, but that's just my opinion.
If I could get some feedback from my fellow monkeys on this matter I would appreciate it.
maybe you need a visit to "strip club" in another country, some fun ones in Rio.
"fun" is an understatement by the way
the strip club is a great environment to chill with your bro's and generally if you're getting a "massive boner and blue balls" you haven't "touched" too many women to begin with
so whether you're in the strip club or a real club your net booty = 0
no matter how you look at, all your profitability margins will therefore be = 0 (booty/$spent, booty/time spent, etc)
now get out there and help these girls keep the lights on, slugger
I generally agree. They're fun the first few times you go to them when you're younger and it's a new experience, then you realize you're just dropping money and getting teased. You could spend the money with a whore, as you stated, or by going the traditional route and spending it on expensive dinners and shit like that instead while trying to get laid.
Although the Rio/Brazil comment (and in other countries) is really spot on. They're basically brothels with unimaginably hot women if that's your thing. But the mid level strip club in Jersey is pretty fucking bad. And one of the worst things you can do in life is to see what a strip club looks like with the lights on. Makes you want to have boiled your clothes and taken a bath in bleach.
I firmly believe you're starting to create a bias against strip clubs due to unpleasant experiences from the ones you have visited so far buddy.
Strip clubs are generally a great place to take your mind off the world and live reality in a different perspective. Although I do agree that if you keep re-visiting them it might become a little tedious, but that is just like anything in life; not strip clubs particularly.
Personally, I feel able to think more clearly sometimes and tackle questions in a way that I don't on an ordinary day. It is also a great time to hang out with your buddies. Besides, I think you're not appreciating the beauty of naked woman dancing enough; learn to enjoy the little things more.
Anyhow, if you wanna change the concept that you created for strip clubs, I would suggest you take a trip to Brazil, or any South American country to be honest, latino women are just absolutely gorgeous. (Haven't had the chance to go to strip clubs in other parts of the world).
In Brazil, with that budget of $150-$300, I can GUARANTEE you're going to be able to walk in there, order enough drinks to get you hammered 3x, choose the best goddamn hooker in the establishment and bang her brains out for an entire night either in the club itself or on a motel close by. In fact, I don't even think you're gonna want to bang her as they're so fucking good during sex that all you need to do is sit the hell down and watch that devilish stunning woman ride you and look you in the eyes in ways you have not seen before. The lustful aura that those women have is intoxicating, truly.
The only way you're gonna see your balls after a night in a place like that is mushy and dried up begging for a week of rest.
"Zen and the Art of Strip Clubs?"
Go to Eastern Europe. Poland, Bratislava and Slovenia. Some of the most gorgeous women in the world.
Yes siiir slovenia is on my to-go list for a while now
OPs name is "Colombianmonkey", I'm sure he's familiar
I went to one of those places in Bogota once called "Lewinsky's", the name itself was worth popping in for. They're called "piscinas" there, which is Spanish for "swimming pool", which is a little cringeworthy. But anyways, I told the hostess I wasnt interested in a girl and just wanted to hangout and have a few drinks. She smiled and nodded, looked to the waiter who came to my table with a drinks menu. He then pulled a massive sack of yay out, held it to my face and said "$20,000 pesos" ($10 US), which is all I have to say about that night...
Lmao.. sorry bout that.
Don't let it get to you, legit Colombian girls are goddesses.
I have visited a couple of brothels back home but only the high scale ones if you go to a cheap spot be ready to go for a check up next morning, a friend of mine had a herpes scare a couple of years ago. After that he would rather spend a bit more for better quality.
+1 SB Very well written
Been there, and I wasn't particularly impressed.
If you've got halfway decent game you see as much on girls that are every bit as hot by hitting up a decent mid-level club in NYC or Chicago.....and you get to sleep with her once you get back to your place.
I only have 3 things to say in response to this post: 1) You only don't get "touched" if your ugly. 2) If you leave the club with a massive boner, you're probably not old enough to be there in the first place. 3) If you do happen to get a boner, that's what the VIP room is for.
Haha precisely
I consider myself to be well proportioned I'm just gonna leave it at that.
well see that's where the boner comes into play. Lately strippers seem more aggressive to get you to buy a dance last time I went with my friend she literally came to where we were sitting and she literally grabbed my junk in front of my buddy too bad I declined, and was left with a massive boner for the rest of the night. My buddy on the other hand fell for that trick so easily,and burned a huge hole on his wallet that night.
I hate strip clubs as well but sometimes you will find a girl who is bored and willing to have conversation And dance her tail off without charging you per minute. If you have a bit of "game" strip clubs can sometimes be a positive experience.
Bingo. Those girls like to party after closing and why not roll with that? It's not that difficult to party with strippers.
"Touching is not allowed" lol
They're places of entertainment, like a movie theater or stadium...not rocket science here
Not only are you a very odd boy, you also hold a VERY PUZZLING STANCE ON PUNCTUATION
I'm Latin American, and despite spending almost 12 years in the states some habits are hard to change/ correct. Also whenever I write a credit report for work I put it through grammarly to get checked, and or I'll have someone else proofread it. Lastly before I get a smart ass response yes in Latin America writing run on pagraphs is common if you can read Spanish, read one chapter of a book written in Spanish and then compare to a book on English and you will notice punctuation and language flow it's different.
I’m a personal hater of strip clubs. Recently I was out with some of the manager directors and partners of my firm. We kicked off the night with a bang starting with a fancy lounge, an upscale steakhouse, followed by more drinks. Around midnight one of the (married) guys gets the bright idea that we should hit the strip club. The decision flowed unanimous given how inebriated everyone was. We get to said (elite) strip club and are greeted by a gorilla in a suit. One guy ponies up some grease money to jump ahead of the line forming outside. We are then escorted inside.
These guys I work with are coming off as virgins finding their first playboy mag. It’s like the last t*tty they saw was the one they sucked on as an infant. Before I divulge more into the night, let me just say that the bimbos on stage were far from the elite status this club held itself out to be. I mean, I’ve slayed hotter chicks. Why on earth am I spending so much of my precious capital on these wannabe HCBs? Peer pressure is a mufugga.
Anyways, these guys get a spot near the stage and we are instantly flocked given we’re new blood. These girls must have missed their calling as Amway MLM recruiters. They are mindfugging all of my coworkers into thinking pure bliss is just a champagne room away. “You can’t buy sex here, but you can buy the private room where anything can happen wink wink.” The MDs, who have probably not been laid since the market crash, are eating it up and spending money faster than a BOM would make it rain. I kicked back and enjoyed a cold beverage and kept my composure in the face of my superiors. Lapdances were like crack as they kept throwing more and more at these 7s at best.
So let me get this straight. Thousands are being thrown only to get all aroused with no relief? Sounds like a fun night to me!! Give me a classy nightclub and I’d have girls exponentially hotter eating out of my hand whom also don’t have apprehensions to horizontal exertion after getting thrown around a dance floor.
All in all it was BSDlike display of power/money/AJ at Cain/etc, but it was such a front. Like one member posted, these girls are skilled at separating lonely saps from their singles. They then go home and f*ck their boyfriends.
To all the suckers supporting single mothers, this posts’ for you!
+1. Well said !
Bookmarked the thread solely for the four mentioned countries where strip clubs are actually worth going to. If anyone has other countries to add, feel free.
Don't know if the UK has been mentioned but the strip clubs in London are excellent. A little pricey, but the quality of women+their willingness to do anything for a price (even against club rules)+the upscale, friendly vibe (had as much fun hanging w/ the dudes there as I did w/ the dancers) = multiple visits. I spent 3 out of 7 nights my last visit exploring the clubs there and was not disappointed. A little embarrassed at what I spent but would probably do it again given the opportunity. On the other hand it ruined it for clubs back home. I don't even bother.
I don't trust any man who starts with "First of all, I consider myself to be a very manly guy with the same type of personality, traits, and hobbies that most warm blooded males have."
Zero interest in strip clubs. They seem to be the sexual equivalent of advertisements, hitting the receptors in the brain that confuse seeing something as touching/fucking.
As for the actual touching/fucking component, I've got too much empathy to enjoy that. I'm not turned on by a girl who I know would probably prefer to be doing something else with someone else, but for her need for the money.
If you can't touch the girls, you haven't been to Atlanta. Also, some strip clubs are practically an escape from reality. Drinks, hot girls, cigars. You have to experience southern strip clubs to know the difference.
Some people go to strip clubs to take girls back to hotels. A lot of that goes on at the lower end clubs
All of us Sales guys go on Thursday night.
We have a competition to the guy who takes the Stripper home. $100. If they win, most of it goes to the penicillin shot they have to get lol.
Love strip clubs when you have the money for them.
Institutional sales?
Does happen lol.
Rarely does anyone take one home but don't think we won't gamble on the idea of it. Probably 1/5 visits someone takes a stripper home srs.
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