Annoying Secretary

I am an intern and my seat was recently moved, I now sit next to the secretary. I cant begin to tell you how fucking obnoxious she is. She doesnt shut up and makes fun of her boss nonstop to me, I just humor her but what I really want to say is "SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY!" Anybody have similar problem?

 

Sorry can't say I feel your pain. The company I'm interning at this summer had an office open for pretty much the same window of time that I'm here for...and it's next door to my boss so they thought it'd be smart to set me up here. Of course, I had to put up with some annoyed/upset looks from some junior guys on the team that felt jilted. Maybe you should discretely record her comments about her boss and leave the tape in his office...I bet you won't be sitting by her anymore

 
laxn103:
I am an intern and my seat was recently moved, I now sit next to the secretary. I cant begin to tell you how fucking obnoxious she is. She doesnt shut up and makes fun of her boss nonstop to me, I just humor her but what I really want to say is "SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY!" Anybody have similar problem?

Dude. be nice to the secretary - its likely that she will know who you are and the boss won't. So come review time, he'll come over to her desk and ask "Do you know who that Joe bloggs kid is" and that's where having her like you makes a helluva lot of difference. Do not underestimate the power of the PA :)

____________________________________________________________ "LIVING THE DREAM 24/7 ON http://THEALLNIGHTER.BLOGSPOT.COM" ____________________________________________________________
 

there is a secretary that sits a couple of cubes away from me, very nice girl whom I get along with very well. But, she chews on ice all day. All fucking day, crunch, crunch, crunch. She chews on it with her mouth open every fucking day and if it weren't for my iphone I would have taken my left shoe off and thrown it at her numerous times this summer. Just thought I would share that.

 
mdr24:
..if it weren't for my iphone I would have taken my left shoe off and thrown it at her numerous times this summer.

Nice "iphone" product placement. How much is Apple paying you to advertise on the board?

"Cut the burger into thirds, place it on the fries, roll one up homey..." - Epic Meal Time
 

Tell him to shut the fuck up...push him down the stairs...do something to his food/drink, so hes sick for a week or month...get him fired...

If you really believe this person stands in the way of better performance and your future, well destroy him. Don't get caught though.

 

I doubt that will work in real life - The Office sadly isn't real life. I would believe that setting a fake fire alarm off wouldn't go over well with my MD :)

@grandpabuzz - He's making a reference to a TV show called The Office...how reclusive are you to not have seen it?

 

switch his mouse buttons so that left is right... always funny (unless he is trading and loses money as a result... big no no lol)

also, save the hole punches from your hole puncher... than when he leaves one day, slip them in his umbrella so that they shower over him when he opens it outside

if he wears glasses, and leaves them on the desk at any point, just squeeze the lenses with your fingers to make them all blurry... doing so repeatedly will cause him to think he has a vision problem

finally, if pranking isn't your thing, just stab him in the jugular in the middle of work one day... you shouldn't have to work with annoying people

looking for that pick-me-up to power through an all-nighter?
 

lets all face it...your gonna have annoying people working next to you wherever you go and whatever you do...number one rule my business teachers repetitively state:

PEOPLE SUCK

 

"just stab him in the jugular in the middle of work one day... you shouldn't have to work with annoying people" this is true LIBOR, but he needs to ask himself if he considers getting raped work.

I'll have to try the hole punch one.

 

I think it's a good personal quality being able to handle people of all types. Annoying people are everywhere, although some people are annoying/distracting beyond belief.

That being said, LIBOR's prank ideas are hilarious.

 

Sounds familiar. Those of you who work in JP's IBD may know of a certain individual. Always getting up close to you, talking about "bossing out," constantly hating on people...super annoying

 

Come on you gotta have better pranks than that. You could always superglue his mouse to the desk. If he has a wireless keyboard take the receiver out and switch it with the other annoying people in the office. (I did this once with everyones, and it was hilarity trying to figure out which mouse was controlling which computer.) You could remove the screws that hold his chair onto the wheels so that when he pushes back he will fall out of his chair. You could arrange for a sex line to call him at his desk. You could use his email to sign up for an endless stream of promotional products.

Pretty much you need to man up and quit being a submissive little punk and hit him, figuratively or literally.

Follow the shit your fellow monkeys say @shitWSOsays Life is hard, it's even harder when you're stupid - John Wayne
 

Is this assistant, by chance, exceptionally good looking? At 8 meals per day, I'd be surprised...

As for my coworkers, I have no real complaints (small office). Worst case is inadequate communication/instruction: e.g. "update the debt spreadsheet and send it to me ASAP" - I hate having to ask for clarification during a fire drill.

 
FeelingMean:
Our receptionist laughs like Kendra Wilkinson all day, for no reason. "Ahhh hahaha"

Gets annoying after a while...

Our receptionist doesn't put out (she hawwt), that gets annoying too.....
"After you work on Wall Street it’s a choice, would you rather work at McDonalds or on the sell-side? I would choose McDonalds over the sell-side.” - David Tepper
 

a coworker treats the office as a socializing spot.. takes personal calls loudly (talking to her nieces/nephews, personal family bickering stuff,) and is really into apparently any reality show on tv.. discusses it with anyone she can loudly.. all the time belittling the snooty people on the reality shows.. I dont care what you think of Brittany on real housewives, dammit!!

 

We have a real gem of a lady who calls her relatives back home every day and just argues loudly with them nonstop. "Back home" in this case is some Caribbean island and she uses the work line so she doesn't get charged exorbitant fees for international calls. Pretty sure she's cost the firm a small fortune by now. We're all wondering why nobody from management or HR has sat her down and had a chat with her yet...

 

I used to have a co-worker who disagreed with everything I'd say. Even if I was complimenting him!

Me: "Hey. Nice day out."

Annoying Co-worker (ACW): "Meh, I've seen better."

Me: "I saw that your favorite sports team did well last night. Congrats."

ACW: "What are you talking about? They suck."

Me: "Hey, great work yesterday. I thought it was a really impressive presentation."

ACW: "It wasn't my best."

Me: "Hey, I think I'm going to go to McDonald's for lunch."

ACW: "That's gross. How do you eat that? I'm going to [some health food place]."

Me: "Yeah, that's definitely better food."

ACW: "It's not better. McDonald's is just gross."

Me: "Yeah, I see your point. McDonald's is kind of gross."

ACW: "It's not all bad! I like their fries and burgers and stuff."

Me: "Ok..."

I eventually got to the point where I stopped talking to him. It was either stop talking to him or make a huge scene where I blow up at him.

Array
 

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