I realized that I'm just not a very social person. I thought I would become more social as I grew older but nothing changed. I can start conversations and small talk but that's it; the conversations don't last very long. I'm also not that great at presenting and usually get nervous. This hurts me because I've always loved finance (investing, concepts in the stock market, etc.) and I'm interested in moving up through the career ladder.
Are there any finance jobs that could be for me?
Find a quant role. Most finance jobs (or jobs in general) require office politics, stuff like that. If you are really good you could just do your thing.
I'd suggest just trying to become more social. All the things you describe are essentially phobias. IMO, an enriching life involves people and relationships.
You can be awkward. You can be an introvert. You can be a Trekkie. You can tell corny jokes. But you have to be a nice person.
Quants tend to be more accepting of outliers and a little less picky in their friends. But at the end of the day they have friends and they're nice people.
For the record, there's a difference between being introverted and antisocial. Many institutional broker dealers are extroverted but antisocial. People tend to become antisocial when they have a job that makes them unhappy. Us quants will grind our teeth about how we have the most intellectually challenging jobs on the trading floor but earn half as much money as everyone else, but at the end of the day, we're pretty happy. Our jobs take less out of us and it's one big puzzle after another. So I think to first equate antisocial with introverted and then to conclude that quants are antisocial is a bit of an unfortunate mischaracterization.
I also recommend Lillian Glass's book "Attracting Terrific People". Dale Carnegie is obviously a must-read book, but Glass provides a more recent update for life in the post-modern world. It's not just about making friends, but making friends who are a good fit for you and forging genuine relationships.
Instead of running from your fears why not confront them head on? Force yourself into social setting that are uncomfortable to you and learn to adapt. In time you'll have no issue holding lasting conversations and making presentations.
It sounds like you are looking at this from a very black and white perspective (i.e., you are great or you are terrible). It doesn't sound like you break out into a cold sweat at the Chipotle counter when telling Hipster A what you want to order for lunch, which is a start.
I would suggest not giving a shit what others think and try to slowly push yourself out of your comfort zone (raising your hand to speak in class, joining Toastmasters, practice in the mirror, spitting game at the snow bunny at the bar, etc.). In order to succeed, you'll have to embrace talking/communicating on a somewhat sophisticated level.
If you need further inspiration, just watch Elon Musk speak:
//www.youtube.com/embed/zet-X_7MG_Q
Very successful, but still has problems communicating at times. You don't have to be Jordan Belfort riling up the troops, but enough to convey the point across.
Accounting is the best place for introverts, though any position you move up in, you'll ultimately be dealing with other people (selling your ideas, selling your service, etc).
Tons of room in finance for antisocial people.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antisocial_personality_disorder
Most people misunderstand what antisocial means. It does not mean that your introverted. To the contrary, antisocial people are usually very social. This is what antisocial means:
"Apparently I'm volatile, self-obsessed, and don't play well with others." -- Tony Stark from the Avengers
Before answering your question: what do you do on Friday night? How large/small is your casual social circle? Do you come from a big/small family?
There's a bunch of categories you could fit into, and likely more than one concurrently. ANTIsocial, Asocial, introverted, extroverted but shy, etc. The only roles that have zero human interaction in finance are the guys sitting at home trading their own account. If you want to get into and survive in a financial organization, you WILL interact with other people, so maybe share a bit more about who you are inside so I can zero in on some suggestions.
@broadstbully nailed it
-take baby steps...raising your hand to speak/answer questions in class. Try striking up a convo with a random person while waiting in line somewhere (gas station, bank, food place)...if that still bothers u, do it when your on the other side of town or in a different city.
I agree I think if you want to be successful and climb up the ladder you need to work on coming out of your shell more. Not being overly social is okay until it comes across as being rude or ignorant! I'd agree though that accounting is probably the best area for you
As others mentioned, accounting and some quant roles are pretty much golden for you. However, you'll definitely have to interact with folks sooner or later.
Do you have any interests that other people have (e.g. hobbies, March Madness, etc.)?
I was very antisocial, but I have learned to break out of my shell for business development. I had originally begun transitioning via cold calls for internships. The more I did, the more comfortable I became. I also went to a few career fairs and spoke with companies that I didn't have interest in for practice. After working at my current job for a while, I have listened to my boss speak on calls and at networking events and this has helped tremendously. The transition will not happen overnight, but it is possible.
As a reference, I used to walk around with ear buds in my ears all the time and most of the time, I didn't even have it connected to my mp3, I just wanted to avoid conversations and pretend I didn't hear others.
I spent several years in Big 4 accounting and while there were many, many more introverts, you MUST be social to be successful. Networking is a must as partners are required to help win business. Sounds to me like you might benefit from taking some networking classes and/or working with a career counselor to learn some strategies.
For a low cost start I would read the book "How to Win Friends and Influence People". There are a LOT of strategies for extending conversations in that book. The biggest tip is to ask people questions about themselves. You can just sit back and listen!
I think most comments here are easier said than done.
There's a "30 day challenge" for becoming more comfortable with strangers. PM if you are interested in reading it (ill send it via email).
It's a large file. I don't think I can attach it within a comment.
PM me and id be happy to send it over.
First, I think some people above alluded to the fact that you're introverted, (probably) not antisocial. I think you can get better at this by just forcing yourself out there in non-threatening venues. Maybe try something like getting wasted and going clubbing - seems counterintuive but an environment where everyone else is going nuts makes it easy for you not to feel self conscious throwing yourself out there, and over time you'll get less self conscious, even sans alcohol.
As to your question, as far as I can tell a lot of Wall Street is perfectly fine for introverted people. You basically want to target more analytically focused and less client facing roles. That means structured products/ quant trading and hedge funds. Quick breakdown:
Sales - Not for you, don't bother Banking - Can get away with it at analyst level by putting your head down and grinding, but you'll always be at a disadvantage Trading - Varies widely. Probably not a cash equities desk for you, but there are a lot of desks that tend to be 'put your head down and grind on a model'. These will tend to be a bit more prop (yes, I know thats going away somewhat) and/or quant. Consider structured products, exotic options, and some currency and commodity desks. You'll find plenty of hardcore not that social geeks PE/VC - Basically same as banking, you can do it but will be at a disadvantage Hedge Funds - Plenty of very introverted people in investing roles, since its more about analyzing/ making decisions and less about clients, etc.
Life will generally be easier if you can at least fake extroversion, but you can be 100% fine as a Wall Street introvert.
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