Asked friend to set me up with her friend..

ZenMaster's picture
Rank: Baboon | 162

I asked one of my friends from college to set me up with one of her friends, or not even that, when I introduce myself to this girl, whether I should say we have a mutual friend. She coldly said no.

Some friend, right? Clearly I should get rid of this 'friend' right?

Comments (34)

Dec 16, 2012

guess she thought you'd reflect badly on her

Dec 16, 2012

But we've been friends for like 4 years. And if I reflect that badly, why the fuck are we still hanging out?

Dec 16, 2012

She fed some bullshit about how that girl is very conservative and wont appreciate the gesture or attention.

Dec 16, 2012

What are you trying to communicate with the rest of us? You're making no sense at all.

Dec 16, 2012
Working9-5:

What are you trying to communicate with the rest of us? You're making no sense at all.

Sorry, a little frustrated. I guess I was trying to determine whether anyone else had a similar situation and how they handled it. I'm new to the city where my friend is and I figured she would help, so I'm disappointed and quite angry that she thinks so little of me.

Dec 16, 2012

Not necessarily, unless the definition of a "friend" to you is the ones who will set you up with girls.

Maybe she doesn't think you guys are suitable/you are not a good candidate for her to put herself out there for you. That doesn't mean she can't be a friend though...But since she doesn't really give further explaination and only says no...then she prob doesn't think of you as friend anyways

Dec 16, 2012
Mr.Saxman:

Not necessarily, unless the definition of a "friend" to you is the ones who will set you up with girls.

Maybe she doesn't think you guys are suitable/you are not a good candidate for her to put herself out there for you. That doesn't mean she can't be a friend though...But since she doesn't really give further explaination and only says no...then she prob doesn't think of you as friend anyways

I suppose that makes sense. She didn't directly say no like I mentioned (a little dramatic on my part) but she danced around the issue and what hit home was that she explicitly said not to mention I know her, if I make a play myself.

Dec 16, 2012

She probably has a crush on you and wants you to herself.

Dec 16, 2012

THis has nothing to do here
Go and talk to your 'friends'

Dec 16, 2012
nori90:

THis has nothing to do here
Go and talk to your 'friends'

You're free to not post if you have no feedback.

Dec 16, 2012

sounds like a question for yahoo answers

Dec 18, 2012
fuzzywuzzy:

sounds like a question for yahoo answers

hahah how elementary, everyone knows to Ask Jeeves

Dec 16, 2012

She's obviously jealous. I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

Dec 16, 2012
BTbanker:

She's obviously jealous. I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

I'm not sure. There was a vibe between us when we first met but I dont see it. I'm just not sure what the problem is.

Dec 16, 2012
BTbanker:

She's obviously jealous. I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

Seriously. The only case in which this would happen is if your friend is your wingwoman.

Either way, forget your so-called "friend" (who even told you not to mention her name if you ever get at her friend) and just go for it.

Dec 17, 2012
EtherBinge:
BTbanker:

She's obviously jealous. I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

Seriously. The only case in which this would happen is if your friend is your wingwoman.

Either way, forget your so-called "friend" (who even told you not to mention her name if you ever get at her friend) and just go for it.

I think I probably will, but I'm figuring out how to do it without looking like an idiot. She is pretty hot to forego.

Dec 16, 2012
BTbanker:

She's obviously jealous. I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

The only time I'd ask a chick to hook me up with one of her friends is if I wanted said chick in the first place. Girls love a little competition and I've used variations of this a few times successfully.

    • 1
Dec 17, 2012
Cruncharoo:
BTbanker:

She's obviously jealous. I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

The only time I'd ask a chick to hook me up with one of her friends is if I wanted said chick in the first place. Girls love a little competition and I've used variations of this a few times successfully.

Really? I dont like my friend in that way (although she is pretty) but perhaps maybe she feels that this is my endgame. Any tips on how to dispel this notion? The other girl really does seem like someone I could hit it off with but I am concerned about how my friend said she isnt the type to randomly accept dates, etc. Not sure what she means really.

Dec 30, 2012
Cruncharoo:
BTbanker:

She's obviously jealous. I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

The only time I'd ask a chick to hook me up with one of her friends is if I wanted said chick in the first place. Girls love a little competition and I've used variations of this a few times successfully.

This. Women are jealous (subconsciously; and for the most part) this was probably the best way to get your 'friends' attention - when she realized you wanted to date (or whatever) weighed up your best option, and decided not only that it wasn't her, but that she would make a great 'go-between'. Many women don't need to be interested in you to want you to be interested in them. After that button has been pushed you can pretty much forget about getting her help with the fix up. Perhaps I've been dramatic here to get to the point quickly. I'm not saying it's right, or makes much sense, but that is how women work.

"Dont compromise yourself; you're all you've got" - Janis Joplin

Dec 17, 2012
BTbanker:

I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

Any reason why?

Dec 17, 2012
ZenMaster:
BTbanker:

I'd never ask a chick to set me up with another one.

Any reason why?

Could make the friendship awkward if I'm not trying to get with her.

Dec 16, 2012

The problem here isn't about the girl. The problem is the lack of explanation. Scrap it, you're meant for better.

Dec 17, 2012
Culcet:

The problem here isn't about the girl. The problem is the lack of explanation. Scrap it, you're meant for better.

Exactly. That's kind of how I felt. I thought we were good friends but obviously I'm rethinking the past couple of years.

Dec 16, 2012

Who cares what she says? Go talk to the girl anyways...

Dec 17, 2012
ixjunitxi:

Who cares what she says? Go talk to the girl anyways...

There lies the problem. I'm new to the city and only know where the girl works (at a law firm, where my brother in law works too) so its hard to engage with her unless I literally stalk her.

Dec 18, 2012

Guys, I'm bumping this. My friend isnt responding to me anymore so not sure what the issue is. I guess I could move on but I do want to know if there's something there with her friend.

I just dont know how to connect with her without my friend. I dont give a shit, I will mention her name but the first point of contact seems difficult to me right now. I browsed my friends Facebook and found her there. Problem is I cant seem to make contact with her there. Any suggestions? Anything else I can think of makes me feel a little creepy lol

Dec 18, 2012

If there's no immediate way of meeting the chick (e.g. school, etc.), forget it.

Don't badger your friend too much. It makes you come off as desperate. Move on.

Dec 28, 2012
EtherBinge:

If there's no immediate way of meeting the chick (e.g. school, etc.), forget it.

Don't badger your friend too much. It makes you come off as desperate. Move on.

Thanks. I havent asked my friend since. I'm going to just see if I happen to bump into her somewhere and then go from there. As she kinda knows me, I found on her Facebook, hopefully that gets the ball rolling.

Dec 28, 2012

Still not sure how to proceed with my friend. We've had brief contact since then but still weird she thinks I'm almost not good enough for her friends.

Dec 30, 2012

.

Dec 30, 2012

why don't you straight up ask her what the deal is. once she's honest with you, you'll know where the problem lies.

Dec 31, 2012
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Jan 1, 2013
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