College Junior needs advice- Unique Situation

Hey, so I am a currently a junior at a Semi target

My background: The last three years I have been your typical college nerd. I have a great GPA. I have had 3 internships (at a F10 company, a boutique IB and PE firm). I am sure everyone here would say I am set for a junior SA recruiting, but I have realized after a couple SA interviews with BB's that I have social anxiety and have very low self esteem. I was so focused on internships and grades the last couple years, and didn't do much else. My plan now is to really enjoy the rest of the school year and join a fraternity and then study abroad during the summer because I feel like I am not in the right mindset to go through IB SA recruiting right now and don't have the social skills to even pass these interviews.

my question for you guys is how much will not having a Junior SA effect me for FT recruiting?

 

You're shooting yourself in the foot. Without junior SA, especially if you mention that you joined a frat and studied abroad because of social anxiety problems during interviews, FT recruiting will be impossible. Think about it this way: why would any bank even give you an interview when they have hoards of resumes from students with SAs?

Just try to be more outgoing. You could start small and try to talk to ten random people every day or join some clubs that interest you. Meetup.com is also great for this. Good luck.

 
Best Response

As someone who was in Greek life, I wouldn't advise joining that late. Being Greek was amazing Freshman and Sophomore years, mediocre Junior year, and kind of boring Senior year. Pledging also has a habit of negatively impacting your grades.

You don't have to change who you are completely. If you're a shy nerd, be a shy nerd. Find other shy nerds who like shy nerd activities, hook up with shy nerd girls you meet at these activities, and before you know it, you will be far less shy than you started out as. You'll just be a nerd, and hell, that's in these days. If you really want to change things up a bit, hit the gym some and go get a good haircut. You'd be surprised by the amount of confidence simple things can give a person.

Don't ruin your chances for your future with a quarter life crisis though in some "self betterment" adventure.

Commercial Real Estate Developer
 

Your situation is hardly unique. In fact, it's quite typical. Especially for undergrads going out and networking with 20 and 30 something bankers.

Don't join a frat. Just join toastmasters or just go out and make more friends. There are also behavioral/cognitive therapies available- namely exposure therapy.

I'm a geeky quant with a CS undergrad. I got picked on in junior high and I don't enjoy networking with a bunch of fast talking people who expect you to be totally outgoing and have perfect social skills. I get it. And I could never work in sales. And I sense that you're nervous about interviewing and recruiting- perhaps trying to avoid or delay it with this whole frat idea. But again, the best therapy is exposure, and the best way out is through.

FWIW, I had to go out to NY by myself at age 20 for several hours of interviews at a big NY bank with my own social anxiety issues. It was the first time I flew by myself, stayed in a hotel by myself, and my first time in NYC. After that, stepping up to a steep launch site with a hang glider and charging over a cliff really didn't seem that scary.

It seems scary right now- maybe like going to college when you were in HS, but it's also a growing opportunity. This isn't war. This isn't even a public speech. You'll get through this and you'll be stronger for it.

Be strong, get as much practice as you can, exercise the night before, and good luck to you. It gets easier with time and practice. Remember it's an opportunity not a threat.

 

OK, there's a consensus that you're practicing avoidance and that the best course of action is to take a deep breath like you've done before and say

"All right, I'm jumping in the water. Let's see if I can swim." "All right, I'm going to daycare/kindergarten. Bye Mom." "All right, I'm joining the swim team." "All right, I'm getting a summer job." "All right, I'm going to college." "All right, there's no avoiding it-- I'm going to network and do these interviews."

Every time you did one of those things it seemed really scary- the unknown, the possibility for people to judge you. The good news with interviewing and networking is that you'll never have to see the people who judge you negatively again. And in most cases you've experienced it's not as bad as you think and it gets easier with time.

 

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