Depressed and not wanting to go on
I am so broken, lost, desperate, and can barely get up in the morning or fall asleep at night. I am so alone no one cares about me I hate my fucking life. Every day is a struggle. I am so afraid of seeking help I don't want to lose my job. I don't want to see a therapist because I'm afraid of having to take time off and being a failure. I feel so weak. Everything is a façade.
I cry myself to sleep every night and I keep looking at the pills and knives I have but I'm too big of a pussy and fuck to not want to wake up tomorrow.