5/10/07

All I seem to read on here is about the poor guy who works 14 hours a day and makes 80k. Isn't there anyone on here who works 10 hours a day, makes high 6 digits and is just "ballin"? I wanna hear some of the good stories!

Comments (13)

5/10/07

if thats what you're lookin for you're definitely on the wrong career message board

Investment Banking Interview Course

5/10/07

yury, i think you might want to rethink why you want to go into this industry.

5/10/07

Oh I want to get into the industry because it's something I genuinely find interesting, specifically the PE part. I just wanted to hear a more "upbeat" story to counteract all these "guys...I have a model due at 9 am and it's 3 am" stories. They're interesting and realistic but can we at least have a 1 to 40 ratio? One positive story for each arduous work story?

5/10/07

"Oh I want to get into the industry because it's something I genuinely find interesting, specifically the PE part. "

Hello? Just go into private equity...as an intern first, of course...

Yeah, why don't you read "Monkey Business"? It'll raise your morale.

5/10/07

come on man, you know titles of books are supposed to be underlined, not put in quotes. you are going to mess this kid up.

5/10/07

Yea this one time, the bank took us to a Yankees game, of course about 45 minutes into the game I was watching the game alone because all the other interns had been called back to the office.....I had turned off my Blackberry so I was spared....

5/10/07

"you are going to mess this kid up."

Don't worry, this little kid will wake up some day....he just needs some encouragement.

Maybe include the words "ballin'" "high six-figures" "I'd like to use excel 10 hours a day" in his rejected cover letter...

5/10/07

heres a "positive" story on banking. on the day i got my bonus, i went out and bought the biggest plasma TV i could find.

5/10/07

" i went out and bought the biggest plasma TV i could find."

Too bad you can't watch it much. And that's all the pussy yall' gonna get...

5/10/07

go into sales and trading

5/10/07

"For those of you not in the know, Financial Analysts are those bright, promising, and often attractive college classmates of yours who disappeared into someplace called Douche Bank or Golden Slacks after graduation and from whom you have not heard since. Sometimes you will run across one in the street, usually late at night when you are stumbling home from a hot nightspot with some smokin' cutie on your arm and images of the Kama Sutra running through your head. Invariably, you are shocked and (temporarily) sobered by their altered appearance: pasty complexion, dark circles under the eyes, slouched posture, and a furtive, shifty expression marked alternately by booming bonhomie and snarling, sobbing cynicism. My God, you think to yourself, what happened to Jock/Bif/Muffy? You promise to stay in touch, and you even leave a voice mail or two at their home or office, but you are frankly relieved when they do not call you back.

Well, let me tell you why that Golden Girl or Golden Boy has sunk so low: they have been through the Mother of All Wringers, my friend, and they are lucky to be alive. (The image that pops into my head is the old Hustler magazine cover with a woman's legs being put through a meat grinder, but then again I am probably older and certainly less politically correct than you.) You know that old phrase, "S**t flows downhill"? Well, Dear Reader, your college drinking buddy is sitting at the very bottom of a veritable mountain of aromatic ordure that an army of Associates, Vice Presidents, Managing Directors, and Important Clients is busy shoveling downhill at him or her as fast as they possibly can.

Among you Dear Readers, there will still be some of you whose Sympathy-O-Meters are flickering at "Feeble," since you have heard that your friend is raking in approximately three to five times what you and your other college friends are making. This is probably true. Nevertheless, let me remind you of another unfortunately scatological yet apropos chestnut: "Life is like a st sandwich: the more bread you have, the less st you have to eat." In the case of the Financial Analyst, the proportion of fertilizing filler is still way out of whack with the surrounding pumpernickel, no matter how much pumpernickel there is. Hence the tendency for newly minted Financial Analysts to morph in appearance from Rock Hudson to Marty Feldman within three months of starting the job.

Now for the Restored Faith in Humanity bit. You would think that tender young shoots such as these, exposed to the withering blasts of endless pitchbooks and monstrous LBO models demanded 24/7/365 by the clay-footed demigods of High Finance, would eventually shrink and curl into catatonic little blobs. But no. There are someaEU"at least a fewaEU"who toughen their skins, stiffen their spines, and stand forth upon the broken bodies of their fellow Financial Analysts to shout, "Wage slaves of the world, unite!" Or at least, "Up yours, a**hole!" Such youthful bravery and defiance brings a tear to my jaded eye."

5/10/07

^interesting story. I might go read that.

5/10/07
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