Has anyone else had mixed or complicated emotions in response to being paid really well?
At a boutique consulting firm in a tier 2 or below city. About 3 years into the job. I found out this week that I will be getting a promotion to the "Associate Consultant" level. My base salary will be $110K US, and my bonus should be in the region of $30 - 50K. Thankfully my firm's business model is pretty well moated, and they are more willing to pay their people than Big 4 and such.
I know that's really nothing for the scope of WSO, but it feels like a ton of money to me. I was raised in an upper middle class family, so having money isn't new to me. But it's all happened so fast. I was struggling to get an internship just 4 years ago!
So I'm pretty happy about the pay raise. Who wouldn't be? But at the same time, I've also had some other feelings.
- The money I make is making me feel distant from other people. For example, my girlfriend's middle class family would literally spit out their drink if they ever found out how much I make. I have some friends that are doing really well, and a lot that really haven't found their feet at all. It's a pretty big difference to me compared to 5 - 10 years ago, when we were all basically equals in high school.
- I feel guilty that I'm not more grateful to have my job. Especially in this economy. I mean, I have a great attitude. But I have the frustrations any person has in their job. The client being crazy. Getting blamed for stuff that's not my fault. Having to take emails at 9 PM. Those kinds of things. But at least I'm getting paid really well to deal with it!
- Not sure what to do with my money. I have a pretty basic lifestyle. I have upgraded it recently - bought an almost new SUV, etc. But I feel like the amount of money is mind boggling to me, as I was a student a few years ago. Again, I know it's not crazy money for WSO standards. I am always bouncing between saving everything to buy a house soon, vs thinking I should go nuts and enjoy my money. I feel like it's the one point in my life where I don't really have to answer to anyone (kids, other obligations, etc) in terms of how to spend my money. I've considered buying a $5K guitar...
I know this money and my career really ain't much compared to some other people on here, but it's still feeling a bit weird for me. My life has changed so much in just a few years of working.
Any wisdom?
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You're in consulting so you're billing out much more than your pay, so you can't be too sad as the client is really footing the bill.
It’s pretty normal to feel this way, you are making great money and it’s a big change in your life. My advice would be:
1) appreciate it and try to stay grounded: as you said, you are in a good spot. It’s perfectly normal to still get frustrated at work, having a job in a time like this doesn’t make you immune to emotion, but remember that you are in a great situation and appreciate that
2) find the things you enjoy: no amount of money will keep you in a job long term, so make sure you enjoy what you are doing or are on a path that excites you
3) figure out what to do with the money: money buys you some freedom. Freedom to change careers, retire, or take on work/projects that excite you. Map it out a bit, you now have some more flexibility, you may want to volunteer more, or donate money, or just have a plan for retiring early or switching careers. Try to think through what that money gets you.
4) enjoy it but don’t spend just to spend: treat yourself within reason, but don’t let buying the next thing be what makes you happy, that can lead to major lifestyle creep.
Anyway, hope this helps a bit, I’ve been down that road and made many mistakes in spending and planning along the way (as well as not really appreciating what I had and just being constantly stressed)
I feel this way every day. I don't like my job, but it's insanely easy. I work, like, 38(?) hours a week (with telework, not even--like 30-35 in reality) and make a ridiculous salary with insane benefits--and I have 5 weeks of vacation--FIVE. It's truly absurd. I was just talking to a co-worker about this who graduated recently from college but was a manager in retail. He said his retail job was "infinitely" more difficult than our job and paid about 1/5 as much with virtually no benefits.
It's difficult to not feel guilt, but instead of feeling guilty, we should feel grateful. Guilt has its place but serves no purpose in this situation. When we look at our blessings, we should feel grateful to our parents, our good fortune, our country, our predecessors, and our great God for these blessings. And then we should tip well our waiters, bartenders, baristas, barbers, handymen, sandwich artists, etc. and do so with a glad heart.
What do you do?
I work for a Fortune 500 company in their real estate department. It's a totally unfulfillling job and I wish I could do something else, but I definitely have golden handcuffs.
OP - your thoughts/feelings are not unusual at all. Just be grateful and stay humble, but certainly don’t feel guilty!
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