High Schoolers Who Have Been Accepted Into College - How Do you Stay Motivated?
As you may know, I am an older monkey with kids. My oldest is a senior in high school who has applied to many colleges. He has already received acceptance communications along with some scholarships, which is great. However, virtual school and acceptance in colleges has reduced his motivation to do school work.
Anyone else ever been in this situation?
Lol at coming to WSO for parenting advice. This is the real life version of the “hello fellow kids” memes. Of course the OP is made by financeabc.
And why is a bad thing to see how others have handled it? I mean, there are a lot of young people who participate here.
How about a topic dedicated to how affirmative actions sucks. Is that more in your wheelhouse?
Did this make you feel better, honey?
Senioritis, man. Everyone I know has been hit by it; it has nothing to do with COVID (although COVID may have accentuated it). As long as his grades are decent to the point his college acceptances don’t get retracted, he should be fine.
As for motivation, that was always goal oriented. He was motivated to get into colleges. He’s done that, and even if he hasn’t, it’s no longer within his control. In any case, just let him chill he’s been at it for 4 years.
Thank you for the thoughtful reply.
No problem.
I should mention I'm younger than your son.
I’m a little older then your son, but when I was a senior and got into a couple schools I just began to coast. Made sure my grades stayed up so acceptance didn’t get rescinded but just enjoyed the last couple months of high school. Is there really a point in grinding for an A when you get away with a B? He got the grades to get into college already and now there isn’t much benefit to study hard for that A anymore. Plus with covid and all that has come with it, he probably doesn’t feel like doing much, let him be for now. He got into college and as long as he gets back to work during the fall, it’s all good.
I get it. Heck, when I was his age, I more than coasted. I barely showed up for certain classes but I can't tell him that, haha. It is more my wife who is worried about it. Yeah, this year has been fucked up. He does not like virtual school at all.
Can’t blame him for not liking virtual school, it’s his senior year and the things that are supposed to make that year fun and memorable are missing. My brother is also a senior in HS and he has had the same problems as your son, got into college, shows up to classes for attendance and puts the Zoom meeting on mute lmao.
Buy a belt.
Financeabc.
Dealt with it last year with my oldest. We told her either go to all your classes, put in a standard senior effort (like we did when we were seniors) or get a part-time job, pay rent, graduate and don't fuck up your college admission. She actually chose the latter, barely went to class, graduated with B's and paid $450 / month for her last semester of high school.
We held the money and gave it back to her when she left for college.
My brown parents certainly have their issues, but they would have NEVER made me pay rent to live at home. No matter what.
Maybe it’s just a cultural thing.
Yeah but good luck to you if you bring home a white girlfriend. I can envision a very uncomfortable moment followed by lectures about how tradition is important to them
I am not sure that I could be that strict. If I do not get involved, my wife says to get involved. If I am too involved, my wife says give him a break because it is a pandemic.
Honestly feel the same except my grades actually matter still lol rip
I am not sure about how colleges treat the senior year. They must know lots of kids do not take it that seriously. I am hoping they will also consider that this has been a tough year.
There’s usually a bar you have to meet so you don’t get rescinded. Varies by the college so it’s best you call and ask.
Current college senior with a FT banking offer. Have not tried that hard in school since online classes started having had my summer internship offer junior year and especially after getting the return offer. Also have had P/F options throughout that I have used several times. Back in senior year of high school, I probably missed 20-30 days of school after finishing up college applications and still graduated around the top of my class. If I have already reached the end goal, why work unnecessarily hard for no extra gain? I don't see the problem with chilling out a little bit before starting back again on the grind at the beginning of college where grades will start mattering again. That was my approach in high school and doing the same thing now. This is of course assuming a kid has some level of self-motivation when it matters and also that losing motivation doesn't mean literally dropping so hard that it might result in rescinded acceptances.
I'm 24 but I have younger cousins that I'm close with that just started college. Perhaps it's different because we're Brooklyn kids, so for my younger cousins and their friends it's just a continuation of High School online learning. But I think you should just sit down with your son and talk to him man to man and see how he thinks and feels about college at this time. Tell him the truth and say motivation won't get you through college, discipline will. I've read previous replies you've made and you've said your wife is more worried than you are, which is more than fair. But I remember when I first started college, granted it wasn't online, but still as other younger members have said, it's definitely senioritis and I remember a bunch of freshmen friends of mine that straight flunked or did poorly in classes because they thought it was a continuation of high school and they didn't know that they had to get their asses into gear. So I'd also tell your son to watch out for that.
Hope you found this advice helpful and best of luck with your son's journey in virtual college.
meh
Sorry to hear about your personality defect. Unfortunately, there may not be much you can do about it because it is probably genetic.
Current high school senior in a similar situation.
I think it's mostly about finding something exciting to do. After submitting my college applications and receiving a few acceptances, I was reluctant to continue trying in school, especially given the circumstances of online learning. It got to the point where I had 15+ missing assignments and my school was calling my parents every week. I got out of this slump by finding something that I really wanted to learn/explore. For me, it was starting a personal blog. Going into college as an econ/finance major, I realized how little I engaged with econ/finance content ever since I stop caring about school and extracurriculars, compared to all the Netflix shows and Youtube gaming/sports channels I would spend hours watching. So, I decided to start investing more time into reading up on news in finance and the US economy, stock market, etc, formulating an opinion on these topics, and polishing and writing them down in a personal blog. After a couple of weeks of forcing myself to commit to this project, I started to enjoy it, and realized that I'm doing schoolwork so much faster since I actively want to get them out of the way to make time.
Ultimately, I think it comes down to what your son wants to do with the time he has from now until he goes off to college, given the fact that online school gives us so much free time to do other things and that we don't have any extracurricular commitments anymore. On one hand, he could pursue a project or something he's genuinely wanted to do (doesn't have to be academic), but on the other, he could also take it easy and relax, which is totally fine as well. I would just make sure he keeps his grades up at the bare minimum since colleges can rescind him if they fall significantly.
Thanks for sharing all of that and I can relate to what you are saying. He has a few very good outlets that are kind of related to school. These extra curriculars probably got him some acceptances. He has never been on board with the virtual environment.
I’m currently a senior as well. All I did in order to maintain some level of motivation is to made sure that I acknowledge some level of purpose. Whether it’s now or 5 years from now, making sure that all of my actions are directly contributing towards something makes me want to continue doing them with some form of drive. I also wouldn’t be too hard, it’s been an insane year, and college applications definitely took a better chunk out of me than I would like to admit. I just think a balance of self-forgiveness and a goal in mind would do anyone well right now. But then again, might be talking fluff, so obligatory take my opinion with a grain of salt
Staying motivated as an end in itself is silly. You can def slack off post-acceptance. I wouldn't start earning Cs, but an extra B or so isn't gonna matter.
That said, I was a paranoid senior and ended up with just 1 B at the end of senior year! I did, however, ditch AP exams (credits wouldn't count) and went out to brunch with my friends on test days. Good times...
I frankly shocked someone slept with you at least twice. But to answer your question, maybe just talk to your son? Of course he's going to be disinterested in school with this pandemic stopping him from having what has probably been sold to him as the ultimate experience of youth in-person. Small children certainly aren't excited about remote learning, so why on earth would a college-aged kid be when they're having even MORE taken from them? Children are the most robbed by this whole thing, think about how this fucks with their development and view of the world. Plus isolation and all is hardly good for a growing mind.
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That is kind of a creepy intro but okay. Dude, I never had any trouble hooking up with chicks when I was younger, so back off Mr. LBO guy. If you ever want to have a chance with females, I would suggest work on your attitude. The high schoolers here have shown more maturity than you.
Yessir, I did that.
Yikes! I am mostly just trying to find out how the high schoolers feel about this type of situation and they have provided very thoughtful responses.
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