How I got a job at a top Investment Bank
So, I, like, work at this, like totally big investment bank. So, in high school, I was, like, totally slut shamed for sleeping with half of the football team. And I was so oppressed by the white male patriarchy. Because, I mean, when guys sleep around, they are rewarded, but when women sleep around, they are totally slut shamed. And so I organized these, like, slut walks in college.
and I wrote my college essay about how I was raped and sexually harassed. And then I told the police, and destroyed the lives of 5 football players. Girl Power! So I got into Harvard, and I organized more slut walks.
So, like, I was oppressed at Harvard as well. when I got a B in gender studies, I appealed to the dean, and the college lecture, is as you know, totally sexist. So I turnes it to an A. So at the last minute, I applied to a bank, and talked about my experiences with being oppressed by the patriarchy. And how I wanted to transform capitalism and help empower women by working at a top investment bank. And then I got the jobs.
But even now, I see these totally creepy guys try to hit on me. The white male partarchy, and I'm changing it from within
You work at back office in Private Equity try again.
1/10. Pretty poor effort on this one.
Interview
Interviewer: "Walk me through a LBO."
H1B HYP: *sniffles and wipes eyes "All my life I've been so oppressed. All the boys at Harvard were so mean to me and I couldn't pursue my passion in Islamic Studies and I was so depressed *sniffles."
Interviewer: "Your experience is what we need here at Goldman Sachs, you're hired!"
I miss the old times where the Alphas made it far.
Tbh OP makes a good point about girls (not all) wearing clothes as thin as floss then they start bitching about men harassing them. Like you're asking for it.
At work I wear skirts that come above my fingertips. But I WEAR THEM FOR MYSELF. It makes ME feel good. It is not for some weird creepy loser who is sexist agaisnt me. But if that cute football player is staring at me....well that is something else.
Lololol
Never let down with joblessjoe
Like girls are some of the worst species on this planet...I once counted a girl say "like" 58 times in a presentation. Every sentence started with "Like...".
what part of this post did you think was actually funny?
I don't give a fuck about entertaining your autistic ass. It is unfair that some dumb bitch like this can get a job while I can't becasue I was not afforded the opportunities. I had to go to a shit college and then forcced to stay and home and then i went into depresison and messed up college, and now i can't get into a top law school or mba.
This thread is highly inappropriate. You need to rethink what you blast on a public forum.
Not worse than 90% of peoples' Facebook walls.
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