How to control your mouth, when dealing with a boss who's not psychologically healthy.

Hi.  I'm new to the commercial real estate world, NYC. I thought I made a good decision, in choosing my firm.... a little background, my "boss" (probably not the most accurate term) made over 1 mill, last year. From his own commissions.... I didn't know that until after I started working there. But I thought he would be a good person to learn from, things could be a good fit... I come from the fitness community. Proudly. My personal life consists of athletes/former athletes. I've read many books on psychological health, positive psychology, etc. And I have the requisite life experience to write my own book.... The person I work under feels entitled to speak disrespectfully, to me. Cut me off, talk over me, when I barely speak... and I come with wisdom. I come with value. I come with intelligence... also, is preventing me from working the hours that I need, when this is an independent contractor position... I feel like I might intimidate him...  I'm female, but I don't consider it, in any work environment. I hate identity politics. Strongly. With both race and gender, there should be no quotas or consideration for that. I'm all about meritocracy, strong work ethic, noble character. Thats what defines you, or should be considered for hiring.... so I'm not playing any female card here. I simply mention it, because if this owner/"boss," spoke to a  "real man," on the street, the way he has spoken to me... and/or enforced the (non-industry standard) restrictions that he has on me (specifically), simply acting in a bizarre dysfunctional manner.... it would result in violence. He would be floored. I don't view him as a protector. I don't view him as alpha (and yes, I still use that term), so I'm in a very sticky quagmire... I have a hard time constantly silencing myself... or confronting him calmly, and him spitting nonsensical unintelligent lies to my face, while me looking dead in the eye.... I'm a fighter by nature. I love that about myself. And strong men like that. Real leaders appreciate me.... I want to leave ASAP and I will!  I just don't want to leave money on the table. Or waste the work that I started. And I need the money! I need it.... I feel like I'm going to have to tolerate his dysfunction and injustices for a little bit, instead of cursing him out, telling him to go fuck himself, or calling him out vividly/publicly.... Do you guys/ladies have any strategies on how to deal with someone who you surpass in so many ways, yet feels entitled to disrespect you because they're simply good at sales in one niche market, which means very little in the grand scheme of things?   I've been fortunate enough to avoid these type of situations, thus far. And I'd like to continue to do so.  Thank you in advance for sharing your stories or advice.  

 
Most Helpful

The way they act is a function of them, not you. Just tell yourself that. And leave the roll when you can. Not sure how much you’re leaving on the table, but if you wait a year, I imagine you may have more to leave on the table. It’s up to you, but to stick it out, just realize it has everything to do with them being angry at their own life. 

 

Are you the same girl that made the other thread about how you couldn’t work the hours you wanted because your boss didn’t trust you or something?

Anyway, you have a unique writing style and I don’t know if you’re high-functioning bot. Still, if it was me in your situation, I’d the only I can do...which is to network. You just started so how much money are you actually leaving on the table? A better firm, with a better boss will probably net you more money and you’ll actually like going to work.

 

Stop being so full of yourself. Get your head out of your ass and realize you’re gona have bosses you don’t like. Obviously it’s not the same as him speaking to some stranger off the street. If he is crossing any lines then report him or stand up for yourself. Otherwise realize that in a job you need to bite your tongue with your superiors

 

Lol came back a month later to type responses to people that hated on her. Imagine what type of psycho must be behind the screen (if you couldn’t tell by the OP already)

 

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