How to get over this FOMO?

Hi everyone hope everyone is doing well and has a great thanksgiving. 

I am feeling a weird sense of fomo/depression at this moment with my current job prospects. I interned at a BB in NYC and did not receive a return offer to the team I joined due to headcount restrictions (team I was on only gave out 40% of what their usual offer rate has been for the past 5 years). This past full time recruitment really took a toll on my health (mental and physical) and I am so incredibly fortunate to have landed an offer at another BB in a T2 city (LA, Dallas, Miami). However, I feel this really shitty depression about not being in NYC. I am from NYC, born and raised there in all my years and have never envisioned living anywhere else or wanted to live in any other environment. I felt so happy when I received my SA offer in my home city where people always dream about working in college. While I am so happy to be done with recruiting with another prestigious firm, I can't help but feel depressed seeing all these people from other areas of the country get excited about moving to a big city for the first time and experiencing that NYC life in Manhattan (I grew up poor in an outer borough and always dreamed of living in Manhattan) while I am still moving to an amazing city next year but not where I wanted to end up or where I know anyone. I was wondering if anyone else has dealt with this type of feeling for any city. I have so many amazing memories in NYC growing up but feel sad and depressed about not being able to live it out with all my friends. 

 

Yeah - NYC is the best. You could always just work for 2 years in LA or something and then do an MBA at Stern or Columbia to be back in the city and stay in the city. Or get some sort of work transfer within the firm or at a new company in NYC

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

Those are all good cities in their own right. Make the most out of something new for a year or two and then lateral to nyc

 
Most Helpful

Rather than feeling like you've let yourself down, think about the positives. You were able to position yourself such that you didn't have a return offer and got an offer at a comparable bank. Chalk it up to the pandemic or your abilities, you made that happen. So take the offer and if your goal is really to be in the nyc finance scene, that option is totally available to you as long as your recruit for the buyside properly which I'm happy to get into.

It's easy to think that not being in nyc is the end of your scene but just focus on the bigger picture. Realistically, nyc will always be there and when you make the move to our lovely city, you'll have much more fun given you'll probably be in a better financial situation and unfortunately that really matters here. Just focus on killing it with your current offer and get in touch with the nyc headhunters if being back here is of the utmost importance. The fact that you've had time in the city earlier is a huge plus to them

 

Seems like a good way to experience another environment.  Unless you are only investing in NYC located companies, it’s good to see how other people live.  At least a different perspective will help your pattern recognition, investment skillset.

Have compassion as well as ambition and you’ll go far in life. Check out my blog at MemoryVideo.com
 

I have never lived anywhere except for the northeast, so I can appreciate the apprehension about moving away from it.  I have a nephew who graduated from an Ivy but had to take a job in Oklahoma, which is very different from his home state of NJ.  Going to LA, Dallas or Miami sounds okay for a temporary stint.  These places are not exactly bumble fuck USA.  It might be good to experience living in a different state for a while.  You can always come back.  

 

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