Hungover at work.....tips?

Ok, so it's Friday, you made a horrible decision of going out last night and currently look like Chewbacca and smell like regret. Time is incredibly slow and everyone in the office all of a sudden turned into judge Judy... how do you guys handle a hangover at work and do you have any tips for survival.

Update: The last couple of hours have been very volatile. I have discovered a watering hole and fought off the other office mammals, this has significantly increased my chances for survival. I cant say the same about the toilets on the 3rd floor.

I have also started experiencing eye convulsions and minor heart attacks. The mass alienation from the others has not subsided, if anything the pace has greatly picked up.

P.S I don't have cocaine, IV drips or other "vitamins", corporate decided to cut budget this year.

Will keep you updated.

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Comments (15)

Most Helpful
Aug 17, 2018

Two pieces of bad news for you buddy.

  1. Alcohol is metabolised with zero-order kinetics meaning no matter how much you drink, it gets broken down at the same rate. Imagine a funnel. No matter how much water you pour on the open part, it'll flow out at the same rate base on the base diameter. In laymans terms this means not much can be done to speed up the metabolism of the alcohol left in your body.
  2. The handover is mainly caused by the 2nd product of alcohol - aldehydes. There isn't a quick solution to speeding up their breakdown either so you're a bit stuck.

Having said that, to treat some of the symptoms you could eat spicy foods (the capsaicin is a vasodilator and makes you sweat helping you get rid of some of the aldehydes and so forth in your body), drink water (alcohol dehydrates) and get vitamins in you (to replenish some of the vitamins and minerals lost in the dehydration phase).

Good luck champ, avoid any serious meetings today and stay strong. It'll be gone in 6-12 hours

    • 2
Aug 17, 2018

Chug pedialyte

    • 2
Aug 17, 2018

Real talk - I hope you showered and brushed your teeth....and if you haven't, go home and do that right now and make up some type of excuse. Smelling like alcohol / weed is one of the easiest ways to get fired.

Drink a shit ton of water, and get you some good food. You'll be good bro.

Aug 17, 2018

Get a IV drip and you will feel great.
Get cocaine and you will feel greater.

    • 2
Aug 17, 2018

Cocaine IV drip and he'll be set*

*for 15min

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Aug 17, 2018

Down a pedialyte, 1L of water, egg/bacon sandwich, advil, and 2x the normal amount of coffee you normally drink in the morning

Aug 17, 2018

Pedialyte works wonders, you'd be surprised pedialyte, Advil, and a breakfast bar or something of the sort should do the trick

Aug 17, 2018

Update: The last couple of hours have been very volatile. I have discovered a watering hole and fought off the other office mammals, this has significantly increased my chances for survival. I cant say the same about the toilets on the 3rd floor.

I have also started experiencing eye convulsions and minor heart attacks. The mass alienation from the others has not subsided, if anything the pace has greatly picked up.

P.S I don't have cocaine, IV drips or other "itamins", corporate decided to cut budget this year.

Will keep you updated.

Aug 18, 2018

Adderall and bacon.

Aug 18, 2018

I'll take what I can get - sign me up for a crate lmao.

    • 1
Aug 18, 2018

One of my co-workers blacked out at Fogo De Chao a while back and actually pissed his pants at the table. He pretended to spill wine on his pants and excused himself. Nobody ever found out.

    • 1
Aug 18, 2018