I don't get why people say that investment bankers aren't smart

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to work in investment banking. The work is extremely complex, and without a solid grasp of corporate finance and valuation most of the models will go over a typical student's head. There's also my MD's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterization- his personal philosophy draws heavily from John Pierpont Morgan Sr., for instance. The clients understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the synergies created in a merger, to realize that they don't just represent expected cost savings- they represent future GROWTH opportunities as well. As a consequence people who can't break into investment banking truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the characteristics of a prime LBO candidate, which include not only strong cash flow generation but also low debt on its balance sheet. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated non-targets scratching their heads in confusion as my MD's genius wit unfolds itself in the pitch book meeting. What fools.. how I pity them.

And yes, by the way, i DO have a EBITDA tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they can build a discounted cash flow analysis from scratch beforehand. Nothin personnel kid

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  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
Aug 16, 2020 - 11:37pm
JAB123:

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to work in investment banking. The work is extremely complex, and without a solid grasp of corporate finance and valuation most of the models will go over a typical student's head. There's also my MD's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterization- his personal philosophy draws heavily from John Pierpont Morgan Sr., for instance. The clients understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the synergies created in a merger, to realize that they don't just represent expected cost savings- they represent future GROWTH opportunities as well. As a consequence people who can't break into investment banking truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the characteristics of a prime LBO candidate, which include not only strong cash flow generation but also low debt on its balance sheet. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated non-targets scratching their heads in confusion as my MD's genius wit unfolds itself in the pitch book meeting. What fools.. how I pity them.

And yes, by the way, i DO have a EBITDA tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they can build a discounted cash flow analysis from scratch beforehand. Nothin personnel kid

Before some of the people here take it seriously:

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/to-be-fair-you-have-to-have-a-very-high-…

  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Aug 17, 2020 - 2:44am

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