I need advice please, especially from men--sorry to anyone who gets annoyed this isn't finance related

Gold_man_zak's picture
Rank: Baboon | 105

A little background on me: 21, never had a boyfriend (i have never been sure if its practical to have a boyfriend with my mini-life experiences), i have however been in a serious infatuation with someone i met on first day. I am still a little bit in love with the fantasy of having one boyfriend then marriage....feel this mindset of mine may have cost me the guy i was really infatuated with-

i got over him, its been a a year and a 2 months since then ---i am interested in a guy friend (we're not too close--but he's the type that gets along with everyone and also tries to be a good friend to everyone from observation so far, he has many of the qualities i want and need in a guy/

I am not usually the type to be strict on timing of having sex with guys i dont like, but with guys i like i tend to be stricter, because im scared of sex with emotions damaging me...especially since i was so capable of very high infatuation with the other guy (we didnt have sex) and i went crazy--didnt handle my feelings well

Well this new guy, told me he 'maybe likes' a girl and i said who? and he said me, but he doesnt like that im withholding sex, says he would still respect me (we have kissed etc)...and said he didnt disrespect the first time we did stuff together though he barely knew me and doesnt like my idea of first boyfriend to husband and says have i not learnt from my mistake before? he also said i didn't try hard enough to develop attraction with him (frankly i dont know if im good at doing that and also i dont have the energy for it)

but he has been honest and said he wants the constant sex and will help with dealing with dissertation stress and i value honesty so much and he honestly gives me advice in many different areas of life and i'm not attached to him...

my question is ;

am i over valuing the fact that i know him--i might not know who he is that well, for me to be saying i like him

2) i dont know if its cuz of uni and trying to be organized, he's really orderly type of person--he only texts me on weekends

3)he's muslim, i'm christian-dad is pastor --probz unlikely to work out

4) as much as im trying not to be so rigid with ideals---is he possibly manipulating this against me

5) i don't want to have sex with him to keep him--im not sure exactly if that is what im doing or not

6) he's an international student and uni finishes in 8 weeks---he's probably leaving to go back home

7) I'm not sure if taking steps back to sex without relationship is wise for me--i gave myself a reasonable allowance time to do that and i think i have moved on from that

Comments (17)

Mar 10, 2014

You csn't have a relationship without sex.

    • 1
Mar 10, 2014

Observations, feelings, women, simple. God damn .... the world would be a better place if women had even 1% more logic. #ge

    • 1
Mar 11, 2014
karypto:

God damn .... the world would be a better place if women had even 1% more logic.

lol

Mar 10, 2014

I love how your gender changed based on your previous postings.

Mar 10, 2014

haha

Mar 11, 2014
Lou:

I love how your gender changed based on your previous postings.

LOLOLOL

regardless, since op is posing as a woman, will obv get 50+ replies

speed boost blaze

Mar 10, 2014

This post gave me a headache.

Mar 10, 2014

Can't tell if the OP has a real dick or not.

Follow the shit your fellow monkeys say @shitWSOsays

Life is hard, it's even harder when you're stupid - John Wayne

    • 2
Mar 10, 2014

Ask Dr Drew on love line, +1(800)LOVE-191

    • 1
Mar 11, 2014

Is that you Bella Knox?

Mar 11, 2014

you're a loser

Don't listen to anyone, everybody is scared.

Mar 11, 2014

What you think you want and need at age 21 doesn't matter at all. Just protect yourself. The world is big and you have a life to live. Sounds like you're low on self-esteem and high on estrogen, very dangerous combination!

    • 1
Mar 11, 2014

Thanks for being the only one that provided some insight! :)

zAK

Mar 11, 2014

Anyone asking for love advice on WSO = auto troll

Mar 11, 2014

He only texts you on wkends, needs to have sex with you sans relationship to de-stress? And you're considering it? I've been putting in too much effort.

Mar 11, 2014

...you're female ?

Mar 11, 2014
Comment