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God this is depressing to read. Is it really like this everywhere? (ignore my role)

 
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It's on you to know how to manage up. Don't get me wrong, the culture and hours can be brutal. With that said, especially in a virtual environment, it is SO important to push back TACTFULLY on work. I.e. "I am at capacity" is a bad answer. Rather, saying "Thanks XYZ. Happy to work on this, but I am currently working on A, B, and C, with X, Y, and Z, respective deadlines. I can likely get to this at (insert ridiculously late hour i.e. 3/4am). Please let me know if you would like for me to re-prioritize, and to focus on this instead of A, B, and C.

Doing this achieves 1) If an MD needs something tonight, and I can assure you they don't want to review this in the middle of the night, then they will likely just loop someone else in; 2) You are offering to re-prioritize work - you are the "doer" it is NOT your job to assign staffings. If it is TRULY that urgent, the MD/staffer need to work together to figure out priority; 3) You are not pushing back, rather, you are "looping them in" on what you are working on, and letting THEM feel like the ball is in their court vs. you telling them no and having their ego get in the way and them thinking "WTF does this analyst think he's doing pushing back on me".

To be frank, I work at a BB, and maybe my group just has reasonable MDs. With that said, most of my friends who are good at the above and forms of "managing up" have significantly better views on IB than my friends who either 1) say yes to everything and underperform on all tasks, or 2) push back on everything and come off as stand-offish or lazy.

 

Yeah totally agreed. You hit a point where your only options are to continue with an unsustainable lifestyle or build up the energy to jump paths, which feels overwhelming.

Feel like data science or a somewhat semi-statistics role would be cool for you. I have an ex that does that and works for a tech company with awesome pay and WLB.

It's always funny to me how people look at this career as a door opener to a rich life and prestigious, endless options. I took this job with the mindset that it is the only realistic way i can get out of corporate america, and build enough money where i can go work for myself. (albeit way easier said than done).

that being said, could def see myself taking a similar path as you. All my friends work "normal" jobs and are very happy with their life

 

"I took this job with the mindset that it is the only realistic way i can get out of corporate america, and build enough money where i can go work for myself."

Same here, assuming you mean save up enough scratch to dump into a business of your own. The biggest benefit to working in IB, in my opinion, is seeing tens of different business models in different verticals. Even better if you spend some time at a LMM boutique that has a diverse roster of MDs from different spaces since you'll be seeing businesses that are "closer to the ground" and across a variety of industries.

 

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