I'm not a f***king real estate agent

Every time I tell girls I work in Real Estate they automatically assume I am a residential real estate agent. How should I rebrand myself to let girls know I am a highly intelligent commercial real estate professional?

Comments (93)

 
Jun 20, 2020 - 3:43pm

C.R.E. Shervin:

RE developer is ranked as one of the sexiest jobs by women, I read that somewhere. Must be true.

I know a guy who uses the term "RE Developer" when first meeting girls. He fixes and flips homes in crappy neighborhoods, at times for profit (not all the time lol). It worked from 2013-2017, but then he became just another ex-banker turned wannabe investor.

 
Jun 2, 2020 - 2:39pm

MonopolyMoney:

When asked about work I just tell people real estate, and when they ask about housing I respond saying "I believe it's strong but I work with buildings."

Houses are buildings

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Jun 2, 2020 - 7:50pm

My dad literally asked me what the difference was between bank teller and investment banker when I told him about my SA.

 
Most Helpful
  • Analyst 1 in RE - Comm
May 26, 2020 - 8:26pm

Tbh I don't mind when a girl makes this mistake at all. If she fancies herself as too good to go out with / be hit on by a resi broker then chances are I just dodged a bullet in the form of a gold digging b****.

 
  • Associate 2 in Acct - Other
May 27, 2020 - 5:17am

As funny as this thread is, I think it could be a bit of a wake up call to the young adults who have the "Wharton > GS > KKR" mindset. Yes, it's prestigious and a path that few can follow. But in the real world, nobody gives a shit what you do. To them, you're a bank teller (or in OP's case, an estate agent).

If you primary reason for wanting to do a job is the prestige, your motivations are misguided.

 
  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 27, 2020 - 1:40pm

To be fair though PE associates can flex and get laid while bankers are seen as scum.

 
Jun 9, 2020 - 4:18pm

The average girl doesn't know what PE is, probably the average guy for that matter. The interns/students here are 10/10...you guys think that girls follow the same thought process when assessing whether or not they will have sex with a guy as you guys do about prestige on WSO.

Here is a suggestion: don't talk about work, TRY to be interesting, have fun, have a genuine conversation.

 
Jun 4, 2020 - 3:57pm

Associate 2 in Acct - Other:

As funny as this thread is, I think it could be a bit of a wake up call to the young adults who have the "Wharton > GS > KKR" mindset. Yes, it's prestigious and a path that few can follow. But in the real world, nobody gives a shit what you do. To them, you're a bank teller (or in OP's case, an estate agent).

If you primary reason for wanting to do a job is the prestige, your motivations are misguided.

If you want to use your job to get laid / impress randos, you should go be a doctor, join the military, or be an actor (preferably with major Hollywood roles). Those are the only ones I've seen actually impress random chicks. Finance does not impress anyone who isn't connected to it, and lawyers are only a little bit better.

 
May 27, 2020 - 6:23am

I work for a big AM firm. We have an 'Asset Management' department. They manage our laptops, iPhones and shit.

On a different topic, I had a friend who was a PM for about $1B in assets. When he told his family that he was a Portfolio Manager they were like 'what is that?' FML, most of the world doesn't care about us.

I generally see somebody I know on TV on Bloomberg/CNBC etc. once or twice a week. This sounds cool, until I remind myself that I see somebody I know on ESPN five days a week.
 
  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
May 27, 2020 - 10:49am

Are you saying your asset management division just manages your firms laptops, phones, etc. If so what does your friend being a PM have anything to do with that?

 
May 27, 2020 - 1:46pm

Analyst 1 in IB - Gen:

Are you saying your asset management division just manages your firms laptops, phones, etc. If so what does your friend being a PM have anything to do with that?

They were two separate stories. My comment has been edited to clear that up. The first was a joke that the "asset management" department at a quarter trillion dollar asset manager doesn't manage any assets worth talking about. The second was that you can actually be a big-shot in the field and not even have your own family know what you do.

I generally see somebody I know on TV on Bloomberg/CNBC etc. once or twice a week. This sounds cool, until I remind myself that I see somebody I know on ESPN five days a week.
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May 27, 2020 - 6:50am

are you trying to network or get some? who gives a fuck what they think? just say "I'm in commercial real estate" if they say "oh my dad does that too, he's with Remax!" just say "ah ok" and if they go "oh what's that?" then you can explain.

if they're talking to you, they're still interested, lose your ego and refocus the conversation on the prospect, that's how you close.

 
May 27, 2020 - 1:49pm

John Pierpont:

It's called "The Douche"

After three months in quarantine, I think "The Douche" would be a big upgrade for me.

I generally see somebody I know on TV on Bloomberg/CNBC etc. once or twice a week. This sounds cool, until I remind myself that I see somebody I know on ESPN five days a week.
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May 27, 2020 - 10:45am

tho as a rule you should never tell people what you do unless specifically asked...and the first time a girl asks what you do, you should joke and tease her a bit (for like 10 seconds)...but then you should say "i work in structured finance...like when Donald Trump uses a hotel he owns as collateral to buy a golf course, and he needs outside investors to add more money to buy whatever new asset he's trying to buy because he's not as rich as he claims...and the new investors don't trust Trump, because obviously why would you....but they think the golf course will do well....so they do all sorts of complex ownership structure stuff to protect themselves...sometimes that includes actually getting involved in the real estate....all of that stuff gets wrapped into structured finance...and that's what i do"

at this point, you can transition into some funny crazy story about an eccentric billionaire like Trump that makes them seem crazy stupid...and just like other normal people with all our eccentricities...and then trnasition to stories about your friends, family, coworkers etc...to get off the "work topic" (which 99% of girls will not ask about any further).

 
May 27, 2020 - 12:03pm

10/10 would support the up front troll, though. I used to tell girls that I'm a goat farmer in upstate New York. I can assure you this makes a more impressionable first encounter than "I work in private equity." A little humility and a good sense of humor goes a lot further than trying to impress people with pedigree.

"Rage, rage against the dying of the light."
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May 27, 2020 - 1:30pm

Either say you're in commercial real estate or real estate finance. Anything more and you'll sound like a tool unless they ask you for more detail

I’m a fun guy. Obviously I love the game of basketball. I mean there’s more questions you have to ask me in order for me to tell you about myself. I'm not just gonna give you a whole spill... I mean, I don't even know where you're sitting at
 
May 27, 2020 - 2:26pm

If she does that she ain't for you. In that case, help her find a house, but make sure it's either a really shitty deal or in a shitty ass area. Trick her into taking a 30 year mortgage out on it and ditch her. She sucks

 
May 28, 2020 - 1:24am

+1 for pointing that out

“The three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
 
May 28, 2020 - 1:37am

Before you start to say anything, just showing off your visiting card like I do.
And not mention too much your profession in your talking like one time he were asking about sign board and suddenly I said we can make you any signs in Vancouver - real estate signs, courtyard signs, LED signs, sandwich boards, and much more - a quarter cheaper than the market average.

Don't you believe it, do you?

Quality signs - 25% cheaper! http://quartercheapersigns.ca/ We will make you any signs in Vancouver - real estate signs, courtyard signs, LED signs, sandwich boards, and much more - a quarter cheaper than the market average.
 
Jun 2, 2020 - 5:48pm

C'mon. It's funny. Sometimes it's true.

Way too much focus on superficial stuff - look at average income people having $100K weddings. All the build up to the wedding and Seychelles honeymoon...then you gotta live with the person.

So funny - where I live, so many people who were "status friends" are no longer friends once the kids are little bigger - people get real (and 50+% are divorced by then)

 
Jun 1, 2020 - 5:19am

I'd slightly dissagree. Not interested - yes, but you are getting asked the What-do-you-do question by default, don't you? In Germany, for example, what-do-you-do and for-which-company-do-you-work are default questions for getting to know someone, lol.

MM IB/Retail brokerage - Sell-side ER Generalist and Capital Markets IB (ECM, DCM), Eastern Europe and Central Asia region
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  • Analyst 1 in RE - Other
May 30, 2020 - 1:12pm

I can relate to OP
I work in RE PE, and when people ask what I do for a living, I usually put a strong emphasis on the PE part of my work
tbh RE isnt sexy or very exciting at all, the returns are (or at least at my firm)

 
Jun 1, 2020 - 5:15am

Well, in my frontier/emerging market almost no one knows what investment banking and equity research is, so they either assume I am a bank teller, or a forex scammer lol. If it is first, it is still okay, if second, I get attacked for 'being a scammer' lol...

MM IB/Retail brokerage - Sell-side ER Generalist and Capital Markets IB (ECM, DCM), Eastern Europe and Central Asia region
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Jun 2, 2020 - 5:44pm

Call it commercial real estate, or real estate development. Or say I'm in real estate, like [ ] and name your favorite firm.

Whenever I say investment banking, all of a sudden everyone thinks you're a financial advisor and asks for stock picks. #DUH It's annoying.

Unless a young lady is in the biz, you're likely going to have to explain it to her - sell it!

Maybe these broads should be worried about what THEY do for a living, to get YOUR attention, I mean, hello, women need to get themselves a good job. This is not 1952.

 
Jun 8, 2020 - 10:27pm

Confessions from a woman, from real experience:

  1. If I am not in your industry, I don't care unless I genuinely find what you do interesting. This guy once talked nonstop for 20 minutes about how connecting trains worked, and all I remembered was I ran out of wine.
  2. When you brag about how much you make, perhaps entertain the possibility I could make more than you. Some of my past dates didn't think it through.
  3. If I'm in the same industry and we can actually bond over an intellectual conversation? Sign me up. Bonus: If you can FLIRT with me with real estate references? Jackpot.

The ultimate tip to getting laid: figure out what SHE does, what SHE likes, what SHE is passionate about. This isn't about you. It's about getting to know her.

 
Jun 9, 2020 - 4:21pm

QuarterLifeCRE:

This guy once talked nonstop for 20 minutes about how connecting trains worked

Dam sounds kinda interesting tho

"My name's Ralph Cox, and I'm from where ever's not gonna get me hit"
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