Improve my resume please?

Hey guys this is my second revision of an earlier resume I had.

http://www.razume.com/documents/21259

My old resume: //www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/destroy-this-resum…

Was wondering if you guys had any more advice or thoughts as to how I can better prepare this resume to (hopefully) land me an i-banking internship this upcoming year.

Same information as before but I'll post again:

"A little bit of background information:

The PWM internship listed was done in my hometown... small and very unknown boutique consulting firm.

I am from a target.

I am seeking an internship this upcoming Sophomore year."

Thanks a lot guys and I appreciate all the help!

-AZ

 
Best Response

Not a single one of your bullet points under your work experience mentions a tangible result of your work. Yeah its great you did a bunch of shit, but did you really accomplish anything? This is my most important critique, the rest below are all just random things that I don't like. Also, the furthest your experience goes back is 2 months ago. Surely you had a job or did something in high school or something else you can speak to?

Abbreviate your states. Arizona --> AZ, et al

As for all your honors down at the bottom, that's really great you got them and all, but I haven't a fucking clue what any of that means. I'm sure that Death Valley Music Level 10 and an Intel scholarship took some hard work and all but unless I too am Level 10 or got that scholarship, I have cannot relate and therefore do not care.

Your relevant coursework seems to be every single finance class you took during your freshman year. Slim it down to one line because right now its just a laundry list.

 

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