Incoming Foot Rub Factory Analyst

I'm very proud that after several months of prodding my great aunt Jesse, I will be finally be aloud to meet my heart's desire and become an incoming analyst at the Foot Rub Factory (tm) of Lexington, Kentucky on the corner of Trump & Lincoln Boulevard (bless his soul - I'm referring to the former) & Walrus Way. My internship for the past 7 months has been an incredibly humbling experience, especially as I wasn't allowed to enter the building to do my job of analizing by my extended family for the first 13 weeks of my stint at this prestigious Bunion Bracket. I had the extraordinary experience of analyzing how to:

  1. Rub them feet
  2. Clean them footsies
  3. Massage 'em (there are sophisticated disparities in the processing of this type of business activity and rubbing)
  4. Put together powerpoint presentations for 100 hours a week
  5. Understand why Jesse isn't divorced but also doesn't talk to Bob anymore

I truly didn't know the nature of what people meant by labor market frictions until I started rubbing feet for a livin'. This experience has taught me that I'm better than those good for nothing losers who work at the Manicure Middles; the feet are the foundation of the person and for that reason I'm going to say for the second time during this post that I have an accepted an offer to work at FRF LLC in 36-48 months over my great aunt Jesse's dead body (that's how she phrased it).

 

Linkedin is the most useful space for me to me to grow my brand. I love to talk about my dogs; I was told that people in the industry love dogs. I hope that I'll be able to get a job talking about my pooches.

 

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