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IB keeps its’ rep because no one will admit they slaved away their undergrad earning perfect grades to simply slave away at a IB as a glorified assistant. So they make it sound ‘baller with how much money they make and how they are closing deals and what not. In reality, they are powerpoint b!tchboys (aka the deck) who make pretty presentations to the sellers of businesses. Modeling is part of the job, but not a huge part. Despite what you learn in the CFA, valuation does not equal price. Some of you were bashing me for my comp valuation I was attempting awhile ago and how I should use free cash flows. Look, we’re looking to buy a company at the lowest price possible and justify it by comps in the market, not do a DCF valuation and pay what the company is hypothetically worth 10 years from now.

IB is like spring break. Any of you ever go? Every year tons and tons of horny frat boys go South to places like Cancun, South Padre, Miami, etc. to party and hook up each night with ease like MTV makes it out to be. I’m here to tell you that it’s all a ruse. When I went on spring break, it was easily 10-15 guys per girl, and most girls kept close to their crew since they know what our agenda is. It was a far truth from what the REAL WORLD MTV made it out to be. But, no guy is going to admit they blew $2k on a spring break that was shittier than the run of the mill weekend in their college town; so they lie and say it was crazier than a GGW gang bang.

There you have it folks. The cat is out of the bag.

 
ChimpinOut:

IB keeps its' rep because no one will admit they slaved away their undergrad earning perfect grades to simply slave away at a IB as a glorified assistant. So they make it sound 'baller with how much money they make and how they are closing deals and what not. In reality, they are powerpoint b!tchboys (aka the deck) who make pretty presentations to the sellers of businesses. Modeling is part of the job, but not a huge part. Despite what you learn in the CFA, valuation does not equal price. Some of you were bashing me for my comp valuation I was attempting awhile ago and how I should use free cash flows. Look, we're looking to buy a company at the lowest price possible and justify it by comps in the market, not do a DCF valuation and pay what the company is hypothetically worth 10 years from now.

IB is like spring break. Any of you ever go? Every year tons and tons of horny frat boys go South to places like Cancun, South Padre, Miami, etc. to party and hook up each night with ease like MTV makes it out to be. I'm here to tell you that it's all a ruse. When I went on spring break, it was easily 10-15 guys per girl, and most girls kept close to their crew since they know what our agenda is. It was a far truth from what the REAL WORLD MTV made it out to be. But, no guy is going to admit they blew $2k on a spring break that was shittier than the run of the mill weekend in their college town; so they lie and say it was crazier than a GGW gang bang.

There you have it folks. The cat is out of the bag.

Spot on for your IB part of the post, but on spring break, really? Where did you go on spring break? You gotta have a crew of girls from your school that roll with you and then the randoms come in.

Maybe I am too old. It was easy back in the day (late 90's).

 
ChimpinOut:

IB keeps its' rep because no one will admit they slaved away their undergrad earning perfect grades to simply slave away at a IB as a glorified assistant. So they make it sound 'baller with how much money they make and how they are closing deals and what not. In reality, they are powerpoint b!tchboys (aka the deck) who make pretty presentations to the sellers of businesses. Modeling is part of the job, but not a huge part. Despite what you learn in the CFA, valuation does not equal price. Some of you were bashing me for my comp valuation I was attempting awhile ago and how I should use free cash flows. Look, we're looking to buy a company at the lowest price possible and justify it by comps in the market, not do a DCF valuation and pay what the company is hypothetically worth 10 years from now.

IB is like spring break. Any of you ever go? Every year tons and tons of horny frat boys go South to places like Cancun, South Padre, Miami, etc. to party and hook up each night with ease like MTV makes it out to be. I'm here to tell you that it's all a ruse. When I went on spring break, it was easily 10-15 guys per girl, and most girls kept close to their crew since they know what our agenda is. It was a far truth from what the REAL WORLD MTV made it out to be. But, no guy is going to admit they blew $2k on a spring break that was shittier than the run of the mill weekend in their college town; so they lie and say it was crazier than a GGW gang bang.

There you have it folks. The cat is out of the bag.

This is hilarious and accurate. At the end of the day in theory what an IB analyst supports might be cool, but in practice you're truthfully just someone's bitch.

 

This is pure gold.

Would you do the IB stint again though? What would you say to me when I am considering an internship (but never full time) at IB. Worth it for the CV if my goals lie elsewhere?

 
gsmsml:
I am going down the drastic decision of thinking whether to do i-banking or go to the buy side coming out of college..... just do not know if the hours and no life are worth it. And also just do not know what bucket I will come in working with all the other i-bankers. I fully understand that for your career it is the best thing you can do, but is this the reason why I should do it? I just do not know how well I will do and if I will come out in the top bucket. I also do not know if I even want to do private equity and I do not want to get my MBA as I know i want to spend my career on wall street. what do i do?

go work in the back office.

 
gsmsml:
I am going down the drastic decision of thinking whether to do i-banking or go to the buy side coming out of college..... just do not know if the hours and no life are worth it. And also just do not know what bucket I will come in working with all the other i-bankers. I fully understand that for your career it is the best thing you can do, but is this the reason why I should do it? I just do not know how well I will do and if I will come out in the top bucket. I also do not know if I even want to do private equity and I do not want to get my MBA as I know i want to spend my career on wall street. what do i do?

I really don't know what you want people to tell you. Judging by your other posts, you have a summer internship with a BB. You are worrying about this way too early. You say you don't know how you will perform at an I-Bank. That's because you haven't started your internship. Your internship will tell you whether banking is for you or not. Ask this question again in 4 months. For now, take a xanax and relax.

 

gqbanker15 just nailed the discussion right there... for sure this is an internship ("You say you don't know how you will perform at an I-Bank. That's because you haven't started your internship.")... same situation 12 months ago, tried it (interned at lraazd) didn't like the work, now im starting with M/B/B. btw, i still consider i haven't killed my chances, at all, of going into pe/vc later on (although i might have slightly decreased my chances for pe...)

 

you're writing about this question at your 337th post !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (right now im not lucid enough to explain all the implications i found about you, but im sure ppl in this forum are smart enough to find at least a few...)

 
gsmsml:
I am going down the drastic decision of thinking whether to do i-banking or go to the buy side coming out of college..... just do not know if the hours and no life are worth it. And also just do not know what bucket I will come in working with all the other i-bankers. I fully understand that for your career it is the best thing you can do, but is this the reason why I should do it? I just do not know how well I will do and if I will come out in the top bucket. I also do not know if I even want to do private equity and I do not want to get my MBA as I know i want to spend my career on wall street. what do i do?

Are you serious man? It is not a life or death situation, just do the internship and evaluate what you think you might like / dislike in i-banking and choose from there. Wall Street is Wall Street, everyone finds their own niche in these investment banks, whether it be investment banking or not. I mean come on, think about all these fucks on this board who are still trying to figure out what is i-banking, freaken relax and enjoy the internship.

 

Also, not to sound cocky or mean, but i-banking is not the industry for those with insecurity and self-doubt. Those who are confident and hard-working will succeed. So if you're posting "I don't know if I will come out in top bucket", that should probably tell you if banking is not for you. For those who are saying "I will work my hardest to make sure I come out in top bucket", welcome to investment banking.

 
gqbanker15:
Also, not to sound cocky or mean, but i-banking is not the industry for those with insecurity and self-doubt. Those who are confident and hard-working will succeed. So if you're posting "I don't know if I will come out in top bucket", that should probably tell you if banking is not for you. For those who are saying "I will work my hardest to make sure I come out in top bucket", welcome to investment banking.

Indeed although no one really knows if i-banking is exactly what they do, most i-bankers know that whatever they do they are going to be the best and you have to have that attitude do succeed as an i-banker

 

The problem with life is that you can't plan everything out in your head like that. Just do the banking for a few years, it's not a life sentence if you don't want it to be. You will have more or less the best work experience you can have on your resume if you worked for a BB. Talk to people who are 40+, you can be guaranteed most of them will tell you they just somehow eventually fell into the job they like in their late 20s or something.

 

Sorry, too new to this. What is S&T, and who is Mitch and Murray?

Also, by reading some of the posts, it seems like it is too late for recruiting, and while we are in the same division for sports as amhert and williams, I don't see any IBs coming to Colby. What is the best way to contact them?

 
maineman:
I am good at sales, is IB for me?

No. Sales is for you.

  • Though it's quite difficult to get into. Given your background, wealth management may be easier.
http://ayainsight.co/ Curating the best advice and making it actionable.
 

I don't know man, being lazy doesn't get you anywhere (usually). However if you want a really pleasant experience and make a nice living, maybe you should check out Sales or something along those lines. As far as I know they spent a lot of time with clients (so a lot of social events etc.). No expert on Sales though

I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars, buddy. A player. Or nothing. See my Blog & AMA
 

I understand IB isn't for everyone but to me it looks like you're looking for the easy way out and just being lazy.

Dude, if you can find a job with $65k starting salary out of school, working 40-50 hours a week with lots of vacation, let me know so I can have the job. Seriously, those jobs don't exist.

Not trying to rip you a new one because you're just a freshman and your thinking will change a lot in the next two years (currently undergoing SA recruiting and I still think about if IB is right for me) but your post screams spoiled, lazy, and mediocre. I'm not saying you need to be a gunner and start showing up to your intro accounting classes with a slickback, but at least have some self-respect.

MM IB -> Corporate Development -> Strategic Finance
 
SECfinance:
I understand IB isn't for everyone but to me it looks like you're looking for the easy way out and just being lazy.

Dude, if you can find a job with $65k starting salary out of school, working 40-50 hours a week with lots of vacation, let me know so I can have the job. Seriously, those jobs don't exist.

Not trying to rip you a new one because you're just a freshman and your thinking will change a lot in the next two years (currently undergoing SA recruiting and I still think about if IB is right for me) but your post screams spoiled, lazy, and mediocre. I'm not saying you need to be a gunner and start showing up to your intro accounting classes with a slickback, but at least have some self-respect.

don't entry jobs in consulting fit (even exceed) the criteria outlined in my original post? not sure how reliable it is but: http://managementconsulted.com/consulting-jobs/2011-management-consulti…

 

Sure, minus the part where you travel five days a week, live in Holiday Inn Expresses, and work 65-80 hours/week.

(And get paid less.)

The firms listed in your link are also the equivalent of GS and MS in consulting. If you have the mindset you currently do, you won't get a first round interview at any of these places.

MM IB -> Corporate Development -> Strategic Finance
 
SECfinance:
Sure, minus the part where you travel five days a week, live in Holiday Inn Expresses, and work 65-80 hours/week.

(And get paid less.)

The firms listed in your link are also the equivalent of GS and MS in consulting. If you have the mindset you currently do, you won't get a first round interview at any of these places.

oh

Sexy_Like_Enrique:
F500 corp finance, accounting at smaller firms (non- Big4 accountants have very good work/life balance), and maybe sales at BB are worth the look for you.

bottom line: if you are lazy and don't want to put in many hours, you will be miserable as fuck working in banking and you prob won't last more than a year into your job.

That being said, also try to look into a career in dentistry. It is exactly what you are looking for: 40-45 hour weeks, high pay (150k+), stable, and relatively stress free.

Or, look into tech sector. major in CS and get a programming job. i have a buddy who got CS degree working at a top tech firm (think facebook, youtube, or google), and his starting salary was 140k + 50k sign bonus + 80 stock option bonus at the end of year, and he only works 45-50 hours a week.

F500 Corp Finance and Sales at BB seem like good options...I don't really want to be continuously crunching numbers of looking into people's mouths for the rest of my life but $150k for 40-45 hours a week sounds great...CS is an option...guess it depends on how achievable your buddy's starting salary is...I'll look into that.

as far as consulting, I don't mind the travel at all and I've heard that average hours are 60 hours a week...which is just about OK for me. And just to reiterate...I'm not lazy in the sense that I don't do work...I always make sure to complete work on time + to a high standard...I just don't enjoy working for extended periods. So it's not about whether I'd "survive" in a certain field (I pretty certain I CAN put in 80 hour weeks...although obviously I can't know 100% until I try it)...it's whether I'd be happy with such a bad work/life balance.

I'm a hard worker, I'd just really dislike 80 hour work weeks.

 

F500 corp finance, accounting at smaller firms (non- Big4 accountants have very good work/life balance), and maybe sales at BB are worth the look for you.

bottom line: if you are lazy and don't want to put in many hours, you will be miserable as fuck working in banking and you prob won't last more than a year into your job.

That being said, also try to look into a career in dentistry. It is exactly what you are looking for: 40-45 hour weeks, high pay (150k+), stable, and relatively stress free.

Or, look into tech sector. major in CS and get a programming job. i have a buddy who got CS degree working at a top tech firm (think facebook, youtube, or google), and his starting salary was 140k + 50k sign bonus + 80 stock option bonus at the end of year, and he only works 45-50 hours a week.

 

Hey freshman, nxt time you want to say you are a lazy shithead, dont say you are at USC...makes kids like me that had to BLEED our eyes out for internships sound pathetic when ppl like you post about USC Marshall students being lazy (and to be honest dont count on even being recruited well, i have friends with 3.8+ GPAs that got 3-5 superdays and 0 offers at BBs...BBs in LA are downsizing, so if you want to even be considered for a position or banking you wont make it with the lazy attitude).

Pick up some books, network with bankers, talk to alumnus, cold call/speak to ppl in the industry or get a boutique banking internship nxt summer....only then will you know if you like banking or want to do it.

No one here can tell you what to do, and if you listen to someone that tells you what to do with your future, then you dont deserve one. Sorry but their are kids at NON TARGETS that work 9839896879098895X the amount you seem to want to put in and will have a harder time getting jobs because they dont have your Trojan network.

Take advantge of the USC name in southern cal and learn from talking/experience. thanks.

 
USCstudent26:
Hey freshman, nxt time you want to say you are a lazy shithead, dont say you are at USC...makes kids like me that had to BLEED our eyes out for internships sound pathetic when ppl like you post about USC Marshall students being lazy (and to be honest dont count on even being recruited well, i have friends with 3.8+ GPAs that got 3-5 superdays and 0 offers at BBs...BBs in LA are downsizing, so if you want to even be considered for a position or banking you wont make it with the lazy attitude).

Pick up some books, network with bankers, talk to alumnus, cold call/speak to ppl in the industry or get a boutique banking internship nxt summer....only then will you know if you like banking or want to do it.

No one here can tell you what to do, and if you listen to someone that tells you what to do with your future, then you dont deserve one. Sorry but their are kids at NON TARGETS that work 9839896879098895X the amount you seem to want to put in and will have a harder time getting jobs because they dont have your Trojan network.

Take advantge of the USC name in southern cal and learn from talking/experience. thanks.

Agreed. Also, given that USC is not a target for bank in NY, you'd be hard pressed to even get an internship, let alone think you can get IB or S&T full-time.

 

As a PAC 12 guy myself, I really love threads that confirm my ridiculous biases pertaining to U$C students, so for that, I'd just like to say thank you to the OP.

To be fair, though, it's a good question, and everybody on this board trying so desperately to get into banking should probably ask themselves if, indeed, The Floundering Ship of Banking is a good one to sink with. In my case, the answer was no: IB wasn't for me. I had a Summer Analyst gig at a BB over the summer, and just plain didn't like it: I missed my family, I missed my friends, and it would have been okay had the work been anything other than shitting on an Excel spreadsheet, but alas, it wasn't.

I'm weak.

So, I ended up recruiting for trading and asset management, and now I'll be entering one of those fields post-graduation.

As for suggestions, I really think Accounting or a Corp. Finance Rotational might be for you. It doesn't fit your entry-level salary criteria, but then again, very few non-engineering fields aside from banking do -- perhaps buy side research? But those jobs are highly, highly competitive out of undergrad, and probably involve about 60 hours, not 40-50. The people suggesting coding are right (in that it fits your criteria), but unless you eat, sleep, breathe, and masturbate to coding, you'll be hard-pressed to get a job at a Google/Facebook/Amazon/Elite Startup-type, which are really where the money is when it comes to programming. Being a middling programmer at a middling firm is a great way to make about $60,000...

...For the rest of your life*. Unless, of course, you manage to jump to the business side of tech.

Anyway, good luck to you. College is a long road, and things will happen that probably force you to completely reevaluate what it is you actually want out of your life and your career, so let those things happen, and then get back to us once you decide.

*Obviously, I'm exaggerating somewhat, but technical jobs don't necessarily provide you with the long-term growth you might be looking for (even for that $250,000+ number).

 

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