MD never sleeps (growing suspicious)Subscribe
So I've had this hunch for a while and wanted to get others thoughts. Before you think I'm crazy and sleep deprived just look at the evidence I am about to bestow upon you all.
Over the past year I've been growing suspicious that my MD is a vampire... There are several reasons that have begun to bring me to this conclusion, which I have included, below:
(i) I have never seen him sleep and his email correspondence does not leave gaps in which one could conclude that he sleeps (e.g. emails all day with no major gaps in correspondence
(ii) I've noticed a direct correlation that the more well rested the junior bankers are the more his skin has a slightly grey-ish tone to it (e.g. could he be sustaining his immortality on our suffering? Just proposing the question here...)
(iii) I have never seen him walk past a mirror nor do we have any in the office, which seems odd no?
(iv) He was a major banker (think head of IB at elite boutique) and had over 30 yrs of experience and MBA but looks as if he is late 30s. Yet no look of any cosmetic procedures having been completed. Couple with the fact that there are never doctor appointments this portends to an almost ageless effect of the stressful nature of the job which seems dubious at best.
(v) He will consistently wear sunglasses outside even if it is not sunny. Anecdotally, he seems to heavily prefer the indoors.
Now I have no evidence for this, but I believe he could have a blood boy...
In light of these finds, I have bought garlic pills to begin taking, but I'm not sure if I should also keep some in my desk to avoid Friday evening fire drills...
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