MD wanted me to drink

So I'm a college student who is involved with the alumni recruiting efforts at my school. I drink a lot in college, and it's become a problem. I'm trying to drink less or not at all when I can. I don't really want to talk about it, but it's a bad idea for me to drink. 

This weekend, I was having dinner with my school team and a BB dept head who kinda gave me shit for not drinking. I straight up said that I used to go hard but that I'm trying to ease off. He gave me a weird look. 
 

Will this hurt me in the future? I mean trying not to drink? I hate talking about this but it's a real problem for me. 

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Comments (28)

  • Intern in IB - Cov
Oct 7, 2021 - 7:54pm

I can drink in moderation sometimes, but unless you've actually been addicted to it, it's hard to explain. Normally when I drink, I can't help but go to oblivion. I know I sound like a dumb ass, but it's really hard to explain unless you've actually been addicted before. 

Oct 12, 2021 - 1:13pm

You're talking about two different things. You can drink into oblivion without being addicted to it. 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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Oct 7, 2021 - 8:37pm

Contrary to popular culture, people find it weird when college students talk like 50-year old alcoholics. It means something's wrong with you.

And I say this as someone who has serious problems with drinking. Honestly work-from-home has probably cut my drinking by 90% and I like it.

"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn

Oct 7, 2021 - 8:52pm

Bullshit to them. Say you're on an antibiotic you can't mix alcohol with. Easy go to if they ask follow up question, had a hangnail that got infected or something similar.

Side note, would never tell someone higher on the totem pole than yourself that you "used to go hard" while you're still in school. That sounds ridiculous. If you're gonna take that route, just shoot straight and tell them you've struggled with alcohol in the past and at this point in your life prefer not to drink. Been where you're at before, wish you luck. If you need anything, always here. 

  • Intern in IB - Cov
Oct 7, 2021 - 9:07pm

Thanks man. You have a good point. He told me how he sunk a school boat drunk once in college so I thought he was chill. 

Most Helpful
Oct 12, 2021 - 1:17pm

I wouldn't open up explaining that you've struggled with alcohol in the past to simply prevent someone from pushing you to drink. Though some may relate / appreciate the honesty there is certainly a contingent of people in the U.S. that will immediately look down upon you for admitting you have potential addiction / alcoholism issues (consistent with how addiction is criminalized / negatively perceived in U.S.). It's also personal information that could be a bit premature to share at basic networking events -- just say you prefer not to drink during the week / weekend when you have a lot going on (if they find issue with that that's on them as most adults can relate, as I've noted below -- any mature adult will usually drop it, as you start working you'll find some closer coworkers may jest with you in good fun but general coworkers typically don't aggressively push in the U.S. -- different story for APAC working cultures with your boss). I find it rude when people push further to involve themselves as to what your reason may be.

It frankly just sounds like this MD is an odd / immature individual and this was an outlier event. Telling a bunch of college students he wrecked a boat while driving under the influence / giving a college a weird look for saying I don't want to drink? I've yet to have been at a networking event / firm function where not drinking has caused someone else to negatively perceive me -- order a seltzer with ice and people will just assume it's a gin & tonic or vodka soda as it helps blend in (vs. not having anything in your hand).

Oct 12, 2021 - 1:14pm

No don't lie about it. 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
Oct 7, 2021 - 10:56pm

I always use the phrase "alcoholism runs in the family" when I don't feel like drinking. Most people don't push back. If someone keeps trying to pressure me they're an asshole and I know to avoid them.

  • Associate 1 in CorpFin
Oct 8, 2021 - 12:17am

You're an adult. You don't owe anyone an explanation. Just say I'm good and if they continue say I don't drink. Its pretty standard as a professional to not dive into people's personal shit if they don't offer to share. If they try to, you probably don't want to work with them.

  • Prospect in IB-M&A
Oct 8, 2021 - 1:13am

Yeah lmao good luck getting a job going around with that attitude. Fact of the matter is to get most things in this world, you gotta suck up

Oct 12, 2021 - 11:56am

Anonymous Monkey

So I'm a college student who is involved with the alumni recruiting efforts at my school. I drink a lot in college, and it's become a problem. I'm trying to drink less or not at all when I can. I don't really want to talk about it, but it's a bad idea for me to drink. 

This weekend, I was having dinner with my school team and a BB dept head who kinda gave me shit for not drinking. I straight up said that I used to go hard but that I'm trying to ease off. He gave me a weird look. 

Will this hurt me in the future? I mean trying not to drink? I hate talking about this but it's a real problem for me. 

This was very common when I lived in England, less in the states. I still do not drink and do do not plan to start. I just change jobs because I am not going to put with peer pressure.

SafariJoe, wins again!
Oct 12, 2021 - 1:35pm

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D.O.U.G.

Oct 12, 2021 - 2:28pm

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