Most disappointed you've ever been in a "friend"?
I'm currently a member of one of those student-run "investment groups" that takes endowment money and loses it in the financial markets all in the name of education. A few weeks ago when we opened up our application, my former roommate reached out to me and asked me if I was in the said group- a silly question given that a cursory glance at my LinkedIn would confirm my membership.
I responded to a few of his texts but tried to make it clear I wasn't interested in a conversation. I hadn't talked to him in a while because he flaked on our plans multiple times in the past and made it clear to me that he didn't value our friendship.
At first, it made me really angry because I felt like he was somehow trying to get me to help him in the application process with any remaining goodwill he had left (which is pretty much zero at this point). He's a poor writer with a subpar GPA (
Very glad none of you is in my circle.
I get a lot of people for some weird reason asking me for referrals to positions like Senior VP in Private Equity or TMT IB at my Bank and they currently have some BS Life Insurance sales or similar kind of role. Here I am hoping I can even just shine the shoes of the guy/gal who is making decisions on who to hire for those job openings. I then tell them that we have some pretty decent openings for MO in Chicago/Houston/Dallas/SLC/Baltimore and they are like 'no thanks'
here's what I'd do - show him the blueprint but don't open the door for him. this is a "prove it" moment. you are totally fine showing him how the application process works but say "I can't really show any favoritism..." maybe give him some examples of past things successful people in the fund have done to get accepted, and if he does those things, remember that. it means he's changed. if he's willing to put in the work to do something, that's a different person. if, however, he remains a mooch, you'll be glad you didn't stick your neck out for him. I believer everyone deserves second chances. if I was judged today based upon the person I was at 20 years old, I would have no clients. not saying I was morally bankrupt, I was just a shit kid who hadn't matured yet. I've had what you're describing happen to me, and when the person came back for more after not following through on the last thing, I just said I can't help, that usually keeps them away.
You and your friend are both bitches
yeah you suck, purely based on the way you wrote this post
This does not not sound like a good situation but you might want to consider changing the title for this topic, as it is a little overly dramatic for the issue. I was expected to see something like the friend cheated on you or stole a job from you, etc. The title is click bait.
Friends who borrow money and disappear - shocking cause you never suspected they have underlying issues
I wouldn't go ahead an blast this guy for his GPA and "middling" resume as it makes you seem like a prick, but a lot of people choose to network the way you described and it definitely isn't correct. His correct course of action would have been to consider you a resource, if not a friend, but kept up appearances and stayed in touch connecting over small things and checking in on how you're doing. Guessing him not doing that is why you feel slighted.
This is a good lesson in general "how not to network" which all of us can learn from. It's important to make sure that we keep in close contact with those we know could be a professional resource down the road.
Easily when one of my best friends slept with an ex of mine, which we dated for 1.5 years, and were broken up for a little over a year when they slept together. I was already moved on and dating someone else for a few months at that point so I wasn't crazy mad about it. The most disappointing factor was that he did not tell me, I had to ask myself. I actually had no idea but knew they were around a lot that Summer and knowing my friend (man slut) and my ex (slut too), I figured it was only a matter of time. He admitted it and said it was drunk sex and sucked and all that stuff. Honestly, I've been friends with the guy since elementary school, and it wasn't worth ending a friendship over. I know who he is and was not really surprised since he just likes sleeping with a ton of girls so I decided to let it go. I also lost my virginity and took his first ex's virginity when we were in the 9th grade so I guess that made us even.
Hmmm let's see here....oh:
Besides that guy, I realized sometime in college that most of my highschool friends had no ambitions that were compatible with mine, with their most passionate hobbies being video games or gym ratting. No one ever wanted to do anything, explore, start a business, etc. I still have a couple high school friends who I keep in contact with but the main group I hung out with has been out of my life for 5+ years now.
Really did myself wrong by letting myself get surrounded by people who were not the best influence, still a major regret I have now that I am mid-20s and see others who grew up with positive friend groups who all helped each other grow. That's something I will never have and I will always be a guy who has more disconnected friend network.
you need to get laid more often
It should at least be 3x a day. My parents should have named me Chad.
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