My Official 2020 Presidential Endorsement

Lloyd BIankfein's picture
Rank: Human | 13,805

I am endorsing SENATOR BERNIE SANDERS for President in 2020. Donald Trump is 73 years old, way too old to be president. Sanders will bring his youth and charisma and help turn this country around.

College should be free. Healthcare should be free. Internet should be free. Condoms should be free (the fact that you exist proves this).

We need a modern day Glass Seagull. Seagulls are disgusting and poop everywhere, just like Deutsche Bank employees. One time, when I was at the beach, a seagull stole my submarine sandwich. You can't steal my sandwich if you're made of glass can you now you dumb seagull bitch!

I think for too long, we've allowed the private equity industries to rape middle America for profit and scrap companies for parts. KKR? More like the KKK. When TOYS R US went bankrupt, Henry Kravis and Mitt Romney personally took turns sodomizing Toys R US mascot Geoffrey the Giraffe. #MeToo anyone?

We need single-payer healthcare. Who's going to pay for it? Joe!

For all of these reasons, and because Jeffrey Epstein did commit suicide, I am endorsing BERNIE SANDERS to become the 46th President of the United States

Comments (22)

Dec 7, 2019

who's Joe?

    • 1
Funniest
Dec 7, 2019

JOE MAMA!

    • 37
Dec 7, 2019

ha! walked right into that one =)
Good one Lloyd.

Dec 7, 2019

It took a couple seconds to figure out who posted this after seeing the title lmao

Array

Dec 7, 2019

BERNIE FLANDERS 2020

Dec 7, 2019

I love all creatures like gophers and deerts, and those things that fly and everything else, but fuck seagulls. I got no time for those cocksuckers.

Dec 7, 2019

Can't go to jail for stealing change boys

Gun rights activist
Dec 7, 2019

can't go to jail for insider trading either uwu

Most Helpful
Dec 7, 2019

Most donations to Bernie Sanders (which happen to be like $8-$20 dollars), happen to be half of the donors entire net worth

    • 4
Dec 7, 2019

to be fair, if you have -$37, and you need $5000 for healthcare, and if you make $20 per handjob underneath the Queensboro bridge, donating the money to Bernie Sanders and getting "FREE" healthcare is a good ROI

    • 8
Dec 7, 2019

I endorse Corey booker. Anyone who has been inside of Rosario Dawson is good enough for me.

Array

Dec 7, 2019

Cory Booker is a closeted homosexual who has never been inside of rosario dawson

    • 2
Dec 8, 2019

lol I met him once before at a restaurant I worked at and he did give me that vibe

Dec 10, 2019
Lloyd BIankfein:

Cory Booker is a closeted homosexual who has never been inside of rosario dawson

"The FBI and our intelligence agencies are highly competent, professional, and non-partisan."

The same naive bro: "Cory Booker is straight."

    • 1
Dec 8, 2019

I endorse Senator Donald Trump. He's been a shining star in a sky filled with falling stars.

What concert costs 45 cents? 50 Cent feat. Nickelback.

    • 1
Dec 10, 2019

Healthcare should almost definitely be free. What America does to the poor who don't have insurance from a healthcare perspective is a disgrace tbh. College is debatable, but the cost structure certainly needs evaluation from the top-down.

    • 1
Dec 10, 2019

Who is going to pay for healthcare? My trust fund? No thanks.

What concert costs 45 cents? 50 Cent feat. Nickelback.

Dec 10, 2019
Jamie_Diamond:

Who is going to pay for healthcare? My trust fund? No thanks.

Lol

Dec 13, 2019
Comment

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