Pretend to be gay to go to JPMorgan event?
So my school which is located in NYC recently sent out an invitation to a program from JPMorgan for sophomores and juniors to apply for.If accepted they would be invited down to the headquarters, shadow employees, network, and attend skill building sessions. It sounds like a great program however the only people allowed to apply are either Hispanic, Black, and Native Americans. The there's another opportunity to apply if you are LGBT, and then another chance to apply if you're a woman. As a white male who likes girls I feel a little slighted here.
Should I pretend to be gay and apply?
I think this question is a very important question: should you pretend to be homosexual and apply? I frankly believe that you are in doubt and your insecurities are clouding up the truth about your sexuality. I hope this helps. Good luck.
no. Don't do this.
Don't do it. If the truth comes out, it may be rather embarrassing and won't settle well with the people from JPM.
Why don't you get a sex change operation while you're at it. Instead of attending only two events you'll be able to attend all three as a lesbian. The brightside is that nobody will question your love for women.
Not sure if troll...
do it
Why don't you claim 5% black? Go to that one.
Claim bi-sexual? Go to that one.
Claim tranny? Go to that one.
3 shots to succeed? Profit.
do it
Probably a troll but in any case you should definitely go there as a member of the LGBT community. To practice, you can head out to a gay bar in the West Village the night before to get yourself acclimated with your new open-mindedness. You may think you like girls now but chance is after some experimentations you may discover that you like guys even more (or at least as much).
I've seen multiple posts from you now that suggest to me you might actually be Brandon St. Randy.
Go the Native American route. I am legally "Native American" because of a tribal vote to extend "membership" if your parents are registered with the tribe. I am about 8% Native but qualify for all the Native grants, benefits, etc.
I have friends in some of my scholarship programs who look white as shit, but also still qualify. A little safer route than black or gay. It's unlikely they would try and trace it back and ask for your tribal ID or #.
I just found out the same thing while visiting an uncle who lives a few states away. I'd actually like to volunteer or something on a reservation at some point, some of them are really fucked up.
Pretending to be LGBT to get 1st round interviews (Originally Posted: 08/19/2013)
Of course whether you actually land the offer will depend on your own merits but isn't this an awesome way to secure 1st round interviews?
^Very fucked up, and overall the most fucked over race/people by the US. It's def on my agenda at some point to give back a bunch. And your "Native Americanness" is also referred to blood quantum, usually out of /32, so you want to say "my blood quantum is low, like 3/32." If you need any other info to pass as being Native - if you go that route - PM me. haha this thread is borderline ridiculous
"Pretending" huh? Riiiight
Not like you would be able to tell whether I was really straight / gay / bisexual anyway.
I've missed WSO.
I count many of my best friends in finance amongst the ranks of the LGBT community, and from what I understand, your strategy has been unsuccessfully deployed more often than not.
From what I understand, these diversity events are often used to sift the opportunistic chaff from the genuinely gay wheat. The recruiters and interviewing staff populating these events to mingle with aspiring applicants can finesse the authenticity of an attendee’s orientation, which are often betrayed in those fraudulent by subtle tells that are discernible only by experienced intuition. Unless you’ve rehearsed your speech, gesticulations, and mannerisms to the fitting standards inquired through their typical line of questioning (which I refuse to disclose on grounds that those genuinely belonging to the LGBT community can effortlessly and frictionlessly answer satisfactorily on the spot), it will be exceedingly difficult to clear the banks’ gaydars.
Moreover, exploiting the financial service sector’s genuine effort of goodwill in welcoming and accepting a historically-excluded, violently-opposed American minority is morally-reprehensible. Concentrate on "becoming the best you [that] you can be” so that you can confidently abandon these Sketchy Schemes.
You're speaking as if being gay is some sort of ancient martial art that takes 20 years to master. I bet I'd be able to act gayer than Justin Bieber if I was properly incentivized.
I've come across several gay people in my life and to be honest, I had never noticed and most likely would have never found out if they hadn't told me.
Genuine Goodwill - give me a break. It's a bunch of pandering nonsense, quite frankly if I was LGBTQ I'd be offended by the bank's pandering.
OP - I get where you're coming from, it's ridiculous that people with a certain sexual orientation are put on a pedestal. After all, it's not a choice, nobody aside from backwoods hicks cares about it, there's nothing courageous about it. The LGBTQ community has every right in this country straight people have. They are just angry that people are indifferent, they just want to be noticed and put on a pedestal. I could give a rat's ass what someone is, just stop pandering and shoving it down everyone's throat.
Fine-tuned gaydar, brah
Anyway, this thread is terrible
Oh, how I've missed WSO! lol
obviously got in through lbgt, doesn't want competition ^
Regardless of which team I bat for, I cannot condemn this strategy any stronger. The deception endorsed by the original author rivals the enormity of credentials falsification.
Potential, this thread has.
Holy shit, relax. You act like he's murdering someone.
Not to stir the pot, but wouldn't it be easier to claim being bisexual rather than claiming to be gay/lesbian? At least they couldn't call you out for hitting on the opposite gender (as long as you hit on everyone I guess).
Also curious, isn't "sifting people out" as GoldmanBankster describes discriminatory in nature? As in illegal to do so? I can't imagine even if they assumed you were fooling them on your sexual orientation that actually trying to confirm that orientation would violate various federal laws. Maybe it's hard to prove (like age discrimination) so I'm curious.
This would make a decent movie script. The finance equivalent of "I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry". OP, if you ultimately got the job, wouldn't you have to keep the act up your whole time there?
Horrible troll
No firm, by law, can actively engage in hiring practices that discriminate on the basis of national origin, race, religion, gender, disability or age, but the Equal Employment Opportunity act is a suite of federal laws that outline policies and principles for businesses to abide by in order to actively populate their workforce by the attentive devotion to DIVERSITY. Basically, diversity-driven hiring practices, which, to the best of my understanding, manifest as these LGBT events, are legally-sanctioned practices that facilitate the development of a personal values-oriented, organizational culture, which channels its strength from the varied contributions of a heterogeneous workforce. These policies aren’t a license to hire unqualified applicants; rather, they are guiding principles that can root-out and snuff discriminatory hiring practices.
The point of these LGBT events is to highlight a subset of the population that falls into that categorization, and enhance the firm’s visibility on the demographic texture of applicants it is interested in rounding off its workforce with.
you see, I stop taking people seriously when they throw in words just to make a point about how educated they are.
"actively engage" - of course you engage actively, that's straight up redundant "actively populate" - of course you populate actively, that's also straight up redundant "attentive devotion" - when you're devoted to something, it is already implied you're paying attention to it "enhance the firm's visibility on the demographic texture of applicants" - wtf is "demographic texture"
I'm not condemning the author's actions at all, but I think you're trying to enhance the validity of your arguments by throwing in fancy words everywhere, and it's just sounding pedantic
If you are not LGBT and are attending an event under false pretenses of being one, then it is not discriminatory to sift you out. But the gist of what you're saying does make sense. Seems very hard for them to discern what your orientation exactly is, without stepping over some legal line.
In all honesty though, I'm sure that most of the banks have thought of these concerns and probably have taken measures to deal with them accordingly.
How about claiming that you're Latino/African American or Native American? How would they check that? Your skin color doesn't always show your race and you can get into all these ''diversity'' events easily then. Do you guys know people who have done that?
I also don't understand how your sexuality can affect the outcome of your application. Just like affirmative action it's a disaster for these institutions to attract people based on their skin color and sexuality rather than merit.
Not sure if established ethnicity can be surmised from the SSN provided in some applications, but I remember that Colleges request Tribal Affiliation codes for diversity applicants who check the “Native American” box as a means of validating the enhanced consideration that results from your classification. I am unsure whether or not firms adopt a similar means of verification.
Common guys everyone knows that diversity in the workplace can be 100% quantified by how many blacks/women/gays are working at a company.
Hiring candidates based on diversity in upbringing/ideas/talents/thought process would just be crazy.
+1 SB. "Diversity of thought or ideas" is simply a BS excuse for all-white or nearly all-white firms to feel more justified in maintaining a decade old, diversity agnostic recruiting process.
The problem I have with affirmative action is that it really hurts the talented kids of color in my school. From my experience all the worst students who got to my school through all the scholarships based solely on race (not even income) brought kids that make a bad reputation for other students of color. I know some really talented students who always worked hard and deserve the praise for that but they are treated like shit because people assume that they got in the ''easier'' way based on their race. To me it seems that affirmative action really hurts these individuals. When companies employ a similar strategy I can only imagine how many underqualified people get jobs based solely on their race/sexuality. It seems like being a white or Asian heterosexual man hurts you in the application process to BBs.
If there were ever evidence that you do not know what "acting gay" means, this is it.
"I'll suck dick for employment and if the hiring manager doubts me I'll let him watch"
LMAO. Can we front-page this?
I want to hear the answer to this question. Say you get the job through one of these programs OP, would you pretend to be gay for 2 years after?
You don't have to "pretend" anything. Just act normal, it's not like by being labeled as "gay", you are now obliged to openly act like a chick.
FIFY
You are making this argument too black and white. Just because you are gay doesn't mean you need to act like a girl, but there are definitely characteristic differences between those who are straight and those who aren't (for the most part).
I see what you did there
...and you killed it
Haha entirely unintentional, I have to admit. Like it a lot now that I see it though.
I know this is about 4 years old but I'm in the office trying so hard not to cry looking at this
Hahahaha, and this thread has delivered.
Oh you need to own it. It was awesome
Haha one of my better ones. Also, at the risk of sounding weird: read a bunch of your posts recently, very entertaining/informative. Feel like I'm talking to a minor celebrity haha
not sure if ghey
I think you may need to do some more to convince the MD than just talk.
Thanks hah but no way dude. Check the Silver Banana list on the side of the home page. Those are the real celebs.
I'm like the Disney channel star that no one over the age of 12 without kids knows
haha a bunch of them become pretty popular later on...something to aspire to maybe. good luck w your douchey boss.
This is one of the funniest things I've ever read on this site
I'm not feeling this idea. Why don't you just bust ass, learn something, network, be very socially involved on campus, and show initiative through side projects/ECs/etc... This way, you might actually bring something to the table when you get hired--like actual dedication/interest, knowledge, and genuine contacts.
The idea of a person's sexuality influencing their employment chances is so stupid I don't see a problem with OP working the system.
Just act bi, then you have an excuse for hitting on the females.
heister got that one straight on!
Hardly.
lmao
Not only is this morally very questionable, but it can land you in trouble assuming you are serious about going through with the charade.
You might land the interview and even the job, but these are the type of things that eventually come out (no pun intended). How long can you pretend on the job? You will go out with your fellow bankers to bars and clubs, and one day (under the most awkward circumstances the truth will actually be revealed). Also I am sure there are tons of people at your school who already know you are straight. Some of them may end up working at the same firm, or even before that, in the interview process, a couple of really competitive jerks might even blab to HR if they learn you are close to getting the job. There are a million loose ends here.
And once word gets out, which it will, they will sack your ass. You will find it really hard to find a job at another firm for this fraud (ref checks+wall street is a really small place), and this will also probably screw your chances at b-school.
In other words, don't do it. It's morally unsound, and the risk-reward tradeoff is entirely irrational.
1.) Your first issue a problem AFTER I am already in the job. Also keep in mind analyst turnover rate is very high.
2.) Yup that's definitely a problem, haha shoot....
As long as you're ok with giving up any chance of banging the HR chick after she reads that on your app (nevermind being fired and blackballed), then I guess...
Calling out shots like Babe Ruth
https://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/how-to-get-an-internship-in-inve…
I vote do it, really wouldn't hurt if you "were" some % Native American and go to the other diversity event as well. Nothing screams auto hire in 2017 like a gay Iroquois that requires Visa sponsorship.
OP - just say you hit from both sides of the plate, you can still date women and have talks about broads at work.
You are absurd for considering this.
Second
could get you blacklisted from the bank.
Big Watch - NG
Just to be safe you should have sex with some men before you go
Faking LGBT (Originally Posted: 09/27/2013)
Okay so it's almost impossible to fake one's ethnicity and be a minority. That said, LGBT are also considered minorities and given preference at many top banks. If I were to fake being gay then would that harm me in any way?
this +1
troll post
How is it "impossible" to fake being a minority? Everyone thinks I'm Hispanic, although I'm far from it. Hell, people at my first job in high school talked to me in Spanish because they thought I did not understand English.
I hear 10 black men come into the room and one of them will take you home for the night.
An employer cannot ask you anything that could reveal your race, gender, religion or sexuality. If I recall correctly, NFL teams asked prospective players "if the liked girls or if they had a girlfriend", which is against the law. The NY State Attorney wrote a letter to the NFL explaining that it's against the law for a prospective employer to inquire about your sexuality.
Dude just go blackface. African-American gay guy FTW.
DO IT
Tossing OP a SB for messing with the system. The way to stop discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation is to stop discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation.
Good point Amphipathic. It's kind of ridiculous that banks even consider sexuality as a factor. Fake diversity is not beneficial in the long run. People start cheating the system with faking it either sexually or racially especially since banks officially can't ask about these in the applications. Although every application I sent had race questions in it, they still claim that they don't look at skin color when you're applying.
Would you pretend to be LGBT for an edge? (Originally Posted: 08/14/2011)
Since there are lots of scholarships and opportunities available for LGBT individuals, would you play it off as being a bisexual male in order to take advantage of these? Does bi curious count? And, furthermore, is it gay if you're just getting your dick sucked and not sucking dick? HOW CAN THEY TELL? If they question you about your sexuality can you go ahead and sue them? :D
awaiting flames and jokes about sucking dick @ SAC Capital and crossdressing
...and they wonder why our financial system is so fucked up.
LOL!
fag
You ever suck dick for coke? No? Well, would you suck dick for a Harvard MBA?
DM- No, #2, quite possibly. :>
If you do it, keep us posted.
if your a top maybe.. bottom... no hahaha
If you don't want to go with LGBT thing, you can always tell them you're black. If they question it tell them you're the reincarnation of MLK (in off-white) and how dare they judge you based on the color of your skin.
.
Lmao. If the LGBT doesn't pan out I'm sure you could pull off a skirt and attend the women's weekends ;p
Just tuck and tape
This is brilliant...they can't verify someone's sexual orientation, and bi-curious is even tougher to tell. Besides, just drop the act after the first day of classes and "discover" how straight you really are.....who the hell is going to stop you?
Dude, seriously though, I think you're taking this a bit far, yes?
People in this field go to great lengths for career progression and compensation progression. If working 80 hour weeks for the majority of your 20s and at least half of your 30s isn't taking it too far, then pretending to be a fudge packer surely isn't.
Make sure to put it on your resume. Do it!
Becoming LGBT to get Banking Job (Originally Posted: 01/07/2010)
Hello, I am a senior and want to talk about my friend who had problems with recruiting for SA positions, and he decided to join the LGBT society in college to become a minority. Basically, he is pulling himself off as being gay. He said that it would get him more interviews, and since he will be a minority, it will help land him a job.
All in all, it worked. He got a FT job at a BB IBD, and now he is wondering how he should proceed in this situation. He wants to become "himself" again, and he thought it won't be a big deal once training starts that he starts hitting on women.
For people working already, do you think it is all fine and dandy for what this person did?
not as good as my troll thread, learn from the master
make sure they know this through the multitude of triangles on your resume. i prefer to put them in liu of bullet points or as a giant background watermark.
You mean he didn't use hearts as bullet points?
LOL
i just LOLed out loud when i saw this thread
LOL again LLOLOLOLOL
Hilarious I admit.
A great idea.
you waste a lot of our time on this board, but this one was actually funny.
This is disgusting. Shows what a decrepit human being this loser is.
I wonder how many people changes their sexual orientation to become a woman to get an IBD job...
Imagine if you were a disabled, homosexual, native american who was also a veteran. Talk about jackpot!
Good thing I'm a veteran or I might have to start sucking dick.
^ I heard you can go straight into PE with those kinds of misfortunes ^ ^ ^
gay dudes make great powerpoints, such a knack for aesthetics...
Anyone ever see that HBO special where they had a homosexual man at an investment bank in LA. They took is car and wrote butt pirate all over it. It went to arbitration after they fired him.
^bump
Dude just take the offer "you got" from GS:
//www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/under-gs-background-check-by-first-advan…
.
I'm not sure why people are acting like this is the weirdest thing ever. I don't know how JPM would ever figure out that I'm not gay and I don't think it would be a big deal at all even if they did. It's like going to a target schools info sessions from a non-target, you aren't really a student there and it may upset some people but others might even be impressed at your tenacity.
It's not like I'm going to meet people there and they're going to introduce me as gay. I don't think it will even matter once I actually meet people.
Besides, worst case scenario I can claim I am a "yestergay" (real thing).
Dude, if you already had your mind made up, why the fuck did you need to make a thread about it?
//www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/under-gs-background-check-by-first-advan…
What is your problem? Why have you said that twice now, I didn't say anything about an offer from GS, I just said you should be prepared to explain why you put the wrong date on your resume when you're getting a background check. I didn't imply in the least that I had an offer from GS.
Lotta gays there, they'll probably call your bluff
Sounds like a pretty bad idea once everyone realize that you cheated.
Basically, if you're an Obama voting liberal Democrat then JPM wants you to join up. The only thing they are missing is AFL-CIO members, Green Peace Activists, and Muslims.
DCDepository pretty much summed it up nicely.
DickFuld if you've been here not even 2 weeks and are already targeting people and calling them names then you should consider joining another forum where you can express your life frustration. It's a finance forum and let's keep it that way. I can only hope @AndyLouis noticed your rotten behavior. I know you run out of MS to throw at me. Since you read WSO for a year you did not have anything productive to post for 12 months and it sums you up pretty well (no experience in finance whatsoever). Please stop your targeting of people and let's all learn on WSO.
Can we pause for a second and reflect on me becoming a prominent WSO poster? Thanks.
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