Risk versus Return
Risk versus return.
Should I hedge my banking offer by getting another banking offer? Maybe one of the firms won't go down! I know I'll get from a real commercial bank and one from those pretend BHCs.
I wonder if you're related to the guy who went long on CDO squareds while going long on CDOs and thought that was a hedge.
I have a banking offer. Should I accept and then get an offer from one of those FMP things, I mean really, I got a banking offer how hard could getting FMP be? How about OPS? Even state schoolers get those. And I don't even think public universities are accredited. Oh! I should get the ops and banking offer from the same firm! That way in case one fails, I have the other to fall back on. And in six months, I can tell them that I'm rockstar that knows excel! I do a million repetitions of Alt+I+R and Alt+++= before I go to sleep. And that I pretend that my business card from Citi says Financial Analyst Global Investment Banking instead of Finance Analyst Global Douchebag Liability Management.
Gee, I hope they don't use Microsoft Access in ops. Cause then I'm fucked. Maybe I should have paid attention in those MIS/CIS/CSI:Miami classes. Naaa..I'm a rockstar. I'll pick it up once my fingers hit the keyboard.
I could renege on the FMP as long my firm doesn't rescind my offer. FMP's can go into banking right? Cause, I mean although I have my trust fund, I can't imagine going to a black tie affair and tell people I work in industry. I guess I can say I'm a captain of industry..but I'd be so pitiful against those masters of the universe, well the ones who still have their jobs. I wonder if my parents would disown me.
But what about Ethics, I took that class. What about Karma, you know, the thing that My Name Is Earl talks about. What about my conscience, will I feel guilty. Naah, those big asshole banks don't give a fuck about me, why should I give a fuck about them?!
Risk versus return. To be 21 again during this market, I wonder if I would go through this same thought process. Would I really have been that big a douche? Getting multiples offers just to renege on them shortly before graduation. Heh or just holding onto them and pushing them back for a month or two just in case my company goes bankrupt shortly after bonuses are paid out.
Or thinking that just because I went to a top school, staties were below me. Just because I had professors that taught me how to use solver and goal seek that I could rock out with my cock out even in ops.
Hedging offers..taking jobs that are risky..
And I wonder how we got into the mess we are in today? I wonder if the traders, lenders, borrowers ever applied the thought process that some of these kids are thinking about.
I wonder if these people thought about taking calculated risks or even actual hedging, or even just listened to the guys that said taking BBB tranche loans and making them into AAA rated CDOs was retarded or creating a ponzi scheme out of credit default swaps would blow up in your face, would we be in this mess?
This isn't directed towards anyone. Its just that so many undergrads are thinking this way. Did the banks really fuck us all up so bad like they did the economy? I guess times are hard.
I'm just writing random shit, not trying to judge anybody, problems are worse. Did you guys hear about what happened in mumbai?
I wonder if there's some jackass out there thinking how can he make money off of this. I guess this is really "Wall Street bitch." Maybe I don't belong here. I started working in restructuring and I see the senior bankers get so excited when companies go down.
I don't know. I wonder if anything was in the sandwich I ordered from Pump or was it energy kitchen?
...i guess there must've been some 'shrooms in that sandwich. either that or the hours are getting to me after three years. damn.
..still can't believe i wrote all that garbage..
You are fucked up
Hahahaha....but entertaining it certainly is! And I love the pic that goes with it...whoever picks those out has a hand for hitting it spot on:)))
Cornelius, you nailed the current graduating senior stream-of-consciousness sentiment right now perfectly.
You have been working in restructuring at a BB bank for the past 3 years?
i was in a coverage group at a BB for a little bit over two years. i was lucky enough to still have an offer for a third year. but my group was dead silent during the summer, a lot of my favorite ppl left (either by choice or "market conditions") and this continued on. In good markets things would pick up in August/September not this time around. So I started looking for other things, unfortunately I started looking shortly before the apocalypse. But I got an offer with a restructuring firm have been here since end of Sept.
I'm inclined to agree with you.
Hilarious.
Sarcasm at its finest.
i'd like to hear a closing sober argument, even if just by pm.
anyway, i am curious...
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