Thoughts on this quote: "Happiness is really just about four things: 1) perceived control, 2) perceived progress, 3) connectedness (number and depth of your relationships), and vision/meaning (being part of something bigger than yourself)."

I think it's the most succinct way to summarize what makes life feel fulfilling. Anyone disagree? Why?

 

Honestly don't think it's too far off. I think one and two are more perceived happiness, while three and four feel more organic. Especially three. I can't really enter the mind of other people but I know people who have been pretty fucked over by life but are still happy because of their relationships and just feeling like a part of a network of people who care about one another.

Dayman?
 
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I'd argue it's not actually about those things but rather to what degree are you at peace with your current state in those things. for example, I could not have a ton of control but if I'm at peace with that, I'm happy. I could be at a plateau in some of my goals but if I'm at peace with that, I'm happy.

happiness is more about mindset in my opinion

 

How much do you think being able to accept life as it is and be happy is dependent on having that "love base" in your life (among family, friends, significant others)? I notice I find myself being "okay" when things aren't in my control or progressing how I would like only when I stop to remember the people in my life that love and support me. I don't know if I would be as passive about it if I felt isolated or had no true deep relationships.

 

I would argue it’s a combination. I think your current position in regards to these 4 things gives you a range of possible happiness outcomes, and mindset determines where you fit on the range. For example, let’s arbitrarily say the happiness scale is 0-100, and my personal situation puts me between 45-65 (range size is arbitrary and could depend on person). If I have a theoretically perfect mindset, I can get to 65, and if I have a horrible mindset, it’s at 45. No matter how good my mindset is, I can never get to say 85 unless my position in regards to the 4 quoted things improves.

I would also be open to the range always starting at 0 because a mindset can almost always be so bad it makes you completely miserable. I firmly think that your max potential is limited to some extent by these 4 things, though.

 

+1 SB. I agree that being at peace is important. If you're at peace with your place in the world, you don't necessarily need to be constantly progressing.

....also consider that you eventually will hit retirement where you are no long progressing in career etc.  So if that's a key component to happiness, everyone would be miserable in retirement.

 

I don't think progress has to be in your career. You could be making life progress by moving on to the next stage of your life. Or even if you're 35 and your career is stagnant, you could feel that you're developing and making progress emotionally/mentally. Mindset progress still counts as progress by my definition.

 

Thanks, I think it's similar.

someone to love = connectedness
something to do = vision/meaning
something to hope for = perceived progress
the ability to have these 3 things = perceived control

 
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I agree that these things can make you happy but on a deeper level, I think what ultimately makes people happy is having something that gives their lives meaning. This can come from your career, relationships, leisure but without meaning you can't truly experience any kind of happiness aside from the base neurochemical experience of dopamine. 

To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.
 

Pizz

Can you truly be happy at a place like a hedge fund? Given the stress of the job and unpredictability/lack of control?

I always think of a hedge fund with a corporate culture like on Billions is the dream. 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

Purpose is a major component and the second major component is accepting and understanding the difference between those things that are yours (emphasis added) and those things that are not yours, meaning outside of your control. Stoic philosophy truly captures the essence of the human condition and provides a practical solution to transcending the material limitations inherent in our finite lives

 
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"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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