Time off for grievance/child-birth vs work responsibility

Listening on ESPN radio (Colin Cowherd) about Brian Urlacher taking some time away from team because his mother died. Colin mentioned a guy was benched last year for missing a game because of birth of his child (I disgree w/ team doing this). Colin also mentions that pro-athletes should plan to have the birth of their child during the off season (I agree w/ this). Most life/family situations come before the call of duty (work), but sometimes they don't.

For the professional monkeys out there:

What are rules in high-end finance/hf/pe careers for taking grievance time / missing time for birth of child? ie your mom passes away back home, how long are you able to be away from your job for? Do you get time off for birth of your child? (ie a couple days, a day, an hour?)

Would/have you purposely plan to have your child born during a less busy time of year for you (if that exists)?

Anyone had to make a important work vs family decision like this? For example - extremely important meeting to attend vs birth of your child.

The higher the job responsibility, I agree there are times when work comes first, but when?

 
Flake:
Sometimes making babies is not an exact science.

obviously, but say your 80hr/week high-end hf manager, and july-aug happens to be easier months for you - to guarantee that you could be there for the birth of your child, are there guys out there that would plan ahead (9mo's earlier) to try to plan to have the baby during this time?

I know some of the super-analytical guys out there might actually think way...?

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from facebook:

"John : That scenario happened to a member of my team (Coast Guard special ops) during pre-deployment training, when the commander denied his leave request to attend his son’s birth. We hadn’t even left the country yet!

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Best Response

Agree, but I'm heavily biased towards being family oriented. This isn't a fucking CIA op in Hong Kong: sports are a non-essential industry and a form of entertainment for Christ's sake. And people wonder why civilization is breaking down on some levels: our society has lost focus of what actually matters in the long run.

As for finance, there are no "rules" per se, but if you're not around at a crucial moment, welllll you snooze you lose so you have to pick your priorities. It's not a family friendly industry, especially at the junior levels. This is the major downside to most white collar jobs that the glorified version of uncut capitalism forgets: all the other facets of civilization require attention and will start cannibalizing each other and then eventually even capitalism itself.

Too much short term greed destroys itself and everyone involved. Avarice is a primary sin in the Catholic religion because it's a dangerous addiction of the mind. Sorry but barring some crisis that requires me to be there, if a boss did this to me I'd knock him the fuck out or worse.

Get busy living
 
UFOinsider:
This isn't a fucking CIA op in Hong Kong: sports are a non-essential industry and a form of entertainment for Christ's sake.

I agree with you, and think its dumb that people would be pissed that he left the team for a few days to grieve the loss of his mother.

However, I can see the other side of the argument as he is paid a great deal of money for the entertainment he provides and the public finances the stadium in which he provides that entertainment.

[quote=patternfinder]Of course, I would just buy in scales. [/quote] See my WSO Blog | my AMA
 
Simple As...:
UFOinsider:
This isn't a fucking CIA op in Hong Kong: sports are a non-essential industry and a form of entertainment for Christ's sake.

I agree with you, and think its dumb that people would be pissed that he left the team for a few days to grieve the loss of his mother.

However, I can see the other side of the argument as he is paid a great deal of money for the entertainment he provides and the public finances the stadium in which he provides that entertainment.

How much damage did this cause? He was gone what, half a day? A couple of hours?

Our society is promoting money, power, and fame at the expense of everything else, and this is usually the beginning of the end for a civilization. A young, single analyst can do this, but 20-30 year old single people are A) the minority and B) not responsible enough to run anything...this dangerous cult of youth culture taking primacy over everything else is very, very, very bad to showcase in the public domain. Unless there's more to the story (I have a feeling there is) I'm giving this a thumb's down.

I respect your opinion, but I really do see it this way.

Get busy living
 
Simple As...:
UFOinsider:
This isn't a fucking CIA op in Hong Kong: sports are a non-essential industry and a form of entertainment for Christ's sake.

I agree with you, and think its dumb that people would be pissed that he left the team for a few days to grieve the loss of his mother.

However, I can see the other side of the argument as he is paid a great deal of money for the entertainment he provides and the public finances the stadium in which he provides that entertainment.

But he was on my fantasy football team! He better be getting fired, i'm now down 2 points. This is unacceptable.

 

No question family comes first in those instances. If you're in the middle of a live deal maybe make it a little short but I don't wanna work in a team that wouldn't allow you to duck out for a little bit if a family member passes or your kid is born.

I work for a pretty tough group (for Canada) but I'd like to think even they would be understanding in those instances.

 

Sometimes the best way to get over things/grieve is to work (get your mind off of it).

With that being said, family always comes first. Any analyst who is fired or pro athlete is benched for a prolonged period of time for his fucking CHILD being born or parents' death, is absolutely insane. I would never want to work for a company who places ZERO value on its employees' emotional well-being and are money-whores.

There are more important things in life than money. Unfortunately it takes most of us too long to realize this.

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
 

This topic is so circumstance-dependent as to be nearly useless for broad discussion. There is no universal answer to the question whether or not personal leave of absence should be allowed. We cannot and should not dictate the "Leave of Absence" policies of all corporations and companies. There are two very good arguments in favor of being generous, however- employee satisfaction and common decency. If you are in a highly competitive field, if the employees feel that the employer is fair and understands that uncontrolled, exigent crises happen and should be addressed, the employees will be that much more likely to give 110%. There is a mutual understanding that the well-being of the employee and employer are symbiotic. But, if they feel unappreciated and entirely expendable, that will likely affect their work. If your employer 'doesn't care that your mother died, you have a report due Friday', it makes it very difficult to be enthusiastic about maximizing value. Look at highly competitive places and observe their policies. Goldman Sachs comes to mind. Apparently, when they are trimming the fat at various levels, they inform the employee, but keep them on for several months. This allows them to search for a job while leveraging the GS name. Now, this is how they treat someone, by their own estimation, they no longer need. Consider how they would/should treat an employee they want to retain.

Now, I completely agree with contractual arrangement governing the relationship. For example, the football player could offer to waive payment under the contract for the games he would not attend. I understand the "I'm paying you to do a job, not take a vacation or cry at home" hardline that some have espoused. I'm merely pointing out that such a harsh policy will likely produce more discontent and ineffectiveness that will outweigh the 1 or 2 weeks (or even a month) an employee may need for personal reasons. There are psychological considerations that have to be made that are incompatible with being unrelenting.

Bene qui latuit, bene vixit- Ovid
 

Guys,I 'm sorry but nobody in finance is saving lives or the world so I would not understand why people would be prevented from taking some time off to grieve or to be present for a childbirth. Would bosses rather keep people at work who are not into it and fuck up on a deal because they were not focused? Yes we are supposed to be a different breed in finance but does that apply to our loved ones? How do you explain to your son that you were not present during his childbirth because you were working. It might not be significant to us but think about the message it sends to our loved ones. No wonder families are so fucked up, we have our priorities twisted up if you ask me.

The dragon dozes off in the spirit which is its dwelling.
 

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