TOP WALL STREET BARTENDING SCHOOL COCKTAILS

With the market down, there’s been an increase in enrollment at New York Bartending Schools; NYBS has had an 18 percent jump in enrollment. Dealbreaker reports that laid off bankers are finding it difficult to bounce back with jobs at other firms, thus they are now seeking alternative employment in the bar industry and learning the ins-and-outs of mixing drinks.

So, what kind of drinks are former Wall Street employees mixing these days? Here’re a few of the most popular---surprisingly named after notorious out-of-control Stock Traders:

1) THE NICK LESSON HIGHBALL
Battery acid passed off as top-shelf bourbon in order to defraud bar patrons out of $1.4 billion drink price.

2) THE FRANK GRUTTADAURIA SCREWDRIVER
On the bar menu it says this cocktail has vodka and orange juice. But those ingredients have been falsified and have never really existed, thus screwing customers out of more than $25 million.

3) SEX ON DAVID BULLEN’S BEACH
The price of this drink is used, without the consent of the bar patron, as security for ingredients on other bar patron’s drinks, then the entire transaction is falsified in order to cover the bartender’s tracks.

4) STUART E. WINKLER SLIPPERY NIPPLE
A drink that will get you so drunk you’ll plot to kill a Manhattan judge.
All ingredients are defrauded.