What is the meaning of life? Afraid of becoming an adult...
I am having some tough weeks and would like to get your advice. I am a rising junior at a top target and I signed like 2 months ago an offer for a top group at EB for next summer, and as the stress of recruiting went away, I started to become very sad. I used to be so happy about my offer once I got it and signed but as I went back to the town I was raised in for the summer (middle of nowhere, none has ever heard of banking) I started to think about life be sad for a few reasons:
-I realized that even tho I signed for an awesome group, I will be very hard to make a difference in the world (many other analysts were in that group before me and we have never heard from them)
-If it will be very hard to make a difference in the world, what should our goals be? have a nice family/have a great career/help people?
-I realized that besides a very very small group of people I cannot get validation for my job, I don't even tell my HS friends what I am doing with my career since they would not care/understand. I think this makes me sad because I have worked so hard for something for such a long time and 99.99% of people do not understand the work I/we all put in.
-I realized I am scared by being an adult - I think that having an offer made me realize that being an adult will come soon and I am not sure I am ready. Even tho I understand I am lucky for being on track for a career that will make me financially comfortable I am scared about so many things: where will I be in 20 years, who will I marry, will I have kids, where will I work, will I be happy/satisfied?
-I realized I am kinda alone, my parents passed away when I was a kid, and I have no real friends from back home and very few good friends from college. I really hope my intern class will be good and I will make great friendships and hopefully soon find a girlfriend for the long run.
I am not looking for any answers in particular but I would appreciate it if other people could share some advice on how to approach this situation/becoming an adult