What is your biggest fear?

My biggest fear is not being able to visit all the places I want to see before I die.
Or visiting all of them (about 60% done already) and having "no where else to explore."

But at that point the logical next step would be launching off a canyon edge sans parachute, so that's not too scary.

What's yours?

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Comments (85)

Aug 18, 2018 - 10:11pm
MonacoMonkey:

My biggest fear is not being able to visit all the places I want to see before I die.
Or visiting all of them (about 60% done already) and having "no where else to explore."

But at that point the logical next step would be launching off a canyon edge sans parachute, so that's not too scary.

What's yours?

You fear not being able to travel more than getting Lorena Bobbitted?

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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Aug 24, 2018 - 1:48am

Being bored. If my week consisted of nothing meaningful except for looking forward to watching whatever night football.... I don't know what I would do.

β€œThe three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
Aug 24, 2018 - 6:11am

Becoming bedridden due to some shitty illness or accident.

Recently watched a close family member go from 100% mobile and active, to being confined to a bed 24/7 in just a couple of months, while being mentally sharp. The depression almost seems worse than the physical aspect of it.

Aug 24, 2018 - 10:32am

^^^THIS^^^
Same here. A really good friend has multiple sclerosis. We've been watching it steadily take away her physical mobility/fine motor skills over the years. Our menfolk just went to Saratoga for their annual boys' weekend and I hung out with her, went out shopping, to dinner and stayed overnight. Very humbling having to feed and change and help a grown adult with virtual every single need as if they were an infant. She can't walk, can't hold a drink, but damn if she still isn't 100% sharp, aware and still has that wicked, twisted humor and outlook, but I know she also gets the blues something fierce, thinking that she's a burden to her family and friends.

Aug 24, 2018 - 2:18pm

MonacoMonkey : If you're the adventurous type, you'll never run out of places to travel. I started traveling all over the world in 2008 during my down time. It took about four years to go to all the places I originally wanted to go. However, the more I traveled and the more people I met, the more places that have been added to the list. Inevitably some get addicted to the travel as I have.

I've started a family now, but still find that I'm constantly seeking opportunities to go to new places. I've sought out job opportunities where I can be an expat with my family (very difficult to find). Most of our vacations are to different countries. In fact, before I married my wife I was up front with her, and said it probably wouldn't work out if she expected to stay in one place. I told her we could be living anywhere at any time (Saudi Arabia was a possibility at that time). Luckily, I have an adventurous wife who was on the same page with me.

So don't worry, there are always new places to explore. More than likely, you'll be the one who will decide when you've had enough, and want to settle down (if ever).

As far as fears go:

Agree with losing my physical abilities, but the other fear is losing cognitive abilities.

Physically, I'm an active person, and always on the move, so I'd go crazy if I was immobile.

Mentally, I have seen first hand the effects of Alzheimer/Dementia. I can't imagine going through life not knowing who I am, and placing the burden on someone else to care for me. Especially, when I that person knows I will never be able to recognize their efforts. My wife knows that if it comes to that, I opt out.

Sep 2, 2018 - 9:14pm

To your point about finding an expat gig, have you found any good opps within finance (that's not corp. fin)? I grew up an expat and have been doing banking overseas for several years now and am well seeing that true expat gigs can have it much better than banking, as they pay for housing, schooling, etc. Beginning to think hard about that as my son will be starting school soon and it's like half a post-tax bonus to pay for private school.

Aug 24, 2018 - 5:37pm

I have 2 fears.
1) Exotic birds ex: (Tu-cans, Parrots, Aracari, and any kind of bird in the Hornbill family)

2) Not finding meaning in life.

Both scare the shit out of me, and I usually go into deep depressing just thinking about them.

Aug 25, 2018 - 9:04am

Exotic birds don't scare me, but the idea of ever coming across a bird eating spider makes me shit my pants.

Array
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Sep 3, 2018 - 11:29pm

I agree with you on this. I think Mark Cuban said that is his greatest fear as well

β€œThe three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
Aug 28, 2018 - 4:32pm

Before being a father: my biggest fear was being stuck in a career that pigeon holed me that would railroad future prospects (it hasn't);

After being a father: not being able to provide the financial support for my kid to go to university - something I never had; pretty much everything on the internet that my kid can see/hear - there's too much noise to filter.

Aug 28, 2018 - 4:46pm

Wasting my life:

  • Doing things I hate doing
  • Being around people I don't like
  • Not experiencing the things I want to experience
  • Wasting time over the trivialities of life (drama, opinions, etc).

All of this is easier said than done though...but we keep trudging forward and trying :)

I think- therefore I fuck
Sep 2, 2018 - 8:27pm

Biggest fear: Getting to the end of my life and realizing I should have done things differently.

Currently attempting the solution of early retirement at 51.

Sep 2, 2018 - 9:58pm

1 Not figuring out the meaning to life (or rather, to my life)

2 Not finding someone that I really love that loves me back (kind of tied to the first one? who knows...)

Surprisingly, nothing career or money related (although this is the main focus of my life right now) - how paradoxical.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:32pm

Under-cooked chicken or pork.

"I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars, buddy. A player. Or nothing. " -GG
Sep 6, 2018 - 3:33pm

My biggest fear when I start working next year... (Originally Posted: 11/25/2006)

is not the long hours, but the thought of gaining weight and getting out of shape.

I have been playing sports all of my life and I have been using sports to stay in shape. I know that I will not have too much opportunity to play tennis or even go to the gym. A friend of mine who played football in college gained 20 pounds after 4 months of working in the industry. I am really scared that I will gain a few pounds or lose the motivation to work out and stay in shape after long hours of working.

That said, how often do you get to go to the gym? What do you do to keep yourself in shape when you don't have too much time to exercise?

Thanks

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:34pm

Yep, that's a very valid fear.

I go to the gym pretty much every day before my morning shower (unless things are completely crazy).

Of course, I can only stay for about twenty minutes, and even that costs me twenty minutes of sleep. Doesn't do much good, but it's something.

You can also run up and down the stairs in your building during down time. That also doesn't do much good, but at least it elevates your heart rate and keeps you from feeling like a total slug.

But honestly, you will have so much more to worry about than the shape of your body. Not that this is good news, but you probably won't care all that much. You'll just do whatever you can to get the work done for the day, then go home and collapse and be grateful you're not at work. At least for the first year or so.

Sorry, dude.

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Sep 6, 2018 - 3:42pm
Mis Ind:
Yep, that's a very valid fear.

I go to the gym pretty much every day before my morning shower (unless things are completely crazy).

Of course, I can only stay for about twenty minutes, and even that costs me twenty minutes of sleep. Doesn't do much good, but it's something.

You can also run up and down the stairs in your building during down time. That also doesn't do much good, but at least it elevates your heart rate and keeps you from feeling like a total slug.

But honestly, you will have so much more to worry about than the shape of your body. Not that this is good news, but you probably won't care all that much. You'll just do whatever you can to get the work done for the day, then go home and collapse and be grateful you're not at work. At least for the first year or so.

Sorry, dude.

Hi Miss Ind, thanks for your response.

I did banking last summer at a boutique firm and I worked, on average, between 80 to 90 hours a week. My boss was nice enough to let me get out of the office between 5PM~6PM, every day, to do whatever I wanted, so I hit up NYSC, which is right down the street from where I worked at. My boss was really into sports as well, being an athelete in college, so we worked out together and played tennis whenever we had some downtime.

If I can manage my time well: eat well, and get some cardio (3 times a week at least), I will be fine. I could be wrong, but we shall see.

Anyway, how do you like CS-NY? I will be working at CS-SF next year and the training commences in NY next summer. Looking forward to meeting you then.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:36pm

I don't think it should be your BIGGEST fear...but your health concerns are legit. Your friend probably didn't adapt his diet to a sedentary lifestyle and was probably wolfing down portions that were identical to his playing days.

With the muscle atrophy and all the fat piling in...it happens.

And Aspiringmonkey I wouldn't go so far as to call him very shallow...

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:37pm

just regular shallow?

MonkeyBusiness:
I don't think it should be your BIGGEST fear...but your health concerns are legit. Your friend probably didn't adapt his diet to a sedentary lifestyle and was probably wolfing down portions that were identical to his playing days.

With the muscle atrophy and all the fat piling in...it happens.

And Aspiringmonkey I wouldn't go so far as to call him very shallow...

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:43pm

I worked at a mid-market IB in NYC last summer, worked on average 90-100 hours/Week. I had a membership at Crunch literally 5 mins from my crib...and I still managed to go only about 10 times in 3 months.. really pathetic and a big waste of money

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:45pm

Sunlounger, I'm in the same position as you. I love lifting weights at the gym, and I know I won't have time for that next year. I think I'm gonna by a boxflex to keep at home, and hit that up a few times a week in the mornings...

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:46pm

Yea, I have the same fear. As well as just being absolutely miserable.

I go to a pretty tough college where everyone is so stressed out and depressed all the time. What happens when these people graduate and enter the banking world? How do you deal with the stress when you don't seem to have any time to de-stress?

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:47pm

Seriously...in the absence of exercise...muscle is gonna waste away. The only thing you can do, given the limited amount of time you have to exercise is watch your diet. You'd be surprised how much cutting OUT sodas, coffees, whipped lattes and snacks can do for you.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:48pm

In my group over the summer most of the younger bankers took a gym break in the evening and then came back later to finish up their work late into the night. Others went in the morning. But either way it definitely seemed to be an accepted part of the group's culture to try to work in some exercise. It's definitely important both for your health and sanity.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:49pm

just buy some dumbbells and lift some weights for 10 minutes each morning. Muscle fades away when you are not using it, to maintain your current muscle mass just lifting those dumbbells is sufficient.

But I'm not broly, so it might be different at that level


Disclaimer: The post above has been made by someone who is not currently employed in IBD, and has not had an interview yet...

Sep 6, 2018 - 4:11pm
aspiringmonkey:
just buy some dumbbells and lift some weights for 10 minutes each morning. Muscle fades away when you are not using it, to maintain your current muscle mass just lifting those dumbbells is sufficient.

But I'm not broly, so it might be different at that level


Disclaimer: The post above has been made by someone who is not currently employed in IBD, and has not had an interview yet...

Lifting dumbells for 10 minutes a day is not going to be sufficient to maintain much muscle. You'd probably be better off doing pushups and situps at home. You can also get a pretty good exercise bike for $700-1000 that would allow you to do some good cardio at home. The problem is that it's difficult to go to bed right after exercising so you'd probably have to use it in the morning.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:50pm

Several times as a summer analyst I tried this: when I have 15 free minutes, I'll run downstairs, jog down the block, chop up a homeless person, and head back up to the office. The adrenaline rush is great, and after less than 15 min I can be back at my desk hitting up the spreadsheets.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:52pm

aspiringmonkey:
there aren't any homeless people in NYC


Disclaimer: The post above has been made by someone who is not currently employed in IBD, and has not had an interview yet...

You gotta be kidding me...

Either way...simply put there is no way to keep an athletic body in tip top form with 10 mins and just one pair of dumbells...

It's going to require an acknowledgement that you have to change your diet and realise you just simply won't get remotely the same amount of exercise.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:53pm

Do you guys have trouble getting up in the morning? With what very little sleep you get I'd be afraid that I'd sleep in too late too many times and get fired. I'd like not sleep because I'm afraid that would happen. The cause of oversleeping is sleep and if you don't sleep in the first place you would never be late for work.

"We are lawyers! We sue people! Occasionally, we get aggressive and garnish wages, but WE DO NOT ABDUCT!" -Boston Legal-
Sep 6, 2018 - 3:54pm

Ken, I usually wake up at around 7... but then again, there is no "usually" in this job.

Sunlounger, I don't work at CS.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:55pm

Holymonkey, getting up in the morning can be difficult. A first-thing double-shot of espresso can help. Additionally, a healthy terror of being fired helps more.

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:56pm
Mis Ind:
Holymonkey, getting up in the morning can be difficult. A first-thing double-shot of espresso can help. Additionally, a healthy terror of being fired helps more.

I'm sure you have a nice body Mis Ind

Sep 6, 2018 - 3:57pm

Heh. Not to be mean, but what's the point? Are you saying I have a nice body because I'm probably terrified of being fired and thus have no trouble getting up in the morning to go to the gym?

I do think I have a nice body... but that's not awfully relevant here, is it? Next people will be asking for pictures again. And come on, if guys really want to see hotness, they should google some up for themselves. Besides, my hotness is too hot for teh intarweb. The internet tubes would explode from the very hotness of Mis Ind and all our banks would lose millions of dollars while people worked to get the tubes up and running again. And you don't want that, do you? So stop talking about my body. You don't want to sound like the kind of guy that doesn't get laid enough. ;)

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Sep 6, 2018 - 3:59pm
Mis Ind:
Heh. Not to be mean, but what's the point? Are you saying I have a nice body because I'm probably terrified of being fired and thus have no trouble getting up in the morning to go to the gym?

I do think I have a nice body... but that's not awfully relevant here, is it? Next people will be asking for pictures again. And come on, if guys really want to see hotness, they should google some up for themselves. Besides, my hotness is too hot for teh intarweb. The internet tubes would explode from the very hotness of Mis Ind and all our banks would lose millions of dollars while people worked to get the tubes up and running again. And you don't want that, do you? So stop talking about my body. You don't want to sound like the kind of guy that doesn't get laid enough. ;)

Allright, I get it, you're not into men. You should just say that outright instead of beating around the bush (no pun intended).

Sep 6, 2018 - 4:01pm

Somebody a while back suggested buying an erg (rowing machine) for one's apartment, and spending 20-30 mins a day on it. Seems like a good enough idea--at least you don't have to jump through all the usual hoops of actually going to the gym if you don't have the time.

I think that will be my priority purchase for when I move in July...

Sep 6, 2018 - 4:03pm

Dude, I like guys. And girls. Love 'em both, though admittedly I can easily live without girls, while I kinda, y'know, need a man around the house. Know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying. Yeah, I can tell. I can read your mind, man. I know exactly what you're picturing right now. Heh.

At any rate, props to you for bringing up both my physical hotness and my sexual proclivities in the same thread, completely hijacking the topic of the original poster. You win the desperate dude award. But don't feel bad, man. Half the guys out here have behaved the same way on this board at one point or another.

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Sep 6, 2018 - 4:07pm
Mis Ind:
Dude, I like guys. And girls. Love 'em both, though admittedly I can easily live without girls, while I kinda, y'know, need a man around the house. Know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying. Yeah, I can tell. I can read your mind, man. I know exactly what you're picturing right now. Heh.

At any rate, props to you for bringing up both my physical hotness and my sexual proclivities in the same thread, completely hijacking the topic of the original poster. You win the desperate dude award. But don't feel bad, man. Half the guys out here have behaved the same way on this board at one point or another.

There are many ways you could have responded to my comment, you chose the absolutely worst way and exposed your anally retentive nature. But don't worry, that just means you'll fit right in with the rest of the I-Banking crowd.

Sep 6, 2018 - 4:04pm

I know it sounds crazy, but stay away from junk food, drink tons of water, a lot of fruit, and eat to sustain yourself. Try not to over indulge on burgers, soda and fries. This coupled with the gargantuan amount of impending stress will keep you relatively fit. good luck.

"Cut the burger into thirds, place it on the fries, roll one up homey..." - Epic Meal Time
Sep 6, 2018 - 4:05pm

Well... it'll help, vadremc. But bear in mind that a lot of people are hitting their first full-on adult metabolism slowdown, coupled with a sudden and intense decrease in exercise and an increase in the type and amount of free food offered. Most guys in college can easily eat 2500 calories a day or more if they're active. Most analysts will probably need to ratchet that down to 1600-1800... which is a pretty harsh restriction for some, "eating right" or not.

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Sep 6, 2018 - 4:12pm

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"Cut the burger into thirds, place it on the fries, roll one up homey..." - Epic Meal Time
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