Using a burner account for obvious reasons. Last May I graduated college, one week after that I moved ~7 hours away to a new city, and a week after that I started at a F500 in FP&A.
I'm not going to get into the details since it gets dark, but since the move I've had an extremely hard time meeting people, I'm not happy with my work, and I don't know how I feel about this city still. It was there slightly before the move but I'm not happy and feel dead inside almost constantly, and it's just been exacerbated by moving and starting my job. I look back on my life and it's filled entirely with regret, especially when I read through here and LinkedIn. I know I'm way too hard on myself but I can't help be pissed that I was an absolute fuck up in high school, which lead me to a terrible school and a job I'm not happy with. I've tried to make sure it doesn't it impact my work, but honestly I just don't really care anymore. Not about the people my role supports, what my boss thinks, or about the work I'm doing. I'm just done with it all, yet I feel so trapped.
I've tried pretty much all the typical advice: I'm currently seeing a therapist (she's suggested I seek other opinions about meds but I don't really like the idea), I've tried joining sports leagues but I never get put on a team, I exercise but it doesn't bring me happiness anymore (it sounds crazy but I really only exercise to 'punish' myself now), and I tried picking up 1-2 new hobbies but I've honestly just lost the motivation. I don't really have the motivation to do anything anymore, most days are work -> therapy -> home / go to sleep at 8:30 -> repeat.
I've started to consider what I should do. Going back where I came from isn't an option, moving to a new city will just bring the problems with me, I don't have the qualifications for any jobs I do want, and I don't want to work in this role anymore. I have a little bit of money saved up, if I cashed out all accounts I could probably survive for a little over a year. I thought about just doing that and up and leaving. I could then deal with the consequences later, but luckily I'm self aware enough to realize that probably isn't a great idea. I doubt I'll ever get into the finance role I want, so I've thought about going back to school but I don't have the math background for any STEM graduate degrees, so I don't know what I'd even go for.
I know I just need to keep seeking help and unfortunately pushing through. But I wanted to see if anyone else has ever been through something similar and what helped you.
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