Would you date a girl in finance

Question for the male bankers - would you be hesitant to date a female in the same industry & specifically in investment banking? I heard some of my peers say they are, but I wanted to learn the broad consensus and, if so, why?

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Comments (52)

  • Associate 2 in ER
Oct 9, 2021 - 6:38pm

Probably not: (1) no free time, (2) IB Lifestyle will make her body turn into gravy (3) constant mental health issues caused by banking lifestyle (for vast majority of people in the long run), (4) high ego, tend to be narcissistic. (5) The money a woman makes is irrelevant in a relationship. Simps will disagree but most guys, even on this forum would prefer a woman making $50k who is fit, feminine, and loving versus a GS TMT analyst that looks like death. 

  • Analyst 2 in IB - ECM
Oct 9, 2021 - 6:40pm

100% agree with #5. Every guy I know including myself. Her income is irrelevant. As long as she is working and doing something with her life

  • VP in PE - LBOs
Oct 9, 2021 - 7:33pm

I don't know where this idea of girls in finance being unattractive comes from. One of my friends from college went to GS TMT and she was a smokeshow. It's really not that hard to look keep looking good as long as you work out a couple times a week and don't eat like trash. In fact, there's strong correlations between education/wealth and fitness. People in finance are generally way more fit than the average American, and honestly, being fit at the end of the day is like nine-tenths of the way there to being attractive in our obese-AF country.

Oct 11, 2021 - 6:48pm

i always had the notion that finance females were hotter than those in say, tech, engineering or more "meritocratic"/quantitative fields

i think it comes from the fact that theres a lot of nepotism (rich caucasian females), as well as the fact that social skills and "polish" is needed for client facing roles, so usually only connected sorority (white) girls manage to break in

Oct 9, 2021 - 7:41pm

Disagree with points 2 and 5.  Guys in finance around the city tend to be in better shape then randoms, I assume this holds for girls too.  As for money, teachers, fitness trainers, nurses, etc. are attractive to me but I would not really want to date a girl who worked at McD's out of high school.

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  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
Oct 9, 2021 - 9:12pm

Interesting points. I disagree with points 2 and 5. I don't know any females in IB as of the moment who are fat shits - most of them have their shit together and that includes their physical body. Also in the long-term, your combined household income will be trash if you date a dumb broad that doesn't make good money. 

Most Helpful
Oct 11, 2021 - 4:42pm

I can probably be helpful as I have a family with a woman in PE. Hours as you get more senior tend to be easier and more flexible (though there's more of a sense of ownership and a need to always be responsive), so typically getting home at 6:30 isn't crazy, unless in the middle of closing a deal. Part of being with someone in this lifestyle is having someone motivated, so that means eating healthy, exercising and taking care of herself (regular visits to the derm), etc. As you get older, the "ego" part of it of who makes more and feeling good about ourselves providing becomes less important than being able to get nice things / do nice things as a fam and having financial flexibility. Unless you've made it at a hedge fund, having a family in the city is a financial strain until (maybe) you make it as an MD - having someone else carry the burden means you can do all the nice things and not have that strain much earlier in life. If what you want is a girl who's friends and family are impressed that you work at GS, then dating a girl in finance isn't for you (and TBH a lot of us value that more than we think). Also if you never plan on having kids, the "additional money" you make in finance doesn't really matter, yours or hers.

  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
Oct 9, 2021 - 6:40pm

Nope. The personality required for a woman to be in finance is the opposite of what men want in their wives/girlfriends

  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
Oct 10, 2021 - 1:58am

Yeah, let's be realistic. If you want to make it in finance, you need to be a type-A personality, low agreeableness, ultra-competitive, work-obsessed, aggressive etc. These qualities are fine (even attractive to some) in men but in women, it's usually repulsive to most men

Oct 10, 2021 - 12:25pm

Yeah. It's a lot easier to date someone who's aligned with your values. Chances are if you're into fin, a girl in finance is also likely to be extremely hard-working, competitive, and someone that can push you to be better. That sounds a lot better to deal with than someone who thinks your evil and greedy or whatever lol.

I guess my answer is I wouldn't date a girl in finance, I'd marry one.

  • Intern in PE - LBOs
Oct 10, 2021 - 4:06pm

Guess it would depend on who the girl is. As others pointed out some women in finance can be unattractive, but some are attractive as well. Same is true for guys – some look like they have never hit the gym in their life, but some find a way to regularly do. I have seen some attractive girls in finance, but whether or not I would want to date them would come to their personality (again as someone else pointed out, high ego is a huge no go), but if I feel like we have common interests, aspirations and are a good fit for each other, then why not.

Of course, the likelihood of the above happening in finance is pretty low, but I try to go in with an open mind.

Edit: Unlike others I would probably go for a girl who is either doing an advanced degree or also in a competitive field, including finance (and earning at least ok money), rather than someone who is only attractive. I have an engineering degree, so I am always curious to learn something new and would want to spend time with someone who challenges me intellectually.

Oct 10, 2021 - 5:35pm

I've seen some absolute baddies in VC, HF and consulting, so yeah sure I would. Finding the time and right fit is another question. 

Array

Oct 10, 2021 - 7:27pm

Not a chance in hell, wouldn't date someone in law either. The personalities of women who enter those fields (along with the job lifestyles) is terrible & not at all conducive with a healthy, LT relationship 

  • Analyst 2 in IB - Cov
Oct 11, 2021 - 3:20pm

The personality of girls going into Investment Banking and motivations are the same as yours -- work hard, get an ROI on your hardwork, go into the best jobs ($$ and exit opps) and live the best life you can. I am baffled at how much speculation and unfounded generalization there is about their personality. 

  • Investment Analyst in RE - Comm
Oct 11, 2021 - 8:27pm

IMO there's a distinction to be made between a junior banker in IB using the role as a stepping stone vs a career banker. A lot of these negative stereotypes only seem to hold true for the career bankers, i.e. the women that want to make IBD Director / MD. I know quite a few cool / feminine / dateable women who used an IB analyst stint to go into a smaller VC fund / tech corp dev / strategy / sales roles that work very normal hours and have lots of time for relationships.

Funniest
Oct 11, 2021 - 10:48pm

If i enter a relationship with someone who isn't in finance I can use all the fancy jargon and make my work sound important (and me sound smart).

If she's in finance she'll know the truth...

Array

  • 6
Oct 12, 2021 - 3:30am

I would rather date a girl outside of IB and I expect a lot of guys would agree. Girls in STEM, tech, even consulting are interesting because I don't have to talk about finance with her. It's so necessary to have a break from the industry. If she's attractive she doesn't have to make a killing anyway, she just needs something to keep her busy during the day. 

Oct 12, 2021 - 9:02am

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