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WSO Caption Contest - Jan 29th... Collect Silver Bananas and Win a Free Wall Street Oasis T-Shirt

We have a fun new contest each week to let our funniest members win a free WSO T shirt with their witty inner genius. All you have to do is leave a comment in this post with a caption you think is most fitting for the cartoon posted below. The winner will be determined by the community based on the number of Silver Bananas awarded to each comment. In the event of a tie, the admins of the site will decide the winner or send out multiple free shirts if we can't decide. Wall Street jokes welcomed and encouraged!


Life Lessons from a Game of Pickup Basketball

Some years ago I was playing pickup basketball regularly at a local gym. It was pretty competitive; the regulars included high school stars and college players, of which I was neither. I was good enough to run with them, but it was an exclusive group and most weren't so lucky.

One day during the holidays we didn't have enough players; we preferred full court five on five, so we were forced to let some walk-ins run with us. I'll never forget two of the players that ran with us that day because seeing them walk into the gym taught me valuable lessons about first impressions.

The Impressions

Subject 1 was tall and muscular with big hands and long arms; he was an imposing bundle of explosive, fast-twitch athleticism. He was handsome, outgoing, well-spoken, and seemed to have the right mix of confidence and humility. He had all the latest gear; brand new Nike shoes and shorts, an arm sleeve, and a leg sleeve with a padded knee. We assumed right away he'd run with us as a regular rotation guy.

We almost didn't let subject 2 run. He looked like a scruffy pre-teen. At about 5'8' he was average height, but he was skinny and he there was no indication of any latent athleticism. He had severe acne and a poor haircut; busted shoes; and old, dirty gym clothes, all of which is only worth mentioning because of the stark contrast with Subject 1. Furthermore, he was quiet and aloof, though to his credit he seemed focused. We ended up letting him run because we needed ten players.

The Reality

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Look Ma', Pretty Graphs!

The Company Database is in the middle of some pretty dramatic improvements, including our ability to take some of the aggregated data and start graphing it on the Company Overview pages (as shown in the image above).

This is just the start -- we plan on showing data for Top Schools (from where does each firm recruit primarily), Diversity Metrics (race as a % if interviewees) among many other interesting and useful stats.

WSO Stock Price Contest #9: HPQ

There was no winner for last week's contest (Netflix) as all you suckers were all too far off (closest guess was $35 off)

HPQ is currently at $28.49, what will it's stock price be at market close on Friday Jan 31th?

Closest guess to the closing price on Friday wins a free WSO tshirt.

Rules: You must submit your guess by 11:59pm ET Wednesday (Jan 29th (time extended since post had an errr yesterday), and your guess must be within $5 of the closing price.

Direct Access to Company Compensation, Interview Insights and Company Reviews with New WSO Company Database Search

I'm very excited to announce our latest improvement to the WSO Company Database - Search by Content type.

If you go to the WSO Company Database, you will now see that you can jump from tab to tab to directly search for Compensation, Interview or Review data by a bunch of filters (not just company search you have to go through now).

The beauty of this (and as we add more filters by end of day tomorrow) is you will be able to search for specific compensation and interview data by Country, by City, by Division / group, by industry, etc...

The company search is still open to all and the compensation, review and interview data is still accessible to anyone that adds their own data (we scrub that data every night).

Apple Whiffs, Gets Pounded After Hours

Ahhh....woulda, shoulda, coulda. About a half hour before the close yesterday, I got it in my head that AAPL was going to throw up a miss on their numbers, so I put in a limit order for a handful of the Jan 550 Puts at $13. From that moment on they never got cheaper than $13.05, and I didn't get filled. What I wouldn't give today to have coughed up that extra nickel...

After the close Apple announced that iPhone and iPad sales were nowhere near what was expected, and further went on to say that next quarter (you know, the one we're in right now) wasn't exactly gonna light the world on fire either. So much for China Telecom. Predictably, traders beat the stock like a rented mule in after hours trading, at one point sending it $46 a share lower. From what I'm seeing now, it looks set to open around $511 a share, down roughly $40 from yesterday's close.

Those options I had an order on? Probably worth about $50 apiece this morning. Just a four-bagger overnight, no big deal. Wanna hear something even worse? I bought Feb 525 Puts for $40 apiece way back on October 21 and held on to them until December 18, when I sold them at $22.25 for a 50% loss. Even those things will probably be worth the $40 I paid for them today at the open. God, I hate Apple.

Financial and Valuation Modeling Boot Camp (New York City)

Attended by investment banking, private equity, corporate finance professionals, MBA students, and those in career transitions, Wall Street Prep's popular Boot Camps bridge the gap between academics and the real world, to equip professionals and students with practical financial skills they need on the job.

Boot Camp Agenda
Day 1 Financial Statement Modeling and Excel Best Practices
Day 2 Valuation Overview and DCF Modeling
Day 3 M&A (Accretion/Dilution) Modeling
Pre-recorded 8-hour video lectures of LBO Modeling
Online 15-hour Trading & Transaction Comparables Modeling

Live Seminar Highlights:

January 30, 2014 - 8:00am to February 1, 2014 - 5:00pm
Event type: 
Other Happy Hour

Monday @Mentions January 27, 2014

Thread of the Week:

This will come as a surprise to no one, as Why I Left A Seemingly Perfect Megafund PE Gig For A Guaranteed Salary of $0.00 was posted and re-posted throughout the week, and might just be the most shared post in WSO history. @"Ben_KickassAcademy" definitely struck a nerve with his tale of walking away from what most of us here would consider a dream job for the uncertainty of a life spent on the beaches of Copacabana. The original post was awarded 20 Silver Bananas and an astounding 324 Facebook Likes, and the discussion is created led to dozens more Silver Bananas. Makes me wonder if we all secretly crave a life of waking up at a the crack of noon and spitting game at the hotties on the beach all day and night...

Comment of the Week:

Okay, so I wrote what I thought was a pretty innocuous post on wealth inequality based on a recent study by Oxfam. I guess I should have figured that it would go shitshow on me, as any post on this site that merely suggests the system might not be 100% meritocratic often does. That said, there were some really great comments made in this thread, not the least of which was one by @"NYU" highlighting the dichotomy between intelligence and education (and that intelligence is presumably distributed evenly throughout our species, but that education is largely a function of one's socioeconomic background). This single comment earned him 8 Silver Bananas. I also have to mention @"NorthSider" in the same thread. He may not have racked up the same banana count, but his analysis is always crazy in-depth and there's never any ambiguity as to why he believes the things he believes.

Caption Contest Winner:

@"archipelago" wins the caption contest this week with his riff on Office Space over here. Well done!

Unhappy at MBB

Young and ambitious ladies and gentlemen, I am feeling unhappy and want to share my thoughts with you. Not a fan of whining in the Internet, but I have found it hard to find people who I can open up to and who can also truly empathize with my situation.

A little background, I did my undergrad in engineering at a top US program (MIT/Caltech/Stanford). I thought of myself as very sociable and thus did not want to go into an engineering career. Don't get me wrong, I love engineering, but I was afraid of getting into a fulltime job surrounded by colleagues I did not feel I fit in well with. Let's face it too, before I hit the real world, I was very ambitious and felt I was worth more than a $200k annual paycheck by the time I made senior engineer in my mid 30s.

Questions you would ask a CEO about their company?

Working in a small mm, and I do a bit of sourcing and I have been getting better at it via the phone, but I know I still have a lot to learn. I am making phone calls to small-to-middle market companies and asking to speak to CEOs to see if they are interested in a financial partner or selling.

What are the questions you would ask when sourcing a deal??

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