Crabcakes and football, that's what Maryland does

One Fucker

Today I accompanied my MD and a VP from FIG on a pitch to some fuck in midtown. We got a car to transport us to his building where he was waiting outside. No jacket, and the first three buttons undone underneath his tie, he held his arms out and greeted us with "crabcakes and football, thats what Maryland does." I was the first out of the car (b/c I was the last in) and I stood up into this bafoon with puddles of sweat under his arms. I couldnt help it, I laughed my ass off. The guy then says, "ge whiz (MD's name), you got yourself a giggler here."
We then proceed to go up to the guy's office where he has two hardcore porno magazines sitting in plain view. He says to me, "hey giggles, you see that rack?"
I say, "indeed."
He replies, "that's my girl."
I replied, "o, shes beautiful."
This shithead then says, "yeah she fucks well."
This is something straight out of the movies. I was taking a sip of water when he said, "she fucks well," and I lost a good ounce of it onto my lap. The shithead says, "jesus kid, you need a bib? This shit happened at noon and I am still laughing my ass off.

----Does it piss you off that the hot girls always flock to the ugliest fattest rude guys around? I can't figure it out.